He gave me the name of the hotel. I hung up and then called the airport, setting up a charter flight to fly out as soon as I could get there.
I was running on adrenaline, coffee, and hope beyond all hope that I hadn’t fucked up completely with Leah.
It wasn’t until the plane was hurling across the United States at thirty thousand feet that the fear took root. But it wasn’t fear about my business. Let the board do what it will. Even if I was out, I had stock and savings. I could start a new business. One that would fit a father.
No. My fear was Henry. I knew Leah well enough to know that even if she didn’t want to risk her heart with me, she wouldn’t keep my child from me. That meant Henry was going to find out what I’d done with Leah. That I was the father of her child.
My heart broke as I thought about losing his love and respect. I had no doubt he would be civil and even supportive, but I knew it would disappoint him. He’d never look at me the same.
I inhaled a breath, knowing that I had to accept that loss if I was going to have what I really wanted. I wanted Leah. I wanted to drown in her light and sweetness. I wanted to give her everything I had to give. It wasn’t enough. She definitely deserved a better man than me, but fuck it. I was tired of trying to do the right thing. The right thing made me feel empty and lonely. This time I’d try something different. This time I’d seek out love.
I just hoped Leah was willing to forgive me and give me a chance to be a better man.
Chapter 27
Leah
I liked Los Angeles, but it wasn’t New York. I was grateful that this job, if I got it, would allow me to live in New York still. Of course, I had to get the job. I was feeling good about it, but I didn’t know who I was up against to know if I had stiff competition or not.
I’d planned to sightsee today, but I was tired. It turned out growing a baby caused a lot of fatigue. Instead I decided to lounge in my sweats and bone up for my meeting tomorrow.
I was just getting ready to order lunch, when there was a knock on my door. I wondered if maybe Megan was stopping by to check in with me. She’d said she might.
I looked through the peephole and my heart stopped. Sebastian. I blinked because it couldn’t be true. My mind had to be playing tricks on me. I looked again. Yep. It was Sebastian.
I opened the door, wishing I didn’t look such a mess, and then chastising myself. I didn’t know why he was here, but nothing had changed. He was all business all the time. What did it matter that I looked like the crypt keeper?
“Leah.” His chest heaved and his eyes filled with emotion as if he hadn’t expected me to open the door.
“Sebastian. What are you doing here?”
He swallowed and simply stared for a minute. His gaze took in my face and roamed down to my stomach. I covered my belly and wondered for a minute if he knew.
When his gaze returned to mine, he gave me a tentative smile. “I’m here to see you.”
“Why?”
His smile faltered. “Can I come in?”
I nodded and held the door open. He entered but didn’t go all the way in, instead staying close to me.
“Do you want some coffee or tea? Actually, I’ll have to order tea because I’ve drunk it all.” I’d read that I should avoid caffeine, so I’d switched to herbal tea.
He shook his head.
“Well, come in. There’s a pretty view from the living area.”
He followed me and it occurred to me that he was nervous. Normally he was a take charge kind of guy.
“Is everything okay?” I sat on the couch. I’d expected him to sit in a chair or on the opposite couch but he sat on the coffee table in front of me.
“No. Nothing is okay.”
I studied him, noticing the dark circles and tired lines around his eyes. His hair looked like he’d raked his fingers through it a million times.
I rested my hand over his. “What’s wrong?”
He turned his hand over, lacing his fingers with mine. A part of me wanted to pull away, because his touch made my heart race with hope and need. I didn’t want to let that take hold if he was simply going to push me away again or ask for an affair.
“I’m a fucking mess, Leah.”
“I’m sorry. Did the board find out about us?” I was surprised my father hadn’t said anything.
He shook his head. “But I hope they do.”