After she took off, I expected Cole to jump my bones, or at least joke about finding a service room close to the cafeteria.
“What were you two talking about?”
“One of our childhood friends got married, and we were looking at pictures, remembering some shenanigans we did as kids.” I half turned to him. He took both my hands in his, holding them together.
“When you said it makes you nervous... you meant the wedding?”
I bit my lip. “I don’t—”
He shook his head, bringing my hands to his mouth, kissing them.
“Laney, wait, I want to get something off my chest. I’d planned to wait a while before saying this, but the longer I wait, the more it weighs on me.” He squeezed my hands a little tighter, looking straight at me. There was a lump in my throat. Even if I wanted to talk, I couldn’t. “I absolutely don’t want to put you on the spot. I know you have a big surgery you need to focus on. This isn’t an ultimatum or anything, but I want you to know that—” His voice was uneven. I squeezed his hands right back, holding them tightly. “—I feel very deeply about you. I fell hard and very fast, and I wouldn’t change one thing about that. You’ve become a huge part of my life these past months. I think I started to really fall for you when Skye had that scare and we brought her here. And yes, I’m aware how crazy that is. The closer we’ve grown, the more I’ve imagined how our lives could be in a few months, then a few years... I have a very vivid painting in my mind. Very detailed. I want—” His voice broke. He took in a deep breath. “I know you said that you dream about certain things, but you’re also afraid of that. I just want to know if you think there is a possibility you might want the same things I do. If not now, then at some point.” He grinned, but his eyes were still full of emotion. “In the not-so-distant future. My deepest fear is that you won’t, and I... I just want you to think about it.”
“Cole, I love you
—"
He shook his head and pressed two fingers over my lips.
“Don’t say anything now. I want you to think about it. Really think about it, okay?”
My throat was still clogged and feeling as if I had a stone at the base of it.
I started to nod when Magda, the cafeteria manager, called out. “Miss Laney, what do you think you’re doing? Your shift is starting.”
A fraction of a second later, my pager beeped. Cole got to his feet. I wanted to tell him to sit back down, or even better, go with him. He just kissed my forehead and whispered, “Good luck with the surgery,” before leaving.
I didn’t want to go to my stupid shift at all! I wanted to go after Cole.
“Missy, don’t choose today of all days to be late. Chief has asked you to go into surgery with him.”
“Oh, give me a break, Magda. I know.”
She jerked her head back, looking after the door Cole just walked through.
“Young women these days,” Magda muttered, loud enough for me to hear her. Most residents were more afraid of Magda than the chief. She was the unofficial hospital policeman, making sure no one was slacking (as if). I was all jittery, and my stomach rolled as if I was about to be sick.
Cole, Cole, Cole!
This was far too short notice to switch shifts, but on a regular day, I’d ask one of my interns to do the initial checkup round for me. Today of all days, I had surgery first thing, and with the chief, no less. There was no way I could get out of the hospital right now. God damn it, I’d never ever wanted to leave it so badly.
With a sinking feeling in my belly, I speed walked to the surgical unit, barely able to focus on the upcoming task. This was a complicated surgery, and I needed to be sharp. It would last at least three hours.
But my mind kept bringing my amazing, funny man to the forefront. My very brave man who’d just bared all his emotions to me. I hadn’t been prepared for all his beautiful words. They touched me so deeply that my eyes were misty. What exactly was I going to tell him when I saw him, besides how much I loved him?
Chapter Twenty-Six
Cole
I left the hospital thinking I could just bury myself in work and get my mind off everything, but one block later, it became clear that I was in no mood for the office, clients, or deadlines. No, I needed my family.
Taking out my phone, I called Tess.
“I need company,” I said the second she picked up.
“Right now or tonight?”
“Right now.”