For the next three days, I go to college, but I barely concentrate on anything. I keep watching my phone, expecting Cloud003 to send me another text.
He doesn’t.
I should be thankful, but the unknown is killing me. At night, I re-read our exchanges and contemplate reaching out to him. He probably doesn’t know I lost my memories, and I could indulge him to get information.
But what if he knows and I put myself in danger?
My self-preservation instinct is better than that.
I push the door open and sigh heavily.
“Hey, Izzy.” I greet her as she carries grocery bags into the kitchen.
“Oh, you’re back,” she says with a bit of surprise in her tone.
“Am I not supposed to be?”
“You usually spend as much time as possible out before coming home.”
The squad did invite me to go out, but I wasn’t feeling it. I went with them yesterday, and it ruined my mood instead of lifting it.
“What are you going to do?” I motion at the grocery bags.
“Bake.”
My mood brightens. Finally something out of the ordinary. “Can I join?”
She completely freezes as if I just drove a knife into her heart. She blinks three times. “You…want to join me.”
“That’s what I said.”
“To bake?”
I nod.
“In the kitchen?”
“Is that so weird to ask?”
“It’s just you never step foot in the kitchen.”
“Well, that’s Old Reina. I’m a new person now.” I say the words louder than needed, as if I need to convince myself.
Every day I spend at college, I discover the atrocities the old me did. Even if I want to change, I can’t possibly undo what I did in the past.
Or can I?
Redemption is so hard when you don’t know where or how to start.
With a deep breath, I follow Izzy to the kitchen. The vast area is filled with stainless steel appliances and wh
ite marble.
“Must be a bitch to clean all this white,” I tell Izzy as she busies herself behind the counter.
“Tell me about it.” She pauses. “I mean, I’m fine with it.”
“You don’t have to watch what you say, Izzy. I swear nothing will get back to Alex.” I make a motion of zipping my mouth, locking it, and tossing the imaginary key out the window.