“Wait, he came inside you?” His eyes widen.
I swallow needing to face my fears. “Yes, he came. He was close to coming again when you stopped him.”
His eyes drop to my body like he’s seeing me for the first time. He notices the tiny scars still on my breasts where he bit me. And he sees my sex that is no longer mine. It’s Armas’.
I don’t think I can ever have sex again. It hurts to think about it.
I touch his face because he looks like he needs comforting. His somber eyes come back to mine.
“What do you need?”
I shrug. “I don’t know.”
“Come on. There has to be something I can do to help. Bring you ice cream, take you to a movie, give you a massage. Something to help.”
The word leaves my mouth without understanding what I want myself. “You.”
His face juts back like he doesn’t believe what I said.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it…”
I grab the covers to cover myself up along with the embarrassment. His hand pushes them down before he grabs my chin and turns it toward him.
“You meant what you said.”
I nod.
“You want me to make the memories go away?”
“Yes, it’s stupid. It probably won’t even work. You can’t make the memories go away. You can’t replace them. I don’t even think if I was in love with you could you make the memories go away.”
“I can make the nightmares go away.” He says it like he believes what he is saying, and it almost makes me believe him.
I glance down at his rippling chest, preventing my eyes from going lower. I can feel him grinning at me.
“And you can’t deny you want a taste of my body. What hurt would it do to try?”
I swallow. A lot. If it feels like he’s raping me, instead of pleasuring me, I’m not sure how I will survive. I’ll die of insanity if I have to deal with both Armas and Matteo haunting me. Matteo has done some bad things, but nothing like Armas. This could make it worse.
He sighs and starts to get up sensing my hesitation. He’s going to leave me alone with my nightmares. I can’t handle that.
I grab his neck and pull him to me, kissing him firmly on the lips. His mouth tastes delicious, and he smells heavenly like a musky soap he used in the shower. I pull away, gently trying to give my brain time to think, because there is no way I’m going to be getting any thinking done with my lips locked with his.
I keep my eyes closed as I rest my forehead against his. “I want you. Fuck me, make me forget. I trust you, don’t lose that trust. It might be the only way you have a chance to get Nina back.”
He exhales like he’s judging my words.
“Promise me you won’t hurt me. You won’t rape me. If I say stop, you’ll stop.”
I open my eyes to wait for his response, needing to see his eyes as he says it.
He doesn’t say anything. Instead, he grabs my neck and kisses me again profoundly. His tongue sweeps into my mouth, and I forget about waiting for him to promise not to hurt me. I just feel. His tongue dancing with mine as our lips and moans collide.
He pushes me back as he climbs on top of me, our lips still locked together. I close my eyes and immediately realize it’s a mistake.
“Stay with me, pretty girl,” he moans against my lips. “I don’t want you crediting someone else with my sexy moves.”
He grins against my lips as he says it and I open my eyes, smiling a little back.