Because, even though I wanted to keep on laughing, the seriousness of his features told me otherwise.
This was real.
This was not a joke.
I pressed my hand to his shoulder and squeezed. “We need to talk about this, Cooper. I know this is because you don’t want me to come to New York as it disturbs my education, but I want to go.”
He shook his head. “You think you do. You think you want to come, and you think you want to go to a new school, but we’re talking about you moving states, moving into a city you’ve never been to. You’ll be leaving your family behind, your friends, the professors you do like and who like you. Your mentors… everything and everyone will change.”
“None of that matters. We’ll be together. That’s all that counts.”
“No. It isn’t. You don’t understand, Lauren. I’m going to have to pull some serious hours when I get there. Just because I graduated early doesn’t mean buttkiss to the agency. They’re taking me on because of my reputation, and I have to live up to that.”
One of his professors had spoken to an old friend about Cooper, and had recommended he work as an intern there one summer.
&
nbsp; He’d done so last year before I’d known him, had impressed the hell out of the agency, and the director, the professor’s friend, had told Cooper there was a job waiting for him if he graduated magna cum laude.
Cooper had.
A semester early.
That was the kind of guy my boyfriend was.
I gulped at the thought. “You can’t do this, Cooper,” I whispered when he pulled away from me and strode toward the window.
With his back to me, he whispered, “I have to. For both our sakes. You’re going to be all alone, and I’m not going to be there for you. Don’t you think I hate that? That this kills me? I don’t want to lose you, Lauren, but by being with me, you’ll lose everything else.
“There’s more to your life than this relationship. You have dreams you need to fulfill, goals to achieve. They don’t revolve around me, but by moving to New York, you’re making this all about me and I can’t handle that.”
He turned to look at me, a plea in his eyes but I refused to accept it. Acknowledge it.
“Get. Out.”
I spat the words at him, hating him for doing this to us.
I’d been so proud of his early graduation, hadn’t even realized the effect it would have on us.
How dumb had I been?
“No. Don’t be like that, Lauren. I want to stay in touch. I love you, and I’m doing this for both of us.”
Enraged at his declaration of love, I raged, “You’re doing this for yourself. You want to go to the city without being tied down by a girlfriend. You want to…” My mouth quivered. “S-Sleep around without feeling guilty.”
He blinked at me, and I could tell I’d hurt him. “You don’t believe that, do you?” he asked softly.
But it was all I could believe. Why else would he toss something like this away?
Why else would he give up on a love like ours?
“I do.” I jerked my chin up in the air in rejection of anything else he had to say. “Get out.”
When he made to step forward, to come to me, I threw my palette at him.
It missed by a mile—sports had never exactly been my strong suit—but he got the picture. He stared down at the blur of colors suddenly staining my rug, then closed his eyes. “I’ll see you around campus. But I’ll be leaving in two weeks after I’ve worked off my notices at the coffee shop.”
“Good for you,” I sneered, hating that I’d been thinking about organizing a ‘going away’ party at the coffee shop—the one job he’d actually enjoyed. The job had done more to help him figure out the human race than three years of psychology classes.