‘It’s your turn,’ I say. ‘What happened five years ago?’
CHAPTER EIGHT
HER EYES ARE fixed on mine. She’s not going to let it go.
It wasn’t as if I’d tried to kiss her to make her forget. Honest. Although it would have been preferable to this.
I place my beer on the table and rake my hands through my hair. I don’t owe Nate anything. And yet talking about it doesn’t come easy. Last time I spoke up I lost the entire family. Her father pushed me out and told me I’d failed them, failed Nate. He was angry, but his words stung. More than he can possibly know.
And how would she take it—the same way?
I meet her determined gaze and realise it doesn’t matter how she reacts. She isn’t going to let it rest until she knows. And I have nothing to be ashamed of.
Nothing.
Not that her father saw it that way.
‘Well?’ She tucks her legs tight beneath her, the challenge in her eyes bright. It beats tears. They knotted up my insides, crushed me with guilt.
I speak over the painful reminder. ‘You know what your brother was like growing up: outgoing, a people-pleaser, a constant beam of optimism?’
She frowns at me, but nods. I know she’s comparing how he was to the man he is now, as she’s just described him to me.
‘He was also hot-headed, excitable—he would always act first, think later, if it meant he could lead the way with whatever had caught his eye.’
I take up my beer for a swig and let the memories in.
‘He definitely did that when it came to women.’ I can almost laugh at that. ‘We had some seriously fun times...and some fallouts. But it was the same in business too, and together we worked. So long as I was there, watching his back, and so long as he listened to me we were okay, the business was okay. He was the go-getter and I was the level-headed one, doing the research and giving final approval.’
‘Yeah, I know. Dad made some sweeping comment not long after it all came crashing down, referring to you both as yin and yang, the perfect system...until you went AWOL.’
‘I didn’t go AWOL.’ It comes through gritted teeth, and I see my anger surprises her. ‘I left after your brother went too far with one of his schemes. He’d been pulled in by a woman he was dating. She’d convinced him this product they were working on was the next big thing—that they just needed enough investment and it would make us all billions.’
I laugh bitterly now, as I remember the conversation, the stupidity of it all.
‘I told him it was a bad investment, that we couldn’t risk it. We still had your father’s money to pay back and we were on track for that. A few months and we could have been clear—well on our way to making a small fortune. Of course, your brother wasn’t one for waiting, but I never thought for a second he would go ahead and do it without me. He lost it all. Bankrupted the company...lost your father’s money...left us with nothing.’
‘But...’ She’s staring at me as if she doesn’t believe a word. ‘I don’t understand. Why did you leave if it was all him?’
‘I was angry. I tried to speak to your father but Nate got there first—claimed I’d been on board, that he might have sourced the deal but I was with him on it.’
‘No, he wouldn’t lie like that.’
She’s shaking her head at me, but her voice is soft, lacking in conviction. Not that I care whether she believes me or not. Her father didn’t—why would she be any different?
‘Wouldn’t he? Nate was always trying to prove himself, to outperform all around him, to prove his worth to your father. Can you imagine what this did to him...? No, you don’t need to imagine—you know.’
‘But to lie...to blame you.’
‘I don’t think he realised at the time just how badly his accusation would land. He was just covering his back, protecting his position with your father.’
‘Fuck that, Lucas! You were kicked out because of this.’
I don’t need her sympathy or her anger. This is old news to me.
‘Your father chose to believe him. I tried to tell him but he wouldn’t listen. Ultimately I don’t think he cared. He just wanted to place the blame squarely on me.’ I take another swig of beer, douse the choking heat in my throat. ‘I wasn’t blood.’
‘But, Lucas...’ Her voice is whisper-soft. ‘You could’ve come to me—at least told me, explained...’