I’m not even paying attention. In fact, I decide to leave in the middle of it because I can’t sit still. Thankfully, all of them are too absorbed to notice my exit.
Where are you, Zach?
Maybe I’m going crazy. Maybe losing my virginity has made me all emotional and girly. That’s the reason I want to take the day off and cry in my pillow.
I’ve been thinking so hard about all the things that I don’t watch where I’m going and I bump into someone.
Not again.
This time though, it’s Zach.
“You,” I say with wide eyes.
His dark gaze watches me intensely. “Me.”
“I was…”
I should be relieved that he’s back. That he didn’t leave for good. But suddenly, I’m feeling restless. Breathless, even. My thighs clench and there’s an ache in between my legs. Where he was last night.
“You were what?”
His rough, heavy tone makes my toes curl in my boots. “I was, uh, looking for you all morning.”
“I went out for a ride.”
I notice his wind-swept hair, then. The slight flush on his cheeks and the scent of outdoors mixed in with his own sweet, delicious smell. He must’ve just gotten back.
“Why?”
“Wanted to clear my head.”
“Of what?” I ask, distractedly as I watch his lips.
“Of you.”
I jerk my eyes up to him and I realize in the last few seconds, his breathing has escalated just like mine. He looks on the verge of something and I probably look the same. The verge of throwing myself at him, touching him, climbing his body, to reassure myself that he’s really here.
That we really had sex last night.
“Of me?”
“Yeah.” His eyes bore into mine. “But I couldn’t.”
God, I’m buzzing.
My breaths are rattling my lungs and there’s a crackle under my skin.
I don’t want to, but I break our stare and glance back. The kitchen hallway is empty and so is the main hallway. I can hear people chatting in the staff room but no one’s up and about. Which is super rare and I know it’s not going to stay that way. Someone’s bound to come, scurrying for one emergency or another.
I grab his hand and pull him away from the mouth of the hallway. “Let’s go.”
Silently, he lets me drag him into the closet just by the kitchen, as if he wanted to be alone with me as much as I did.
It’s the same closet I hid myself in the first night he came back. I hadn’t even seen him yet and I could still feel him, moving around in my body.
He is under my skin. Always has been.
I shut the door and switch on the light, facing him.
There’s hardly any space between us. The closet was small to begin with but with him inside it, I feel like there’s not enough air for us to breathe.
And then, Zach eats up that bare minimum space by pressing into my body. My spine’s stuck to the door and my front is flush with his.
“There was blood. On the sheets. I saw it when I left,” he rasps, and I feel his cock, throbbing just under my ribs.
I thread my fingers through his hair. “I know. I saw it too.”
Pain flashes through his features. Pain and regret. Probably for making me bleed.
“I’m...”
“I like it,” I whisper when he trails off, craning my neck up to get closer to his lips. “It means I’m yours and you’re mine.”
He swallows as he scans my face. “Are you feeling okay?”
At this, I lose my breath and tighten my arms around his neck like he’ll leave right now, right this second. I haven’t been feeling okay all morning.
“Blue?”
Biting my lip, I shake my head once.
His expression goes alert and so does his body. All tight and big and clashing with the softness of mine.
“Do you hurt?”
“I, uh, it’s not that.”
His hands grab my waist. “Then, what is it?”
I caress his stubbled jaw with my thumb, grazing the seam of his lower lip. It’s so soft and full. “Do you… where do you live in New York?”
A frown bisects his smooth forehead and I go to caress that with my other thumb. “What?”
I move lower and trace the arch of his strong brows. “I just never asked you. Do you have like an apartment?”
He takes a few moments to answer as he watches me. “I share it with a couple of guys.”
I smile slightly, rubbing the peak of his cheekbone. “Your friends?”
The pads of his fingers dig into my waist. “Kinda. Just some people Scoot, the guy who worked here before, hooked me up with.”
“They ride like you?”
“One of them does. We, uh, perform at shows and stuff. I’m not home a lot.”
I still remember the night I saw him jumping across the gap in the ground. It was scary, so fucking scary. But he was magnificent, too. Brave and shiny like a star.