“When did you talk to him?” I ask, forcing down the lump in my throat and trying to piece together the timeline of all of this.
“Sunday,” Levi replies. He grimaces. “I’m sorry, Mercy. I know it was important to you. But Gavin’s got his own reasons for doing what he does.”
That was the day my dad died. The same day I had that talk with Levi after we hooked up.
Shit, did Sloan know that Levi was trying to get my dad out of his deal? Is that why he killed him? Was it my fault for interfering? If that’s the case… fuck. That would make all of this even more massively messed up than it already is. It just gives me even more questions about what the hell is going on here.
Did I get my dad killed by trying to save him?
Just like when I spoke to Rory, I’ve lost track of how long I’ve been sitting here not saying anything, my mind spinning with thoughts and questions and half-formed ideas. None of it is helpful, and I feel like I’m spiraling all over again.
“Hey.” Levi’s quiet voice breaks into my thoughts, snapping me out of my daze for a second. “Are you okay?”
There’s a split second of worry that everything I’m feeling is clear to see on my face, or that Levi can somehow read my thoughts. But his eyes are just concerned when I look at him, like
he’s worried that I’m disappointed he couldn’t help my dad.
I lick my lips, trying to find a smile for him, but it’s not easy. It’s hard as hell when I know there’s nothing I can do to fix this, and when I don’t know who I can trust. Levi seems sincere, but maybe he’s just a good goddamn actor. Maybe he’s just stringing me along.
Shit. I wish I had stayed in my room.
“Mercy,” Levi says again, reaching out to take one of my hands in his. “I know it seems bad, okay? But it’s going to be all right. Your dad will be fine. I promise.”
My heart hurts just hearing that. Levi’s either lying or oblivious, but either way, there’s no comfort to be taken from his words. I know they’re not true, no matter how sincere he sounds.
Because my dad’s already dead.
5
School is a welcome change of pace from being cooped up at the house, and I go through the motions all day on Wednesday
It doesn’t really help that Levi is there after every class, waiting on me with that lopsided smile and teasing me about telling him what I learned in each class session. It’s familiar, and if it wasn’t for everything going on, it would even be nice. But now it just makes me feel guilty and conflicted, and I hate that.
We go back to the house in the afternoon, and Levi disappears to go handle some business or whatever, leaving me to trudge up to my room alone. Once I’ve closed the door behind myself, I drop my bag on the floor and sigh, flopping onto my bed and staring at the ceiling.
My phone vibrates in my pocket, making me curse softly.
I know without even looking at it that it’s going to be more texts from Scarlett. We haven’t really talked since everything went down between Sloan and my dad, and even though I’ve seen her at school these past few days, it’s only been in passing.
I know she knows something is wrong. We never go this long without talking to each other, even if it’s just texting, and if I talk to her, really talk to her, I’m never going to be able to keep my mask up.
It’s hard enough to fake it around the guys, but Scarlett knows me too damned well. She’ll be able to take one look at me and see that there’s something going on.
At the same time, I can’t keep ignoring her. My best friend is persistent as hell, and if I don’t answer before too long, I wouldn’t put it past her to come barging into the house looking for me. That’s just the kind of ride-or-die chick she is, and usually I’m grateful for it. Now I’m not so sure it’s a good thing. If I see her, I already know it’s going to be hard to keep everything from spilling out. I haven’t told anyone what happened, and it’s eating at me, but I don’t know if I should bring her into this mess. It’s dangerous as fuck, and I don’t want her to get hurt.
Goddammit. Everything is so fucked up, and I have no idea what the right answer is.
My phone buzzes again. Blowing out a breath, I pull it out of my pocket, unlocking the screen and navigating to my messages. Six missed texts, all from Scarlett.
SCAR: You sure were hustling at school today. Everything okay?
SCAR: Do you wanna grab some food after classes today? Will your sexy caretakers let you out that long?
SCAR: Mercyyyyyyy, why are you ignoring me???
SCAR: Okay, seriously, I’m starting to get worried. Are you okay??
SCAR: Are you in trouble? Are they trying to keep you from talking to me?? I’ll show up at that house and kick their asses if they’re trying to cut you off from your friends now.