Then she nods and keeps on walking, pushing her stroller with her. I’m left looking after the woman for a minute before I continue on my way back to Henrietta’s house. It’s still hard for me to think of my little room as “home.” I have an upstairs bedroom with my own bathroom. There’s even a separate entrance, so when I need to come or go at a strange time, I’m able to do that. Henrietta might be a busy veterinarian, but she’s been more than welcoming to me. She didn’t have to give me a place tostay, but she did, and I’m thankful for that.
When I get to my room, I sit down on the bed and I stare at the space I’ve occupied for the last few months. This is what my life has come to: being alone in a room. Being caught up by myself without any friends, without a lover, without someone to call my partner.
Lying back on the bed, I try not to think about seeing Lee today. He came and saved me. He rescued me. He didn’t have to, but he was there.
He’s always been there, a little voice whispers to me, and it’s true.
I think about the time in school we found out about an essay that hadn’t been marked on the syllabus. Somehow, we’d both missed the professor talking about it until the week it was due. We were scrambling to make sense of the assignment, to prep our quotes, and to organize our thoughts well enough to complete research papers on short notice. We’d stayed up all night together. We wrote, we ate, and we bounced ideas off each other. We did that every night all week, and by the time Friday came around, we were both completely ready to turn in our work.
For me, it was the first time I’d really struggled to make sense of something in school, and I knew then, just as I know now, that I wouldn’t have been able to do it without Lee by my side. He had encouraged me every step of the way. He’d been patient with me, and kind.
More than that, he’d been understanding. We were both in the same boat. We both had to complete the same project, but he didn’t worry about himself. He just focused on helping me throughout the entire thing. It was a perfect gesture of selflessness, and when it comes right down to it, that’s who Lee has always been. He’s always been the guy who put others first. He’s always been the guy who cared more about helping other people than helping himself.
When we were in school, Lee never panicked when we came across a problem or an issue. I think that’s why it was so surprising that when I turned down his proposal, he just...left. He was gone. He was a part of my life one day and the next, he wasn’t. He was my partner and my joy, and then he was nothing. We were together.
Then we weren’t.
There was no closure for me. There was no chance for me to recover from what had happened, and in many ways, I wanted that. I wanted more than just a simple breaking of the relationship. I wanted something that let me know it wasn’t my fault. I suppose that in the end, it was my fault, and perhaps that’s part of the reason I never got that closure or that drawn-out goodbye with Lee.
It was all just so abrupt.
Kind of like today.
I don’t want the pain of living here to be something I’m never able to move past, but after today, maybe it makes sense that I just leave. Maybe I should wander off into the woods and just not come back. I could find a nice, quiet village to live in. I could find a place where nobody knows me.
I could find a place where I’ll be safe.
But what about Lee?
There’s a little part of me that sprung to life when I saw him today.
There’s a little piece of me that still holds hope.
If I walk away, I definitely won’t see him again.
Ever.
Is that something I can live with?
Chapter Four
Lee
Wilson arrives and lands just outside of the building. The ground shifts slightly when he lands in his dragon form. Wilson is big: one of the biggest dragons of Fablestone. It’s one of the reasons he’s the clan leader. If you ask him, he’ll plead up and down that he’s just good at his job, which is true, but there’s another part to his story, and it’s the fact that he’s enormous.
As the clan leader, he’s got a lot of responsibilities. That includes being the one to protect us and keep us safe. In order to do that, he has to be intimidating. Size has a lot to do with that. Attitude is another part.
Wilson’s Resting Bitch Face helps.
After he lands, he shifts and comes in, entering the wreckage of the bakery carefully. It’s all but been destroyed, but I won’t apologize for that. Not when someone’s life was in danger. Perhaps I should feel a little bad about destroying a Fablestone place of business, but in the heat of the moment, all that mattered was stopping Reece, which I did.
“What happened?” Wilson asks, looking from me to Reece and back again. He doesn’t sound angry or frustrated. He’s just resigned. He’s dealt with a lot of crap during his time as clan leader. To him, this is just one more day.
But it’s more than that.
At least, it should be.
To me, this is the day that I almost lost Nicole a second time.