“Hey.” I kissed her hand. “I have no regrets. All I care about is you getting well again. My life today is just fine.”
“You’re all alone in North Dakota.”
Lora must have given her something or maybe she was just worn out, but she seemed a little loopy.
“I’m not. And you don’t need to worry about me,” I assured her.
“You’re my son. I worry. Who will love you, Cy? When I’m gone who will love you?”
Petal flashed in my brain. She wouldn’t love me the way my mother meant, but she was my friend. She cared for me just as Jude and April did.
“I’ve got people who care about me, mom. Don’t worry about that. You just need to get well.”
“Who?”
“Who what?” I asked, wondering if I should let her rest instead of talk to her.
“Who do you have that cares for you?”
“Well, there’s Jude and his wife.”
My mother made a face. “I don’t mean like that. I mean a family, Cy. I’m your only family.”
I held her hand in both of mine, not liking that it felt cold. “Jude is like a brother to me.”
“You need a woman Cy. Lora is wonderful to me. Maybe you should forgive her.”
I sighed. “I wish you wouldn’t worry about this mom. I’m fine. I don’t need a woman.”
“You still should forgive her.”
“I do mom.”
Her dark eyes looked at me with hope. “So, you’ll reconcile?”
I studied her for a moment, wondering if I should evade this conversation. If I told her the truth, that I had no future with Lora, she might get upset.
“Talk to her, Cy. For me.”
I nodded. I could talk to Lora. Not about reconciliation, but we could finally put the past to rest.
“I’ll talk to her.”
My mother’s lips turned up into a sweet smile. For a moment I wondered if I should go propose to Lora now if it would make my mom better. Of course, that was ridiculous. It was the desperate thought of a son terrified of losing his mother.
“You rest. I’ll be here when you wake up.” I stood and leaned over to kiss her forehead.
She was asleep by the time I finished standing. I made sure her covers were pulled up and then left the room. I headed down the hall and to the kitchen. Lora turned when I entered.
“I’ve got coffee.” She poured a cup and handed it to me.
I sat at the table and watched her, wondering what her response was to my mother’s desire to see us back together. She hadn’t said anything, but I couldn’t imagine my mother wasn’t encouraging her to talk to me too.
However, I wasn’t ready to revisit our relationship yet. “Thank you, Lora,” I said, taking the coffee. “I really appreciate all you’ve done for my mom.”
“Of course.” She sat across from me. I took a moment to study her. At one time, she’d been the center of my world. I’d carried a picture of her when I was off fighting so I could remember what I was fighting for and what was waiting for me when I got home. When I first learned that she hadn’t been waiting, I’d been so pissed. She’d been my world, and I’d been easily forgotten by her.
Now I realized that she was probably right to move on. It wasn’t fair of me to make her wait. She was alone a lot. She had family and my mother, but I guess she needed something more and I wasn’t there to provide it.