But she had, in a way. Not that she’d come to the lodge expecting happily ever after, but she’d wanted it. Beck and Seth had both encouraged the idea. And after the beautiful lesson on communication and the stunning intimacy that followed, she’d awakened this morning full of optimism. In the back of her head, she’d already been clasping their hands, putting on a white dress, and enrolling in childbirth classes. They’d just been trying to help her grow.
The waitress set down Raine’s wine. A dribble sloshed over the rim because she was too busy making time with Beck to care. She settled his coffee in front of him with a smile. “Sugar? Cream?”
The woman made the two words last about ten syllables each, and Raine lost her patience. “Thanks. If you didn’t notice, he’s trying to straighten out my life. He’s single, but he doesn’t live around here. And unless you like welts with your spanking, you’re barking up the wrong tree.”
The mousy brunette recoiled and looked at Beck as if he’d turned into Satan. “Let me know if I can get you more coffee or wine.”
Then she scurried off. Beck turned to Raine. A smile played at his mouth. “I should beat your ass for that, but it was damn funny.”
Raine winced. “I’m glad you’re not mad. Sometimes I lose my temper. Sorry if you were interested in—”
“Not her,” Beck assured. “Let’s get back to you.”
She knew damn well he’d given her a reprieve. “After fighting for a month, maybe I was unrealistic to think they wouldn’t ever have a dispute about me again. I guess I just didn’t want to feel torn anymore. I want them to get along. I want them to be adults, damn it.”
“If you ever repeat this, I’ll deny I said it. But men can be large children. They fight and draw lines in the sand and need time outs…”
“They were trying to hurt one another,” she pointed out.
“Sometimes guys do that. It’s the verbal equivalent of whipping it out to see whose is bigger.”
Raine shook her head. “But they were using me to hurt each other. It really pisses me off that they push me to break through all my barriers to communicate and to be honest with them when they’re not doing the same with me.”
“That’s valid,” Beck agreed. “I’m sure they’ve realized it by now. But I think today was their first step toward being truly honest with one another. It got ugly because they got everything out in the open. They needed it, in my opinion. I know you didn’t want to hear all that, but I think it’s good you did.”
As much as she hated it, Beck was probably right. “Hammer didn’t try to get me pregnant. He just didn’t try not to. He was drunk, and everything happened fast. But I don’t think it was intentional. Liam is wrong about that.”
“So tell him.”
Gnawing her lip, Raine nodded, filtering back through the verbal war she’d heard. “Do you know everything that happened between Liam and his ex-wife?”
“Nope. He’s always kept me at a distance. I don’t think he liked my friendship with Hammer much. It’s been better the last few days, but we’ll see what happens. If you want to know more about Gwyneth, ask him, not me. I’m not the one who can tell you.”
Beck was just full of good points tonight, damn him. Raine sipped her wine and watched him grimace at his coffee.
“Do you think Hammer thinks of me as a substitute for Juliet?”
Without a second of hesitation, Beck shook his head. “No. I think whatever he once felt for her died not long after she swallowed those pills. He finally saw her as she was—and it wasn’t the woman he’d convinced himself he loved, in my opinion. You…” He pointed at her. “You are what he’s needed. That’s why he’s in love with you. Ditto for O’Neill. I don’t know his troubles, but I know he’s got them. Just like I know you’re a balm for them.”
He made all the disaster in her life sound so simple to fix—love. And she’d kill to know what secret Hammer kept that Liam had to forgive him for…but even if Beck knew, he wouldn’t spill.
Raine choked back another sip of her vino. “I think what hurt me most was the moment I realized that Liam never had any intention of this threesome lasting beyond our time at the lodge. And I know we didn’t talk about that or agree to it on a permanent basis, but…I love them both. What did he think was going to happen? I could kneel for them and be complete for a few days, then give it up? Being here has made me realize this is what I need. You tried to tell me that back at your condo.”