I was not relaxing until I had us on that plane. No, scratch that; I was not relaxing until we were on home soil and even then I’d only relax marginally. I didn’t have a clue when I’d have some actual peace again. After the car brought us to the airport and the chauffeur helped us get our luggage checked I took my carry-on and took her by the hand and headed to where we needed to go. I glanced at her for the first time since leaving once we got to the counter for the airline and immediately took in that her face was ghostly. She was freaked right the fuck out. I guess I’d been stuck in my own head for the drive to the airport.
“Hey?”
She didn’t notice.
“Felicia?”
Her attention snapped to me and it dawned then that this was the first time she’d left that hellhole in 2 years. She probably wasn’t used to a moving car. She probably wasn’t used to the people everywhere in the busy airport. She was also likely deathly afraid she’d wake up back in that prison finding out that getting outta there was just a dream. She was probably afraid of me, too, afraid that I was just another abuser in a long line of people who’d mistreated her in the past 2 years.
“It’s okay. You okay?” I touched her face and she leaned into my palm and closed her eyes and nodded slowly. She seemed a bit wobbly so I got her to a chair and sat beside her, holding her hand in mine and rhythmically stroking it.
“Want something to drink?” I asked.
She shook her head, “I’m okay. I have a bit of motion sickness, I think. From the car ride, and from…” she stopped.
“All the excitement?” I offered.
She nodded a little.
I gave her hand a squeeze, “Stay here. I’ll deal with things at the counter and then we’ll get to the first class lounge. Eighteen hours we are not sitting like sardines in coach.”
I gave her a smile and then went back to the counter.
The flight was long. It was gonna be long no matter what but this was extra long because she was not good company. She was trying to be an angel, to behave exactly the right way but she was like a frog in a blender. She was emotional and she was trying to hide it but failing, miserably. Jiggling with nervous energy, trembling, being jumpy, clearly overwhelmed at the sights and sounds all around us. I wasn’t breaking any news to her until we were home. It didn’t feel safe.
Rafe Ruiz had included a sedative for her in with the travel documents but I’d flushed it. Maybe I should’ve given it to her.
We watched movies, we slept. At one point she settled down and slept and her head nodded and drifted to my shoulder and I got a pang of something, something fiercely protective. I let her stay there. I played chess on my iPad and then when she woke up I offered it to her so she could play games on it while I slept a bit.
When we finally arrived I led her to my SUV, which I’d had dropped off for us. I had no idea what she’d be like when I’d made all my travel plans so I’d done it that way on purpose, trying to keep a low profile, even though I was really too zonked to be driving.
** ** **
“My place isn’t fancy,” I told her almost apologetically as we got into the elevator from the underground garage, mostly to break that awkward elevator silence, the silence I’d been experiencing for the better part of three days with her, only now it was worse, it was ominous, it was like her fear was palpable.
“My brother bought it ten years ago, his first place, but when he moved to a big house I took it over. It’s close to my office,” I shrugged.
I knew she’d been told I was wealthy and powerful, that I came from an important and influential family. I also knew that the resort was luxurious. The place had been five stars
, lavish. My place was nice but it wasn’t exactly luxurious. It was a typical upper-middle class 2 bedroom condo in a nice building. She smiled without reaction with her mouth, not her whole face.
“I’ll get you up and settled and then get our things tomorrow.” I didn’t want to bring anything into the apartment in case it was bugged.
I noticed her chest was heaving, she was almost panting. She was looking like she wanted out of her skin. I sent a quick text to my brother to say I was home. The elevator stopped on the tenth floor and the door opened and I waved her ahead. My condo was at the end of the hall. I unlocked the door and as I walked down the hall, her following, I sent a text to Zack to ask if the apartment had been swept today. I motioned ahead and she walked in ahead of me and stood frozen in her tracks just three feet inside the door.
I stepped in, stepped around her, disarmed the alarm, and then dropped my keys on the table by the door. I looked in front of me at the view she was taking in.
It was an open concept condo. Big marble island in between the kitchen and living area with pub style chairs with leather backs, stainless steel appliances, brown and cream marble counters with cream kitchen cabinets. Large family room with two brown soft leather sofas facing each other and a glass coffee table between them with an 80” TV over a white brick fireplace. The walls were a chocolate brown with cream trim. The floors were dark hardwood. The apartment had no dining room table. The living area was big enough it could be a combo but I usually ate at the island and didn’t have a lot of company so there’d been no need. It had a large master bedroom and a good-sized second bedroom that I used as a den. I had a decent-sized terrace with doors from the living area and from the master bedroom that led to it. It had a good view of downtown. The den had a desk, my Bowflex, a few arcade games I’d claimed when Tommy sold his place, and a futon in it for the odd time someone crashed here.
I figured I’d crash in the den tonight and let her have my room and then tomorrow we’d start to figure out the rest. Now, despite the long flight and a burning desire for a hot shower and sleep, I wanted to talk to her, get this over with. I got a reply from Tommy who acknowledged my, “I’m home. Exhausted. I’ll msg you tomorrow.” with a quick reply.
I dropped my phone on the island and opened the fridge. There was a note magneted to it by a frame containing a picture of my twin nieces eating from a big double layer birthday chocolate cake with their fingers, chocolate all over their faces. The note was from Sarah, our family housekeeper, she was a nanny to me and my siblings when we were kids. She now bounced between my house and the girls’ houses. It said she’d done groceries for me and she’d see me Monday. She had totally stocked my fridge. I’d told her before I left to stock extra and she took that seriously, for sure. She’d asked questions but all I told her was that I might have a houseguest for a bit. I grabbed two bottles of water and passed Felicia one. She was still standing near the door, holding a handbag, and looking pale and lost.
“Sit,” I said, motioning to a sofa, “We need to talk.”
She sat on a sofa hesitantly. My text alert went off and Zack confirmed he’d been at my condo and left just as he watched me pull into the parking garage.
“Let me see your bag, please?”