I expect those words to hit her hard, but instead, her shoulders slump, brows folding together. “Therapy is bullshit?” she repeats, shaking her head. “We’re back to this?”
“You know what I mean,” I say flippantly.
“No, I don’t think I do. And I don’t think you understand how therapy didn’t just help me — it saved me. And in a lot of ways, so did Gavin. I’m sorry you hate to hear that, but it’s true.”
I force a long inhale, folding my arms over my chest and shaking my head over and over as I stare out her floor-to-ceiling window at the Miami skyline.
“Look, I’m glad you’re perfect and you’ve got everything figured out in your life,” she says, tossing a pair of sandals into her bag with more force than necessary. “No trauma in your life. No feelings to sort through. Absolutely no family drama at all for you, right?”
I grit my teeth. “Don’t bring my family into this.”
“Oh, of course not. Why would I? We never talk about them, do we?”
Her words slam into me.
“That’s how it always goes,” she continues. “I’m the crazy one for going to therapy, but you’re completely sane not talking about your mother’s abandonment, her addiction, the way that addiction spread to your older brother, how she’s back now, how Clayton’s relationship with her is different – will forever be different from yours.”
I swallow the knot in my throat, still too angry to admit she might be right.
“I have to get to the airport,” she says, forcefully zipping up her bag.
Her declaration snaps me back to the present moment, to the whole reason I was angry in the first place.
“I don’t want you seeing him.”
“Well, that’s just too damn bad.”
I hook her elbow when she tries to swing past me. “What would you do if this were me? What if Shawna showed up and wanted to be my friend?”
Erin’s brows pinch together, and she shakes her head. “Are you kidding?” She rests her hand on my forearm, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I would be happy for you. After what happened between you two, the way things went down? I would be ecstatic for that closure for you, for that opportunity to mend a relationship that meant so much to you — even if was just platonic now.”
“I don’t need a relationship with her. I don’t ever want to talk to her again.”
“And that’s your choice. I respect it.” She shakes her head, her doe eyes searching mine. “Why can’t you do the same for me?”
My jaw muscles pop, and I look away from her, trying again to see through my fury and understand what she’s saying.
But I just fucking can’t.
Erin sighs, dropping her hold on me and moving for her door again. “You can let yourself out. Just lock up before you go.”
“Erin,” I say, catching her elbow again.
She pauses at the door, turning to look at me with eyes that tell me more than her words that she’s not just sad we’re fighting.
She’s disappointed.
In me.
And I wish I could be level-headed, that I could see it from her point of view, but regardless of how pissed off I am, I don’t want her to leave like this.
I gently tug until she lets me pull her into my arms, and I wrap her in a fierce hug, letting out a slow breath at the way she feels in my arms, her head against my chest, the scent of her hair in my nose.
“I love you,” I remind her.
“I love you, too.”
I swallow as she pulls away, waiting for me to say something else. But I don’t have anything to say that wouldn’t upset her more — or me.
So I say nothing at all.
She leaves.
And I punch a hole through her wall.
“SHOT SKI! SHOT SKI! Shot ski! Shot ski!”
You would think it’s Spring Break instead of a family holiday weekend by the amount of twenty-something year olds gathered around the pool at La Rose Roja Resort. The girls and I were all pleasantly surprised to find it so packed and happening when we arrived yesterday, the resort employees handing us our first fruity cocktails.
And the party has raged on ever since.
As to be expected, we nearly blacked out on our first night, not even bothering to get all dolled up to go out. We just got to our penthouse, freaked the fuck out over what Brandon had set up for us, and then promptly changed into our swimsuits and went down to the pool party.
After that, things got a little fuzzy.
A few things I remember…
One, Jess dancing on the bar during a wet t-shirt contest and winning easily when she decided the wet t-shirt was just getting in the way, so she stripped it up over her head.
Two, Cassie and Ashlei making a giant, teetering pyramid out of beer cans, stealing empties from every guy and girl alike to add to their masterpiece. They let out a victorious cheer when it finally got so big that it crashed to the ground and half of it ended up in the pool.