When she finished feeding Jules, Claire laid him in his crib and left the bedroom.
She didn’t have to search for Gabriel long.
Opening the door to Jared’s room, Claire stared at the two entangled bodies on the bed. Gabriel was sound asleep in Jared’s arms, the top of his head pressed into the hollow of Jared’s throat. Jared’s hand was on Gabriel’s lower back and Gabriel had his ankle hooked around Jared’s. They weren’t naked. It was all very innocent.
And yet, her throat hurt and tears sprang to her eyes. She had been so wrong. Sex meant very little. Looking at them now, she would have preferred Gabriel fucking women on the side to seeing this. How could she think she could ever compete with that?
She closed the door and pressed her forehead against it.
It wasn’t fair.
It wasn’t fucking fair. She wasn’t a gold-digging attention-whore like some other WAGs. All right—she liked being able to buy anything she wanted and her relationship with Gabe helped her modeling career, but that wasn’t the most important thing for her. It truly wasn’t.
It wasn’t fair. How could she compete with that?
Did she even want to?
Was it worth it?
In all honesty, she wasn’t sure. A few weeks ago, she had been so determined to save their relationship, but was it salvageable? Could she truly accept that Jared would always mean something more to Gabriel than she and their son did?
Tears of overwhelming disappointment welled in her eyes, and on its heels came anger and hatred. For the first time, she felt nothing but pure hatred for Jared Sheldon.
It wasn’t fair.
Chapter 16: Bared
By the time Jared dragged himself out of bed and went downstairs, it was pretty late in the morning, but he didn’t feel particularly rested.
Gabriel was nowhere to be seen. Claire was in the kitchen, having breakfast. When she saw him, some emotion crossed her face, maybe resentment, or frustration, or even something close to despair.
“Good morning,” she said neutrally.
“Good morning,” Jared said, just as neutrally.
Silence fell upon the room as they looked at each other, and it was some time before it was broken.
“Have a seat,” Claire said with a forced smile. “Gabe left a couple of hours ago for some photo shoot.”
Jared sat down and accepted a cup of coffee from her.
He sipped the coffee in silence and tried to gather his thoughts.
Their eyes met for a brief moment. Both of them averted their gazes quickly.
“Is the baby asleep?” Jared asked at last, just to say something. Anything.
“Yeah,” Claire said.
“He seems like a healthy little boy.”
“Yes,” Claire said. “He’s a lot like his dad. He looks a lot like Gabriel, doesn’t he?”
Jared pasted a smile on his face. “Yes, he does.”
Another long silence that felt like an eternity followed.
Suddenly, Claire set her cup down and sprang to her feet. “All right, I can’t do it.” She glared at him. “You know what? I fully intended to be nice and understanding, but even I have limits. And when the father of my son spends the entire night with you, I can’t just say nothing and pretend that everything is fine!” She shook her head. “Don’t you have any shame? I thought you weren’t like that. He has a family, for God’s sake!”
“I’m not trying to break you two up,” Jared said in a clipped voice. “If I wanted to, I would have done it ages ago.”
A bitter smile curled her lips. “Oh yeah. Am I supposed to be grateful that you allowed me to be his girlfriend? It’s nice to finally see your true face revealed. You know very well how totally dependent he is on you, don’t you? Gabe might be emotionally stunted and unable to realize how unhealthy his feelings for you are, but you know it. It’s not love.” She met his eyes. “Admit it: deep down, you know he doesn’t love you. You know what he feels for you is just some twisted, sick dependency and misguided sense of gratitude.”
Jared clenched his jaw, trying not to let her words affect him. Gabriel loved him. He did. Maybe not that way, but he did.
And yet a tiny sliver of doubt crept in.
As though sensing it, she pressed on. “You know it. I can see it in your eyes. You know he can never love you the way he loves me. You will never be enough for him. So what is the point? Stop ruining our relationship! He was sixteen when you two met. He was an impressionable, vulnerable, paralyzed kid and you took advantage of him—you must have encouraged his weird fixation on you. And now he wants to make you happy.” She laughed. “Don’t you see you’re coercing him into something he doesn’t want? You make me sick. I have nothing against gay people, but why can’t you stay away from the rest of us and stick to your own kind? There’s nothing more pathetic than a gay man pining for a straight, taken guy. You’re—” Claire stopped mid-sentence and paled.