Jared exhaled and put a hand on Gabriel’s back, forcing himself not to stroke the silky-soft skin under his fingertips.
They lay in silence for a long while—the type of silence that could only be shared by people who knew each other inside out: achingly comfortable and content.
“Did you hate Jules?” Gabriel whispered suddenly, his finger tracing circles on Jared’s chest. “It’s okay if you did. I mean, it’s not okay, but I’d understand.”
“He’s a two-month-old baby,” Jared said. “I don’t hate babies until they’re at least three months old.”
Gabriel snickered, his breath tickling his skin in the most tantalizing way.
Jared had to take a few breaths before he could control his voice. “He looks a lot like you.”
“I guess,” Gabriel murmured, nuzzling into Jared’s shoulder and hooking his ankle around Jared’s. The sensation of Gabriel’s bare leg against his was almost unbearable in its intensity.
Jared gritted his teeth. He was used to Gabriel behaving like a touch-starved kitten, but this was ridiculous even for him. “Gabriel.”
“Mmm?”
“I’m half-naked,” Jared said tonelessly. “You’re half-naked, too. Stop groping me and get out of my bed.”
There was a moment’s silence.
“It never bothered you before.”
Jared gave a laugh. “It definitely bothered me. I just couldn’t say anything.”
“But—”
“Get out of my bed. Now.”
Gabriel didn’t move. “I don’t want to. What’s the big deal if we cuddle a little? It’s—”
“What’s the big deal?” Jared took a slow, measured breath. “Imagine sharing a bed with a half-naked girl you’re in love with. She has her naked tits pressed against you and you get all hot and bothered, but she says she just wants to cuddle.”
“Oh,” Gabriel breathed out, his tone painfully awkward. “That would suck.”
“It would. It does.” Jared ran a hand over his face. “Never mind. Just go back to your own room.”
Gabriel didn’t move.
Jared didn’t like his silence. He could practically hear him think. It made him nervous. “Whatever you’re plotting, stop it. And go.”
At last, Gabriel moved. But he didn’t get out of the bed. He lifted himself on an elbow and found the corner of Jared’s mouth in the darkness.
Jared flinched. “Gabe—”
“Come on,” Gabriel said. “We talked about it. It’s okay. We already did this twice. I liked it.”
Jared clutched the sheets in his hand. “You don’t have to do this.”
“I want to,” Gabriel murmured, brushing their lips together. “Come on, Jay. Take this.”
Soft lips. A touch. His body, shuddering with restrained need. Another touch. Gabriel’s scent. Blood rushing in his veins, to his cock.
And Gabriel’s voice. “Take this.”
Take this, take him, take this.
And Jared snapped, rolling on top of him and crushing their lips together. Gabriel let out a small startled noise, but he parted his lips, fucking inviting him in, and Jared completely lost it. He plundered Gabriel’s mouth with his tongue, memorized the softness, his taste, texture, everything about his lips and mouth, pouring five years of pent-up longing into the kiss, wanting in, wanting to ravage, own and fuck. He’d never wanted anyone so much that he was mindless with it, wanting to get inside of Gabriel and never come out.
“Stop me,” he said between the hungry, deep kisses, his cock so hard it was painful. His hips started moving, his erection rubbing against Gabriel’s hip. “Stop me.”
“It’s okay,” Gabriel murmured, stroking his back, as though trying to sooth the shudders of desire rippling through him. “It’s okay…”
No, it wasn’t, dammit.
Jared rolled off him and lay on his back, breathing raggedly. “Go,” he croaked.
“Can I stay?” Gabriel asked, haltingly.
“It’d be better if you go.”
“Jared—” A touch to his chest.
“Don’t touch me,” Jared growled, flinching away. “If you want to stay, stay, but stay away from me.”
Silence.
The mattress creaked as Gabriel turned his back to him.
Jared knew his harsh tone had hurt Gabe, but he was far too gone to control it. He burned with want. Burned for that ridiculous boy who had no common sense to push him away. It was obvious he couldn’t trust Gabriel to stop him before he went too far.
It took Jared a long while to get his body under control. When he did, he strained his ears. Gabriel was too quiet and still. He wasn’t asleep.
Sighing, Jared reached for his t-shirt and put it on. Then he moved closer to Gabe and pulled him flush against his chest. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly, pressing his face into Gabriel’s hair. “It’s not your fault.” It’s not your fault you don’t want me.
Gabriel leaned into his touch, the tension slowly dissipating from his body. “Good night, Jay.”
“Good night,” Jared said, dropping a kiss on his neck. If his lips lingered longer than necessary, well, he was only a red-blooded man.
Before long, Gabriel was asleep.
Jared lay awake for hours, holding him.
* * *
The baby woke her up at the crack of dawn.
The other side of the bed was empty once again and an icy cold feeling settled in the pit of her stomach.