‘I suspected as much,’ he breathed. ‘How much did you hear of my conversation with my mother, Kat?’
She looked back at Zafir and pain scored her insides. She backed away further. He was too close. ‘I heard enough,’ she said painfully. ‘I didn’t stick around to hear you agree with her assessment that I’m entirely unsuitable.’
A flush stained Zafir’s cheeks. ‘Dammit, Kat, you are not unsuitable.’ Then he stopped. ‘You didn’t hear what I said to her?’
You are not unsuitable.
She cursed her silly heart for leaping at that. Kat wanted to look anywhere but at him, but she couldn’t look away. He was like the sun—blinding and devastating.
She lifted her chin. ‘No. I told you. I’d heard enough.’
‘So you didn’t hear me tell her that I’ve no intention of letting you go anywhere?’
She just looked at Zafir, her brain moving sluggishly. A tangled mass of sensations roiled in her gut, but worst of all was a kernel of something that felt awfully like hope.
Kat refused to give in to it. ‘Why would you want to keep me here? Our liaison is over.’
Zafir stepped closer to her, his eyes intense. ‘Is it?’
Kat felt flustered. ‘Well, of course it is. It was never going to last beyond this job, and you couldn’t have made it more clear after our conversation yesterday that whatever was there is gone...’ Kat was breathing jaggedly and tried to compose herself.
Zafir grimaced. ‘When I found out about my father... Kat, it was a huge shock. It made me realise how badly I’d judged you...how badly I’d disrupted your life. But it hasn’t changed how much I want you. Do you know how hard it was for me not to touch you last night?’
His words were like a punch in the gut. She breathed, ‘So you were there...’
He frowned. ‘Of course I was—who else would it have been?’
Kat shook her head and muttered, ‘I thought it was a dream.’
She took another step back, putting her arms around herself. ‘So...yo
u’re saying you still...’ She trailed off.
Zafir nodded and his mouth compressed. ‘I don’t think I’ll ever not want you, Kat.’
Something painful gripped her insides. ‘So what are you suggesting, Zafir? Are you going to lock me in your harem and make a carnal visit when you feel the urge, while you marry your suitable bride and have a legion of heirs?’
‘What are you talking about? There’s no such thing as a harem here and there hasn’t been for years.’
Mortified, because she was giving herself away spectacularly, she looked away, wishing she had something to hold on to. ‘Forget it.’
Zafir came close and put a hand to her chin, forcing her to look at him. He had a fierce light in his eye. ‘Do you really think that I would want to set you up as my mistress?’
She swallowed. ‘I don’t know what to think any more.’
Zafir shook his head. ‘I don’t want a mistress, Kat. I want a wife—a Queen.’
The pain was excruciating. She pulled away from Zafir and somehow managed to say, ‘And that’s what you deserve. I’m sure you’ll choose the perfect Queen.’
Zafir folded his arms. His eyes were like laser beams now. ‘I’ve already chosen her.’
Kat looked at him and felt a surge of jealousy at the thought of this mystery woman. ‘Then how can you not let me go? I can’t be here now—it’s unconscionable.’
Zafir shook his head. ‘It’s very conscionable, actually, because I want you to be my Queen, Kat. And that’s what I told my mother—before I told her to get out of my sight and that I wanted her gone from Jandor within a week. She’s no longer welcome.’
Kat shook her head. Something was happening inside her...something was cracking open... But she couldn’t let it. There was too much at stake, too much not yet said. Too much had happened in the past. There had been too much hurt.
‘You wanted to make me your Queen before, so what’s changed, Zafir? Is it the fact that the truth of my history is a little more palatable? Or is it because you feel guilty that your father interfered? It doesn’t change the fact that I did keep things from you. I’m just as guilty for what happened.’