“Rosie?”
Tony stalks me, stopping so close I’m forced to look up at him. Heat and anger emanating off him in waves that burn as they flow over me. “She's fine. Right where she belongs upstairs in her room.”
“I'm sorry.” I don't know what else to say. All the other things I planned are frozen in my throat. Again the need to touch him fills me, except I don’t dare afraid I’ll be burned by the fire in him.
Shaking his head, he does the exhale laughing thing. I can't take my eyes off him. He's gained new lines over the five years, and pain stabs me because I know it’s from what I did. A thin beard covers his face. I hate the way it covers him up.
“I was coming back. I knew I needed to come back,” I push the words out.
“Rosie mentioned that.” Why does it seem to make him angrier? His eyes flick over me.
I’m wearing a black wrap dress he once tore off me for being too sexy. I’d loved him doing it and had the small tear at the zipper fixed but hadn’t worn it again before I left. There is no doubt he remembers the dress. I’m also sure he knows I wore it, as a way of reminding him of the desire I pray he still feels for me. The dress is a little tighter, my body has changed since having Rosie. I wonder what he thinks of it.
“How many men have touched you? Did you allow someone to touch what is mine?” he growls low in his throat. His hand goes around my wrist as he spots the ring on my finger. The ring I’ve kept all these years, never taking it off when I knew I should.
Thank god, he’s jealous. It sends a thrill through me. “No one. You're the only one I ever wanted.” Something flickers in his eyes, and pain sharp and bright, hits me. “You can't say the same.”
He drops my hand. “No, I can't. There have been so many women I lost count. Lisa, for one.”
I blink back tears I don’t have the right to shed. Tony didn’t cheat on me. I walked away. If I hadn’t left; he never would have touched another woman. His loyalty was never in doubt. This pain is no one’s fault but my own. Yet I reel away from him, not wanting him to see the tears.
Tony’s hand is on my arm, forcing me back to him. “But none of them were you. I closed my eyes and tried to pretend, but none of them were you.”
His hand wraps around my hair pulling it back hard, forcing my eyes to his. God, I'm so messed up. I'm aching, longing for him. Even though his touch is punishing, filled with anger. And I shouldn't respond to it; it shouldn't turn me on—it does.
“They whimpered, the way you did. Pleaded for more, just like you. But none of them were you, and I hated them for it. And I hated you even more for wanting them to be you when you fucking walked away from me.” He brings his mouth so close to mine, I breathe him in. He doesn’t kiss me the way I need him to.
Rough hands slide under my dress, tearing my panties off. I’m ashamed of how wet they are. He chuckles darkly as he brings them up to his face. “I was starving, and I fed, but I never got full. And I hated you more with every woman I fucked. You felt it, didn’t you? At the darkest hours of night when I laid there craving you, hard for you?”
I nod, blinking the tears fall all over again.
“You felt it, and you knew, fucking knew with every damn cell in your body that you belonged with me and you never came back. You let me burn for you, let me lay there sleepless with your ghost in my bed.” He shakes his head and lets me go so suddenly I stumble, my legs unable to hold me up. I land on my ass with a painful thump.
Damn it. The repair wasn’t as good as I thought, the dress pops open. Tony’s eyes run over me and before I blink, he’s over me. A rough hand opens the front clasp of my bra and I’m naked. A growl comes out of him as his mouth covers my breast. His mouth brings a chaotic rush of pleasure and pain.
“No, Tony, please. Not like this,” I beg him. I don’t want our first time after all these years to be like this, angry and bitter.
“Not like this? How else do you think it could be? What else do you think you deserve?” He enters me in one stroke, slamming deep inside me. God, it hurts. It's been so long. So very long and he’s so big. The pain is immense. Yet we both moan lost in the pleasure—the ache at long last soothed.
Tony is wild in a way he's never been before, and it scares me. “Please, please,” I whisper. I don’t even know what I’m asking for.
He says nothing as his mouth takes mine, demanding everything. I give up to him. I can't deny him. Too soon, the orgasm explodes inside me, tearing me apart piece by tiny piece. It’s back all over again, the need to melt into him, to crawl into his skin and never leave.
The hot rush of him coming, filling me full of him shocks me even as it carries me back under the tide of pleasure all over again. Tony pulls out of me while I’m still trembling, leaving me gasping at the loss of him. All I can do is watch as he does up his pants, and I realize he hadn't even unbuttoned his shirt.
Staring down at me, he shakes his head. “Damn you.” The words are bitter. I close my eyes. When I open them, he’s gone.
***
Tony
Staring down at Christy, the bit
terness is still there, filling me until I can barely breathe through it. I walk away while I still can. Before I fuck up beyond what I already have.
I go to my car. But as I slam into it, all I can do is sit there. I’m too afraid to drive away from her, to leave her again. I know she's not going anywhere. Even though this time I deserve her leaving.
What had I done? It didn't matter she came in the end. I've never forced a woman before, ever. Not like that. Shame threatens to consume me. For five long years, I dreamed of her every night and the moment I touch her again, I hurt her. Dominic warned me, and I still fucked up.