There was no doubting that Mac believed I was the reason. That scared the hell out of me. What if Mac saw something that I was having trouble accepting? I needed to thank him and then go back into the bar with Brandy. I could still fix all this. But the idea of putting my hands on the woman made my mouth fill with a less than pleasant taste.
"Okay, thanks," I murmured, even as I glanced at my watch. It wasn't far to Jolene's house, but it was after one in the morning.
"Go home, Travis," Mac said. I wasn't sure if it was an order or suggestion, but it didn't matter either way. I went around to the driver’s side of the truck and got in. I glanced up to see Mac returning to his date, but when he went to put his arm around her, she pulled away. If my thoughts hadn't been consumed with Jackson, I would've wondered what Mac was doing such a cold fish of a woman like Susan Carlisle. They'd been dating for at least a year, but I'd rarely seen them touch.
I tried not to think about Jackson or the ad I’d deleted as I drove back to the ranch. I knew I needed to come clean with him about what I’d done, but the idea that he’d just repost the thing and find the hardware store asshole was unacceptable to me. And that just made me feel like an even bigger dick.
I secretly hoped Jackson would be back at the ranch by the time I got there, but when I checked his room, it was exactly as he’d left it. I went back to my own room and tried to sleep, but it was a waste of time because every car door I heard slam shut outside had me getting up to check if it was Jackson. By morning I was practically dead on my feet, but the first thing I did was go to Jackson's room and knock on the door. But there was no response and when I opened it, the room was in the same state.
I spent the day doing my regular day off chores like laundry. When Jackson hadn’t returned by the time night fell, I started to get antsy and tried to call him. But there was no answer. A call to Jolene proved no more fruitful, since all she did was say Jackson was busy. Jolene and I had always gotten along, but there was no mistaking the disappointment in her voice. She assured me Jackson would be back at the ranch the following day for work and then hung up on me.
But Jackson didn't return the following day, or the one after that. None of the other hands knew where he was and calls to Jolene went unanswered. I even went so far as to drive by her house, but there was no response to my knocks on the door. Once I got back to the ranch, I bypassed the house I shared with Jackson and the other hands and drove straight up to the main one.
I could hear raised voices coming from inside—Mac's voice and a woman's. I knew I should leave them alone since they were clearly in the midst of an argument, but my concern for Jackson was too great. I pounded my fist on the door and kept doing so until it was ripped open. Mac stood there, seemingly pissed, but strangely calm too. He was one of those guys who even when he was furious, you couldn’t necessarily tell it. But I'd seen him beat the shit out of a hand once who'd been abusing one of the ranch horses. Mac was not a guy you wanted to mess with… ever.
"Where is he?" I asked. "He hasn't been home in three days and no one is answering at Jolene's house."
I expected Mac to rip me a new one for the interruption, but I was surprised when he drew in a breath and looked at me kind of sadly. "He asked for some time off. Said he needed to go to his cabin."
My stomach dropped out at the words. Jackson wasn't supposed to go to his cabin until the weekend. It was only Tuesday. Had he somehow gotten the ad back up? Had Hardware Guy responded? Were they even now together at the cabin?
"Sir, is there any way I can—" I began to say and then realized what I was asking for and what message the question could possibly send. People on the ranch knew that Jackson and I were friends, but my behavior was over the top. The right thing to say to Mac was to thank him for the information and then get my ass back to work. But that wasn't what I wanted.