“I hate you.” The words slip out even though I don’t mean them. I hate the way he’s hurting me and I still love him.
“I don’t give a fuck if you hate me or not. You have exactly three seconds to decide if you walk down or I carry you. Which is it?”
When I try to pull away, his grip tightens in warning until it borders on pain. Head down, I move to the door. He lets me go when we get to the stairs. With every step the anger in him intensifies, until for the first time he scares me a little.
I’m so tense I stumble as we get to the last set of stairs. The fear of the pain coming plunges my stomach through the floor. Only it doesn’t happen: Ivan has ahold of me. His arms are bands of iron wrapped around my waist so tight I can barely breathe. We’re both breathing heavily. His chest moves in great big gulps.
“What the fuck is the matter with you? Do you hate me so much you would hurt yourself to get away from me?” Gravel, hard and hot, hits me.
He doesn’t give me a second to answer before his mouth is on mine, heavy and punishing. He’s bruising my lips, but I don’t care. I’m in his arms and he’s not pushing me away.
From far away I hear a high, piercing whistle. “Damn, Ivan, let the poor woman breathe.”
Oh god, I bury my face in his chest.
His chuckle is forced. “She can breathe just fine, Hannah.”
We’re moving again, he keeps an arm tight around my waist. He’s basically carrying me down the stairs. I glance down to see Hannah grinning up at me.
She’s so pretty. Long dark hair curls down her back; she has a heart-shaped face and a cute button nose over a wide mouth. I’ve seen pictures of her in Ivan’s home, the only place he had them was in his home office. In person there’s a certain charisma that draws you to her—it’s the only thing she has in common with Ivan. Well, that and her height. She’s at least five nine, maybe taller.
I’m barely off the stairs before she hugs me tight. “I’m so glad to finally meet you. I am so so sorry about the mess with Mum. I promise, Gemma and I are normal, well, most of the time.” She pauses. “Enough to pass for normal, anyway.”
I don’t hesitate to hug her back. “Please do not apologize, you aren’t responsible for her. What she’s done to all of you is awful enough. You said she’s done this before?”
“Yeah, a couple of times. When my dad came out of prison after he did his five years, she welcomed him with open arms. Ivan left the same day so she scratched her wrists up with glass. It was ridiculous, she was barely bleeding. Then when Ivan cut off her allowance she did the pills thing, which is what she did this time. After making sure she told everyone what she was doing, to make sure we got her to hospital in time.”
Hannah sighs. “She set herself up this time, they’re holding her for twenty-eight days. She practically lost it when they told her. Missing the chance to make a scene at the weddings has her throwing fits so badly they sedated her. Welcome to the family.” Her smile is wide and fake. “Sorry.”
“Stop saying you’re sorry. The last thing you should feel is bad about all of this. It’s her, it has nothing to do with any of you. I just feel awful walking into the middle of it.”
Ivan’s hand goes around my arm, pulling me around to him. “What are you talking about?”
Is he mad I’m talking badly about his mother? “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude. I can’t help it. It was selfish and cruel of her, to you for making it seem like your fault, to Gemma for doing this right before her big day, and to Hannah because despite her knowing her mom’s a drama queen, it still hurts when someone you love, however vaguely, almost dies.”
His frown isn’t of anger, it’s of confusion. But before he says anything, a different maid announces dinner is ready.
“I’m starving,” Hannah moans. “Gemma is with Aari, poor thing is down with a migraine. Don’t worry, though, she’ll be here tomorrow bright and early for the setup for dinner.” Seeing my confusion, she adds, “Ivan didn’t tell you? Tomorrow the first big family meeting happens here. Aari’s grandparents are coming in from Mumbai, his dad’s parents. His mum’s are here in Manchester. Gemma’s frantic, they got here today, this afternoon. She and Aari were supposed to meet them at the airport, but they both completely forgot. Aari’s dad flipped.”
“Poor thing. Is there anything I can do?” The words are barely out of my mouth before I realize how stupid they sound. What could I possibly do to help? But I’m willing to do anything they ask.
Hannah stops. “You are...” She looks to Ivan. “I’m not sure you deserve her, my dear brother.” Then to me: “We have it almost under control. Keep Ivan happy so he doesn’t do the glaring, frowning thing and that will be more than enough. Aari’s dad is excited to meet him. People who get excited to meet him annoy Ivan, as I’m sure you know.”
I nod. “Yes, I don’t understand why he doesn’t take it as the compliment it is.”
We enter a dining room so large it’s hard to take it all in. The table could hold at least forty people, and it’s set as if there were going to be forty people. There are three crystal chandeliers running the length the room, more gleaming wood, and china I’m a little afraid to use. Ivan holds out a chair for me beside him.
“You know what I do not like? Being spoken about as if I am not in the room.”
Hannah’s eyes meet mine and we laugh.
Ivan frowns.
“The list of your dislikes is nearly endless,” Hannah teases him.
“Maybe, but I know of several of his likes,” Mishka says with innuendo as she sits down beside Hannah.
Rolling her eyes, “You wish. Christina, this is Mishka, Aari’s little sister. She’s staying for the next few weeks until the weddings are over.”