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He looks over his shoulder at the sound of my voice, his lips quirking up in surprise.

“Decide to join me after all?”

“Yeah, yeah I did.” I stop beside him. I’m slightly out of breath, having had to run farther than I anticipated since his long legs had already carried him so far away.

“Good. You hungry?”

“Not really,” I admit.

He makes a sound.

We trudge through the sand to the stands, passing Meredith and my sister.

Meredith stops, her jaw dropping, and my sister grabs her arm, yanking her

. Meredith gives me a look that tells me I’m going to owe her a major explanation with lots of details.

Jasper steps into line at one of the sandwich shacks and orders two wraps and two waters.

He hands them a card that he pulls from a zippered part of his wetsuit. Taking back his card and food he nods for me to follow him to one of the tables.

He chooses a small red table that sits crookedly in the sand with two chairs that do the same.

He hands me a bottle of water and a wrap.

“I didn’t want anything,” I remind him.

He shakes his head, tearing into his. “EatWhatchaCan,” he slurs around the large bite he took.

I shake my head and remove the paper from around the wrap. It looks good. It’s not something I’d normally I get.

I take a bite, chew and swallow. “This is delicious,” I tell him.

“See, you were hungry and didn’t know it.” He chuckles as I take another bite. “How’d you know T.J.?” he asks.

“Oh … um, I’m friends with Spencer, that’s how.”

He nods. “Yeah, him and Spencer were best friends. I haven’t seen him since the funeral. I told him he could talk to me, and he’s practically like family. It’s weird not having them both around.”

“Are you in college?” I ask.

God this whole small talk thing is super weird and awkward.

“Just finished my second year.” A look crosses over his face.

“What is it?” I prompt.

“I’ve been doing a lot of thinking since T.J. passed. It’s nearing two months now, and I just … I don’t see myself going back to college, at least not this year. I need time,” he admits. “That probably makes me sound like a wimp, but I’d only been home a couple of weeks when we got the call he was dead. I’d just seen him that night, laughing and happy, and alive. Hearing he was gone was a wake-up call that I need to figure out what I want to do with my life.”

“I’m the last person who’s going to judge you,” I admit, taking a sip of water. “I was diagnosed with kidney disease at fourteen. I only recently got a transplant.” I pause, taking a breath, part of me wanting to tell him his brother’s kidney is inside me, but I can’t. I can’t, because for whatever reason, I’m drawn to this guy and I know that the truth will only send him running away. “And I’ve decided not to go to college this year, like all my friends are. I’m taking a year off for myself, just to live. I want to do all the things I haven’t gotten to do.”

I haven’t told my parents my decision yet. I’m positive they already know since nobody has brought up college.

“Whoa,” he whispers. “I … I can’t even imagine that.” He runs a hand over his short hair. “But you’re okay now?”

“Yeah, I’m doing great. The last few years haven’t been easy, and it’s kept me from doing a lot of things. Fear, mostly. Dialysis sucks, but it’s not entirely debilitating.”

“So,” he starts, and waits until he finishes chewing to continue, “what are things you want to do?”


Tags: Micalea Smeltzer Romance