The second: I am so proud of you. You can do this, you sexy thing, you!
The third: Whoa, check out the Daddy in the background. I’ll work through anything to get to his fine ass.
My eyes widen as I read it and I have to take a look at the photo again. My heart pounds and my blood heats.
Kamden doesn’t hold back his laughter at my reaction to the sight of Zander in the background of the photo. The black shirt and jeans he was wearing that day aren’t doing him any justice as he stands in the corner of the background through the windowpane. His focus is ahead as he prepares to enter through the back door, so it’s a profile.
His stubbled jawline and the power that radiates off of him, even from just striding across the back patio, is sexy as fuck.
“I mean … they’re not wrong.”
A heat travels across the back of my neck. I’m not certain I can remain composed, so I down the cup of tea before I speak.
“They aren’t wrong,” I say, my tone less flippant this time.
“You going to start calling him ‘Daddy’ now? The term going around is ‘lover boy,’ just so you know.”
“Lover boy?” I can hardly get the words out considering the way my breath has been stolen. He’s my secret, my safe place. “I didn’t realize he was in the picture.”
“I think it was one of the last ones I took,” Kamden tells me, laying the phone on the table. “It’s been great for image. Everyone loves a scandal and even more than that, a romance.”
“What did you tell them?” My inquiry comes out more breathy than I’d like, but there isn’t an ounce of suspicion from Kam.
“The official statement from your estate is, ‘We are incredibly grateful for the professional guidance The Firm has offered during this time of healing.’”
“Professional.” I nod in agreement of his wording.
“If you remember, I’ve always been the professional one. It would be you who would have commented something like, ‘Yeah, but is he packing,’ along with the eggplant emoji.”
The laugh that bubbles up is genuine and given Kam’s reaction, the hints of worry diminish quickly enough.
“Now that’s a beautiful sound.” Damon’s comment comes from behind us and I turn to see him making his way over from the other side of the island. His kindness is never unnoticed. The man knows how to make me smile too. I appreciate it and I make sure to widen my grin when I meet his gaze.
“Just the man I wanted to see,” Kam pipes up. As the two of them have a quiet conversation, I assume about the comments Kam wants to show me referring to the second post and hopefully not the first, I busy myself with making another cup of tea.
My journal is next to the kettle. Flipping through the pages I find the last one, which I titled: What would please him most? It’s no coincidence I chose to use a hot pink gel pen for this page. The rest of it is blank.
Damon saw me staring at it this morning. I peek up at him as I wait for the kettle to whistle, and he and Kam are focused on Kam’s phone. Occasionally Damon nods.
He told me I was doing well. He said I should be careful not to rush things or judge my progress harshly.
A bad moment is not a bad day. Not being able to complete a task doesn’t mean failure.
Staring at this blank page, though, I’m not sure Zander will agree.
Zander
Each client of The Firm will receive regular evaluations to determine whether progress has been made toward their individualized care goals.
Ella’s hair is wet from the shower when I arrive for the night. I catch the scent of her shampoo the second I walk in the door, and it’s all I can do to listen to Damon as he recaps the day. He said it was a lighthearted day but those days worry him. After the highs come the dips, and oftentimes they can feel like falling back when they’re only natural.
Harrison once described it to me as a spiral staircase built against a wall. Even though we climb higher and higher, we still hit the wall. We must. It has to occur to move onward.
Making a mental note, I debate on whether or not I should carry through with my plan for tonight.
“Should I aim for an uneventful, quiet night then?”
Damon’s head shakes. “Take her lead. If she wants another long conversation, I wouldn’t avoid that. It may be necessary. You good?” he asks.
Nodding in agreement that it may be necessary, I continue the movement with my answer, “I’m good.”
I send him on his way and find Ella at the archway to the kitchen. I’m not sure where she was before, but she’s here now. “Hi,” she says softly. The cadence of her voice and the shyness in her posture already have me rock fucking hard.