"I decided to head down early so I can get a little work done. My room was too much of a distraction," I answered honestly. "Where are you headed?"
She grinned sheepishly. "I'm going to check out the Georgia Aquarium for a couple of hours. You want to come?"
I debated her question for a moment. If I went with her, it would help kill the morning before the signing, but it could also backfire if she continued to talk about Alec. "I better not. I've been a social media leper lately and I need to do some serious catching up. My notifications and messages on Facebook are pretty scary."
"Honey, I can completely relate. By the way, huge congratulations on Wicked Lovely! I told you that book would go big. It's your best work yet."
I blushed as the elevator doors opened, revealing a lobby full of people. "Thank you so much. And thank you for the blurb also." It helped to have a well known author provide a quote for the cover of the book.
"The honor was all mine. Are you sure you don't want to go check out some fish with me?"
I shook my head. "I better not. It's time I did a little work. Have fun though." I gave a little wave before heading toward the Starbucks.
"You too. Tell your hottie we miss him," she said, blowing a kiss at me.
My smile remained fixed until she walked out of the lobby. The moment she was out of sight, it dropped. In our short conversation I'd come to the conclusion that today was going to suck. Every single person who visited my table would expect to see Alec. I was going to have to field endless questions while smiling the entire time and pretending that my heart wasn't in shreds. Joy.
My foreshadowing proved to be dead on. By the time the signing ended later that evening, I was ready to stab myself in the eye with my Sharpie, which was too bad considering it had been a complete success. The event was bittersweet. The success of Wicked Lovely had brought me more attention than I had seen during the previous events. Even without Alec, readers still flocked to my table. Not that they weren't asking about him, which only made me miss him more. The anger I'd held on to the night before was long gone, and all I felt now was sadness for what I no longer had. Time and time again throughout the day, I would hear or see something that I knew we would have laughed over. It felt like I'd not only lost the man I loved, but a close friend.
I was tempted to text him. To ask about Lily, and to make sure he got home okay. I was searching for an excuse to maintain a connection to him.
Eventually, I stowed my phone at the bottom of my bag so I wouldn't cave. Alec had made his intentions clear, and I needed to retain the small shred of dignity I still had. I would not contact him again.
The evening was capped off by a special VIP reception for readers who had attended the signing. I had been able to cope during the day, but my sleepless night had finally caught up with me. I had become about as much fun as a zombie. I stuck around long enough to mingle with a few of the bloggers I knew before ducking out. I dragged myself up to my room and collapsed on my bed without bothering to undress.
A dreamless sleep welcomed me, which was all I could ask for.
***
"Sheesh, Nicole. You look like hell," Olivia greeted me when I opened the door for her the day after I returned home.
"Hello to you too," I sniffled, blowing my nose with a tissue.
"No, I'm serious. You look bad."
I rolled my watery eyes, shuffling to the nest of blankets I'd set up on my couch. "Does that mean you don't want to make out?"
She pretended to gag. "I'd rather drink bleach. When you said you were sick, I had no idea it was this bad."
"Duh. Why would I exaggerate that?" I blew my sore nose again, wishing I could cut it off. In the last twenty-four hours, it had been like a faucet. I was ready to scream. It only seemed fitting that I would pick up the worst summer cold I'd ever had. Nothing like adding insult to injury.
"I thought maybe you were wallowing."
I had spewed all the sordid details about Alec and me over a bottle of cheap wine the last night of my book tour. As my friend, Olivia listened with a sympathetic ear, but I also knew she probably thought I was in idiot for even using the L-word. Like Alec, she had a phobia of commitments, and had dumped guys in the past for even hinting about getting that serious.
"He hasn't mentioned anything about it, you know," she added when I chose not to comment.
"I didn't ask."
"I know. I'm just saying."
"Well, stop." I loved Olivia, but I wasn't in the mood to start a conversation that had the potential to turn nasty.
She sank down on the chair next to the couch, not wanting to get close to me. I was tempted to plant a big old smooch on her lips so I wouldn't be the only one miserable, but I could barely stop shivering as I pulled my blanket up to my chin. My fever had obviously returned from the night before.
"Well, this sucks. I wanted to go out and celebrate. Wicked Lovely is ranked in the top ten on all the sites. How are we not screaming this from the rooftops?"
"My throat is too sore for screaming." A ragged cough tore its way out of my mouth, emphasizing the point.