Of course that was what this was about. After what happened during that intimate moment Julian interrupted, Colton was probably regretting anything that pulled them closer. At least he had waited until she was recuperating before he reminded her.
She struggled to pull an apologetic grin. And if it came out more like a grimace? She’d tried.
“I know. And, I swear, I’m still working on it. Things have just been so… so hectic lately.”
“I’m not talking about that,” rumbled Colt. “Well, I am. But it’s because I’m trying to tell you that I’m fucking grateful that you weren’t able to do that. You’re my mate, Shea. It’s about time I really start acting like it. And not just the good times, like what was happening between us before the Nightwalker ruined it. I want you for all of it.”
Shea had to be hearing things. No way her bottled-up, grumpy wolf had just said—
She gulped. “What exactly are you telling me?”
“Just what I said. This bond—it’s mine. Ours. I don’t want anything to happen to it. I want to finalize it. Get that stupid piece of paper signed and notarized, follow every Alpha damned letter of the stupid Claws Clause. Fuck the Nightwalker. If the laws say you're mine as much as I do, he could suck blood from some other healer. I won’t let him have you.”
“You don’t mean that.”
“I don’t?” He gestured to the edge of her bed. “Can I sit here?”
That might’ve been the first time Colton actually asked her permission of something instead of just demanding. So shocked, and still half out of it, she couldn’t do anything but nod.
“Thanks.” He lowered his gorgeous ass, resting his side against her hip. His hand shot out to cover hers. “I’m a fucking moron, Shea. I want to just put that out there now. Fate gave me the best mate for me and I was too blinded by the color of your eyes and what it meant to realize that I was drowning in them. I’ve tried to tell you this before, but you didn’t believe me. Fair enough. I never gave you a reason to. But then I almost lost you...” He squeezed her hand. “I finally understand why Mad spent three years in the Cage. If you left me, I’d gut anyone who tried to take away my memories of our short time together. Not that that’s gonna happen. I don’t want these last few weeks to be all we had together. Shit, Shea, I want to make so many more memories. I want forever with you. I want you to be my mate.”
He’d said the same thing to her that day in her shop.
Only this time? This time she was actually hearing what he was saying—and what he wasn’t.
“Colt. What’s come over you? If this is still just because you want something that someone else has, that’s childish bullshit.” She pulled her hand away. “I don’t want Julian. He tricked me with the first blood exchange, forced me for the second. Believe me, there won’t be a third.”
A growl started low in his throat. His blue eyes went arctic. “You’re fucking right there won’t be. The only one who’ll be exchanging anything with you is me.”
Once again, an expression that would have any sane woman heading for the hills, made Shea’s panties go damp.
Too bad she was in a hospital bed, as weak as a kitten, or she might have been tempted to take him up on his offer.
“Colt—”
“You almost died. You almost sacrificed your life to heal your brother. Don’t deny it, either. I was there. I held you as you grew cold. It nearly broke me. I wanted to give you time. Give you your space. I will if that’s what you need from me, but I’m not pussyfooting around anymore. You need to know how I feel. To be honest, I don’t want you for any other reason that I’m a selfish asshole. It’s not that I don’t want to live without you. I finally realized I can’t.”
Then, as if he’d finally heard what he was saying, understood that he had made a whole lot of assumptions during his speech, Colton cleared his throat. “I mean. If you’ll have me.”
“I… I don’t know.”
He looked at her closely. “How are your shields?”
“Um… better? I think.”
“And the wards? They’re still protecting you from the rest of the hospital?”
Shea nodded. She had no idea where Colton was going with this, but she nodded anyway.
“Good. Like I told your grandmother, I’m not so good at telling you how I feel. It never comes out right. But”—Colton dropped his guards—“maybe I can show you another way. We have this bond. It’s about fucking time I use it.”
His emotions traveled down his end of the bond straight to her heart. For the first time, she got slammed with the full blast of his feelings for her.
They were, uh, pretty intense.
Love.
Lust.