“I think you should stick to your phone art, babe. You don’t know women as well as I do.” He pointed at Seamus. “I appreciate the fact that you even jokingly proposed to someone who isn’t in some kind of trouble.” He narrowed his eyes. “She’s not right? This wasn’t a rescue proposal or anything? She doesn’t need a green card to escape the country?”
Seamus glared at him in answer.
“You heard the same thing I did, right, Jeremy? He likes her. That is the wrong L-word for marriage. I like sleeping in on my days off. I like pizza.”
Jeremy raised an eyebrow and covered his smile by rubbing his beard. “You more than like pizza, Owen. Let’s be honest. If it was legal to marry one of those meat pies, I’d have had competition.”
Owen wouldn’t be distracted. “He hasn’t even tried to sleep with her. And he’s hanging around with us while that the sultan of sex appeal over there flirts with his girl. No one else is seeing a problem with that?”
“He’s also sitting right here,” Seamus warned darkly.
“Then you tell me, Seamus.” Owen’s expression was genuinely mystified. “If you’re serious about this woman, why don’t I believe it? You’re a Finn, man. Where’s the fire?”
His brother winced and Seamus knew he was regretting the way that had come out, if not the sentiment. “I’m not like you, Owen. You’ve always jumped into everything with both feet and no fear. That’s what made you unstoppable on the football field and irresistible with the ladies, and it’s how you started a successful company as soon as that diploma was in your hand. But some of us need time to think things through. And in your own experience,” he added pointedly, “sometimes sexual attraction shows up after an emotional connection.”
He took a quick drink to calm his ire and then continued, “Gill and I built a friendship online that I don’t want to lose by moving too fast. And I’m not punching the pompous playboy over there because this is her place of business and I respect her family.”
“But what about—”
“Sex?” Seamus held up his hand. “Of course I want sex, Owen. But I’m a grown up and can, on occasion, think with something other than my dick. And what I think is that maybe what I’m looking for is better for me. Something solid and lasting, that isn’t always unpredictable and doesn’t consume all the oxygen in the room. I like Gillian. A lot. I can see her in my life. With my children. I know that doesn’t sound fiery enough for you, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be good.”
Owen opened his mouth to keep arguing, but Jeremy stopped him with a hand on his arm. “Whatever it is you need to be happy, Seamus, that’s what we want you to have.” He glanced back down the bar and shook his head. “If you like her, I’m betting she’s too smart to fall for that perfect camouflage anyway. That’s probably why he keeps looking over here. He knows you’re a threat.”
Bellamy was more of a threat to the future Seamus had envisioned for himself than anything else. He couldn’t give in to this sudden, unreasonable attraction for a gay fling right when the perfect woman was within his reach. He might never find someone like Gillian again. He might never have the time or inclination to try.
He might end up alone.
Owen swore and grabbed Jeremy’s hand, pulling him abruptly off of his bar stool. “I need to borrow my husband for a minute, Seamus. I’m sure you understand. We’ll be back after I remind him who he belongs to.”
“Owen—damn it.” Here? He was probably taking Jeremy to the bathroom for a quickie. Seamus should be used to it by now. No one around them could deny that what they had was fiery and passionate. But, whether Owen wanted to admit it or not, the years of friendship and trust that had come before it made that intensity possible. Made it last. Most people went a lifetime without feeling something like that.
Seamus actually felt like a fraud after his anti-fire speech. He gave advice to the lovelorn in his family all the time, but when it came to his own love life? Of course he wanted sex and fire. Of course he wanted what everyone else had. But he had no idea how to get it, let alone what to do with it when he did.
You felt it with Bellamy.
That was too much. If a few hot glances had put him in this state, all that could come from anything more was scorched earth and regret.
Sometimes it seemed as if his life were on backwards and inside out. He had four children, but he’d never been in love. Not really. Sadly, his friendship with Toby was the closest he’d come; only he hadn’t realized it at the time. He wasn’t good at reading signals with women and his experience with sex had been… Well, it hadn’t been earth shattering, but it hadn’t been so awful he didn’t want to try it again. Admittedly that was based off a very small sampling.