She would raise a temple, here in Neret Sorr. And set into its floor a Terondai, artfully recreating the sun and its torrid gift of fire. An emblem of gold and silver, a symbol of such wealth as to make kings ill. A temple to house a thousand priestesses, two thousand servants. And in the central chamber, she would raise a throne.
The marriage was doomed. There was not enough left in Vatha Urusander to assure a proper balance. Perhaps, she reflected, he had never been what others believed him to be. There was little of value in commanding an army: the talents required seemed few, and the measure of respect accorded it woefully out of proportion.
One need only look at Hunn Raal to see the truth of that. His talent, such as it was, served to feed the ambitions of others, clothed in the trappings of an acceptable violence. When she looked upon soldiers, she saw them as children, still trapped in their games of heroism, triumph, and great causes. But so much of that was delusion. Heroes fell into their heroism, mostly by accident. The triumphs were short-lived and, ultimately, changed nothing, which made those triumphs hollow. As for great causes, well, how often were they revealed to be little more than personal aggrandizement? The elevation of stature, the tidal swell of adoration, the penile gush of glory.
Pray the servants tiptoe in to clean away the sordid stains, once that blazing light was past.
The young woman would please him, she knew. Every hero of the male frame needed his compliant beauty, a creature excited by the stench of old blood on his hands, thrilled to see his wake where bodies lay piled in heaps. Why, she all but drooled at the prospect of his strong arms about her.
The heroes marched back and forth in the courtyard below, day after day, clanking and boisterous in this serious posturing. They each stood, in ranks or alone, with blades within easy reach. This announced to all their dangerous selves. No, she understood them well enough. And like the fate awaiting Vatha Urusander, all would soon come to comprehend their own irrelevance.
There has never been an age of heroes, or not one of which the poets sing in their epic tales. Rather, we but witness one age upon another, and another, each one identical in every detail but for the faces – and even those faces blur into sameness after a time. In recognizing that, is it any wonder Kadaspala went mad?
Oh, they might point to the slaughter, the murder of his sister. But I believe it to be another kind of death that has broken our age’s greatest painter of portraits. When at last he realized that every face was the same. And it looked out at him, ox-dull, belligerent and unchanging. And what were once virtues were suddenly revealed for what they truly were: pride and pomp, preening and pretence.
The age of heroes comes as a belief, and leaves unseen, as a conviction. Not even witnessed, it then finds resurrection in the past, the only realm that it can call home.
There was nothing to weep for, no true loss to bemoan.
She would raise a temple to Light, and by that Light she would reveal unwelcome truths, and by that Light, there would be no place to hide. And then, my friends, in that new age where heroes cannot be found, let us see what glory you might win.
But fear not. I will give you a thousand mindless virgins to use. Of them, there is an inexhaustible supply.
With my temple and the new age it will birth, I can offer this promise – a world where n
o lies can thrive, not even the ones you whisper to yourself. Only truth.
Urusander wants pure justice? Well then, in the name of Light, I shall deliver it.
* * *
With sufficient pressure, even the most pastoral of communities could crack. Too many strangers, too many new and unpleasant currents of power, or threat, and neighbours came to acquire cruel habits. Suspicion and resentment thrived, and the unseen torrent that rushed deep, stirring up sediments, held all the violence waiting to happen.
The town beneath Urusander’s keep had suffered too long. It had reeled to unexpected deaths, buckled to sudden losses, and the crowds of unfamiliar faces, most of them arrogant and contemptuous, turned moods dark and foul.
Captain Serap avoided the Legion camps surrounding the town. Outwardly, she was contending with the grief of two dead sisters, and so her fellow soldiers remained at a distance, and this well suited her. If indeed she was suffering the loss of loved ones, it felt vague, almost formless. She had found a tavern on the high street, which, while it occasionally played host to off-duty soldiers, was more often than not crowded with villagers, whose brooding resentment hung thick and bitter in the smoky air.
It was an atmosphere she welcomed; the heavy swirl of ill humour was now something she could wear, like a winter cloak, and beneath its suffocating weight she was muffled, muted inside and out.
There was no desire to get drunk. No particular need for numb oblivion, and the wild flare of a night’s worth of lust, desire, and thrashing limbs in one of the upstairs rooms ranked low in her list of needs.
The only gift she sought – the one she had found in this place – was solitude. It had always struck her as odd, how so many of her fellow soldiers feared isolation, as if stranded upon a tiny island with only their own self for company. Moments existed to be rushed through, filled to the brim with … with whatever. Anything within reach, in fact. Conversations crowded with nothing of worth; games where knucklebones rolled and bounced and wagers were made in bold gesture or wild shout; the hard muscle pulled close, or soft flesh depending on one’s tastes. A few might sit alone, working on knife edges or whatnot, while still others muttered a lifetime’s worth of confessions into their ale tankards, nodding as they gauged the worth of every returning echo. But all that this did was mark the time passed and make it nothing more than something to be filled.
Lest the silence begin speaking.
It was astonishing, Serap reminded herself, just how much the silence had to say, when given the chance.
Sisters made a community, tightly bound and conspiratorial. That community mocked every need for solitude, if only to fend off the threat it posed. She should have missed it more than she did. Instead, she felt cut loose, set adrift, and now she floated on fog-bound water, where barely a ripple marred the blank surface.
It was a strange realm, this muttering silence, this reflective pool that seemed so dismissive of pity, grief, and commiseration. She had no desire to reach down to break the mirrored perfection of the calm surrounding her. It was enough, she felt, to simply listen.
Risp died in battle, far off to the west. Her first battle. Sevegg had died just outside Neret Sorr, slain by a wounded officer of the Wardens. That, too, had been her first battle. There were details, in the skein of war, which rarely earned mention – the truth of so many who died doing so in their first ever battle. It hinted too much of something unpleasant, something cruel lying in wait beyond the limits of civil contemplation. The silence whispered it to those who dared listen. ‘It is to do, darling, with the sending of innocents to war.’
Well, of course. Who would do such a thing?
‘They do. Over and over again. Training is but the thinnest patina. The innocence remains. Even as each young soldier’s imagination builds proper scenes for what is to come, the innocence remains. Now then, sweet children, draw that blade and march into the press.
‘Here arrives the first shock. Faces twisted with intent. Others arrayed before you, each one seeking to end your life. Your life! What has happened here? How can this be?’