I should have probably just gone to my general practitioner, but given Carter has had unprotected sex with me, I thought the gynecologist would be best. I should probably ask for a full panel of STD testing, regardless of Carter’s claim that he’s clean. Carter is a lying whore, so maybe he’s crawling with infections and just doesn’t know it.
Ugh.
Scowling, I flip past a few more pages before coming to the end of the magazine.
With a sigh, I put it back on the end table beside me and glance at the cute baby cover again. I refuse to touch it, as if distancing myself will somehow lessen the risk of unprotected sex. Now that I’ve broken up with Carter I’m not even sure I need birth control, but it’s better to be safe than sorry.
Not to mention, while I assume Carter will accept the break-up and move on, there’s always the off chance he won’t. Given our first interaction, if he decides to go back to bullying me now that I’m not sleeping with him, it’s possible he’ll take it to a new level. It’s possible Carter could get angry at my rejection once he realizes I’m serious and I’m sticking to my guns. It’s possible Carter could be inside me again before it’s all over with, whether I want him to be or not.
Just to cover all my bases, I think getting on birth control is the right choice.
“Zoey Ellis.”
I look up at the woman in scrubs holding a clipboard. She flashes me a quick, polite smile. I grab my purse and stand, then approach her with a quick, polite smile of my own. “Hello.”
Holding the door open, she nods inside. “Follow me this way.”
I follow her and go through the routine. Afterward she takes me to an exam room. Given what I’ve told her, she tells me I can undress because the doctor will probably want to give me a pelvic exam.
Once I’m changed into the thin paper gown and perched on the exam table, there’s nothing to do but wait. Waiting leads to thinking, and waiting in a paper gown on a table at my OB-GYN’s office leads my thoughts back to babies. I can’t shake the dread of having to tell even a doctor I had unprotected sex several times like an idiot. Logically I know the doctor doesn’t care and isn’t going to judge me, but it’s not something I would have done on my own, it’s not something I approve of myself doing, so in my imagination the sensible doctor is similarly horrified.
When she actually comes in, it’s with a polite, distracted smile, and a clipboard in hand. “Hi, how are you today?”
Stupid. “Good,” I offer, mirroring back her polite smile. I fold my hands together awkwardly in my lap. I have never actually been to the OB-GYN before, usually my general practitioner is sufficient.
“So, what brings you in today, Zoey?” she asks, glancing at the clipboard, then back at me. “I see you want to get on some birth control.”
I nod my head, absently squeezing my knees together. “Yes, that’s the main thing. I was also thinkin’ if it’s something you can do now, maybe I should get tested. I don’t think I have anything,” I offer quickly. “But just to be safe.”
Dr. Lucker nods. “Have you had unprotected sex recently?”
Swallowing, I nod my head. “Yes. A couple times. I know it was dumb,” I assure her, lest she feel the need to tell me. “It was spontaneous. If you can do something spontaneous multiple times…”
Smiling kindly at my somewhat apologetic tone, she tells me, “Accidents happen. When was this?” she asks, uncapping her pen and taking notes on her clipboard.
“Over the weekend.”
She nods. “And did you take anything afterward?”
“You mean like the morning after pill? No.”
“How long have you been sexually active?” she inquires.
“Since over the weekend,” I offer dryly.
She nods and glances up from the clipboard to look at me. “How many partners?”
“Just the one.”
Pressing the nub of her pen to paper, she jots a few more casual notes. She asks a few more common questions about when my last period was and how long I generally go between cycles. Then she declares—like an afterthought—that it’s possible I was ovulating over the weekend, and if not, I will be soon.
With my heart in my throat, I ask her, “Can you—I mean, it hasn’t been—Is there a blood test or something you could take to make sure I’m not?”
This time, she shakes her head. “It’s too early. It’s actually early enough that you don’t have to worry about it. If the earliest you had unprotected sex was 3 days ago, I can write you a prescription for emergency birth control, if you’d like. As long as you take it up to five days after possible conception, and it’s very effective.”