“I take it you aren’t going out tonight,” I say, crouching in front of her. She’d asked me to watch the kids while she and King went out for dinner.
“No. I’m sorry. I was going to call you to say not to come over.” She pauses. “But I wanted to see you. I’m worried about you, baby.”
“Don’t worry about me. You’ve got enough going on to worry about. How’s Robbie?” The last I heard, he’s not talking to her because she’s forbidden him from spending time with one of his friends who she thinks is a bad influence.
“He’s staying with your father for a while.” I hear the sadness in her voice and it kills me. Mum and Dad aren’t in a good place. Their relationship is worse than it has ever been because he’s become unreliable with his parenting. The last year has seen huge changes in our family after he remarried and started a new family. Where he was once diligent with sharing custody, helping Mum raise us, and just generally giving a shit about his kids, he’s practically forgotten us these days.
“How did that happen? Did he ask to go or did Dad actually show up and want to help?” I can’t hide the attitude I have towards him. At a time in my life when I’ve needed him, he hasn’t been there in any way for me.
“Don’t do that, Zara. Your father’s trying—”
“Are you kidding?” I stare at her with wide eyes. “When was the last time Dad tried to do anything for any of us? And since when do you defend him?” They’ve fought their way through as many years as I can remember. As far as I’m concerned, now isn’t the time for her to ease up on him.
She sighs. “I want you to have a relationship with your father, and while I know he’s a shitty dad at the moment, I’m hoping he’ll get himself together soon and go back to being the dad he was before everything changed for him. I hate seeing you shut down on him, because I’m worried your relationship will collapse completely.” Her voice softens, filled with concern as she adds, “I also hate that life is hardening you in all these ways this year. I just want you to stay my little girl. I know that’s silly and totally out of the question, but I could protect you better when you were little.”
I swallow hard, tears close to the surface. I refuse to cry another day over everything that’s happened; there have been far too many tears already. Taking a deep breath, I say, “I don’t see him changing any time soon, Mum. Not now that he’s found someone who falls at his feet.”
“I’m holding out hope.”
I shake my head at her. “Those pregnancy hormones have made you soft. Where’s the Lily King I know and love?”
A deep voice rumbles from the hallway, “Trust me, those fucking hormones haven’t made her soft on everyone.”
Glancing up, I grin at King as he enters the room. He’s right; she hasn’t gone soft on him. Besides those hormones and the pain caused by her fibroids, this pregnancy has kicked her ass with morning sickness, and she has less patience for King’s ways. Not that it’s caused problems between them. I’m not sure he would ever allow that to happen. King has this way of managing my mother that I’ve never seen anyone achieve. He seems to be able to sit back and let her go crazy for a while and then pull her back into line at just the right time. They argue their way through all of that, but at the end of the day, they’ve got each other’s back.
His eyes are trained on Mum. “You’re in pain again?”
“I’m okay.” She’s trying to downplay the situation. She’s always trying to do that, because King has a lot on his plate with the club and she doesn’t want to add to his worries.
He walks to her. “Don’t bullshit me, Lily.” Bending, he scoops her into his arms. “Your mother enlightened me. And fuck, I only have to take one look at you to know.”
She tries to fight him. “Put me down, King. I’m not in pain anymore and I want to spend some time with Zara.”
Ignoring her, he heads for the hallway. “I want you in bed, resting. Zara can spend time with you there.”
I follow them up the hallway towards their bedroom, listening as they argue the entire way. It’s almost comical sometimes, the way they carry on. King is such a dominant man but he has his hands full with my mother. I hope I find a man to love me the way he loves her. I mean, I could do without so much bossiness, but I’d take that over the way my father loves a woman any day. Not that I’d really call my father’s style, love. Now that I’m older and see things clearer, I can see that Dad is a highly insecure man who doesn’t really know how to express his love. Instead, he manipulates and attempts to control. And when he doesn’t get what he wants, he moves on, trying to find it from someone else.
King lays Mum down on the bed and sits next to her. “Your mother’s going to organise dinner and stay the night in case I get called out. You’re going to stay here and not move except to go to the bathroom. We clear?”
“God, King, no. I’ve got things to do—”
“You’ve got nothing to do that can’t wait.”
She exhales loudly, her frustration evident. “You can’t boss me around all the time. I promise you I’m resting when the pain hits.”
“I can and will do whatever the fuck it takes to ensure you’re okay and that our child is okay.” He’s forceful, commanding. Exactly what Mum needs, because if she has her way, she’ll be running around doing everything for everyone right up until the minute she delivers their baby. “And if that means I have to cancel my trip to Melbourne next week, I will, Lily. There’s no fucking way I’m letting anything happen to you.”
Mum is silent for a moment, simply staring up at King. Finally, she says, “You’re lucky I love you. I appreciate you looking out for me, but I don’t know many women who would put up with the way you get what you want.”
He drops a kiss to her lips and stands. “Well it’s a good fucking thing I only want you.”
I catch Mum’s smile as he turns to leave. She might fight like hell with him, but she’s still as besotted as she was when they first got together.
King’s eyes meet mine, shadowing with an expression I know means he’s going to ask me some hard questions. Jerking his chin, he says, “I need a minute.”
Once we’re out in the hallway, he says, “You made that appointment?”
Ugh. “Not yet.” At his frown, I add, “I googled psychologists, but honestly, there were so many to choose from and I couldn’t pick.”