“I’m just nervous. Like, super nervous.”
“Don’t worry,” Matt said, “it’s going to be great. You are going to be great.”
“I hope so,” I said. “I just don’t want to make a bad impression and ruin everything.”
“You won’t,” he said, grinning. “She’s going to love you.”
“Really?” I asked. “Why? What about me could she like? I’m a spoiled rich girl from LA who impulsively moved to Portland and immediately shacked up with the first guy who caught my eye.”
“I caught your eye, eh?” There was something in the tone of his voice that was more than a joke.
“Of course you did. Have you looking in a mirror lately?”
Matt made an acknowledging sound but didn’t say anything else. I fell into my own silence, trying to occupy my mind by watching the scenery. Eventually, Matt turned up the radio, and we fell into a more comfortable quiet as the eighties’ music filled with me with a bit more bubblegum optimism than I thought might be healthy. Maybe it would be okay.
Astoria, it turned out, was a small town. At least compared to Portland, it was tiny. Compared to LA, it was like a speck of dust. But it was cute, and I kept my eyes open to take it all in as we left the highway and pulled into town. Matt pointed out a few sights before turning down a busier street. I followed his point to look out my side of the car and had to do a double-take. It looked exactly like the bar in Portland, only a little smaller.
“No way,” I said. “That’s it?”
“That’s it,” Matt said. “Mom only lives a few streets down. I just thought you’d like to see that before we got there.”
“It’s amazing. It looks just like our bar!”
Matt grinned and continued down the street, eventually turning in to a neighborhood. A couple more turns and he pulled up to a lovely house. There were cars filling the driveway, so he parked on the street nearby and shut off the engine. I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.
“We’re here,” he said. “You’re going to be fine.”
I nodded and grasped the door handle.
“Let’s do this… honey.”
Matt smiled wide and hopped out of the car, swinging around to hold the door open for me and shut it when I was out. I reached out and took his hand, and we made our way down the sidewalk toward the house. I caught our reflection in the glass door on the front and was struck by how good we looked together. I leaned my head against his arm for a moment, if nothing other than to just see what it looked like, and the wooden door inside opened.
“Matthew!” the woman on the inside said, then turned to me. “And you must be Chloe!”
Before I could speak, I was wrapped in a hug from the tiny woman with such powerful arms I could barely breathe. I was smothered by her, and it was an incredibly moving moment. My own mother never hugged me like that. There was a force to that hug, a claim in it. She was protecting me and offering to continue to protect me with that embrace. The smell of the lavender perfume and lingering scent of cut onions and roasted meat filled my senses. I closed my eyes and felt myself smile.
“I am so glad to meet you,” she said, still holding me. When she broke the embrace, she pulled me to arm’s length and looked me up and down. “My goodness, you are more beautiful than my children described. Come on in, let’s get you some wine.”
I turned my head to look at Matt as his mother hooked my arm and began to pull me inside. He shrugged, grinning, and followed us. Turning back to look around, I fell in love with the house immediately. It was small and cozy and full of knick-knacks and wicker and old, heavy wooden bookcases.
It was what every image I always held in my heart of what a family could be was. I could imagine rambunctious boys running through the halls, disappearing down the stairs that led to what I guessed was a basement. Somewhere they could be loud and silly.
Mrs. Anderson guided me into the kitchen, which was full of women. Hannah was there and gave me an excited smile as her shoulders raised. I recognized Becca and Ava from pictures, and Amanda darted out of the room as I came in, chasing a small child. I’d seen her on the photo of the old bar, cozied up to Tom. The whole crew had signed the picture, which showed them on their first theme night.
“Hi, everybody,” I said. “I’m Chloe.”
A wall of sound met me as they all started talking at once. Hugs and congratulations and laughter met me from every direction. A very, very full glass of wine appeared in my hand, and I tried to gain my bearings. Hannah guided me to sit at a little kitchen table, and she joined me to one side, giving me something to anchor the world by. Matt was missing, gone to the living room.