With Wilson, I’m going to cry for a very different reason.
I’m going to cry because I can’t stand the thought of losing him.
“Sabrina,” he says, and he tilts my chin up. His eyes search mine, and yeah, he can tell that I’m about to start bawling like a baby. “I promise I will come back to you.”
And there they are.
The tears come hard and fast and ugly.
I start sobbing as I throw myself into his arms.
In my line of work, I have to be calm and collected 100% of the time. No matter what I’m doing, I have to be in control. When a patient comes into my office and shares a dark, terrible secret with me, I can’t react, or they’ll shut down emotionally. If someone comes in and admits they’re having an affair, I can’t have a negative response. If someone tells me they’re thinking about killing themselves, I can’t freak out.
But now, in this moment, I am absolutely, totally, and completely freaking out.
I’m totally losing myself.
And I don’t want to.
I don’t want to lose myself right now.
“Please,” I whisper, begging.
I’m not above begging.
Not for him.
“Sabrina, it’s going to be okay,” Reece says now. He comes up behind me and starts to rub my back. “I promise that everything is going to be fine.”
“This is something we have to do, love.”
“It’s for our clan, Sabrina,” Reece says, and I think it’s the first time I’ve heard him refer to Fablestone as his.
He always refers to it as “this place” or “the clan,” but he’s never used a word like “ours.” He’s never used that sort of possessive pronoun, and I turn around and look at him in surprise. Wilson seems to notice, too.
“That’s right, brother,” he says.
Reece nods and leans down to kiss me.
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he says. “But Sabrina, I hate to see you cry. I will stay with you the entire time they’re gone, okay? We’ll pass the time together.”
“Okay,” I nod, but I’m still not totally okay with this.
I’m not on board with the idea of one of my guys going away to a terrible place to fight terrible people who have done terrible things. Fablestone has suffered enough without us having to deal with this, too. I want to just be able to move forward from all the havoc Lucky has wreaked.
I don’t want to be stuck in a world where my boyfriend is going off to fight an impossible war.
I don’t want to live without him.
Chapter Twelve
Wilson
The single worst thing I’ve ever done in my life wasn’t picking on Benjamin Reynolds in the 4th grade.
It wasn’t losing my mind and getting angry at my clan when something out of their control shook my confidence.
It wasn’t even losing my hope when my wife passed away.