As Georgia got closer, she was mouthing the words to the song, gazing at Kline.
And when she reached him, Dick hugged them both, and Kline pulled her into his arms. She whispered something into his ear and he nodded, his face pressed against her neck. And then he leaned back, staring down at his bride, and said, “You’re so beautiful.”
I’m pretty sure every woman in attendance swooned. I sure as hell did.
They stood before the minister, hand in hand, ready to profess their love and the rest of their lives to one another.
The minister greeted the attendants and proceeded to say nice, beautiful things about the happy couple. He was actually one of Dick’s closest friends, which was probably a good thing, considering most of the people at this wedding tended to toss out the F-word more often than not.
And when the minister announced it was time for the vows, Dick cheered, “Hell yeah! Let’s do this!”
See what I mean? Good thing he knew the kind of room full of morons he was walking into.
Kline pulled a neatly folded piece of white paper from his inside jacket pocket while Georgia slid the balled up paper towel out of her cleavage.
They handed each other their vows.
He glanced down at his tattered version and started laughing. “You finished these about two minutes before you walked down the aisle, didn’t you, Benny?”
“I’ll never tell,” she said through a giggle.
He chuckled again. “God, I love you.”
“It’s not time for that!” Thatch yelled behind him. “Vows first!”
The crowd laughed.
“Okay, I guess I’ll go first,” Kline announced, unwrinkling the paper towel.
“Georgia Rose, I promise to trust you even when you deviate from our grocery list and convince me to buy six boxes of Dunkaroos and three bottles of wine I know you’ll never drink.
“I promise to give you all of the love and support that I don’t give Walter. Also, I promise to be nicer to Walter.” He paused, glancing up at her and shaking his head with a giant grin.
“I’m not saying that.”
She tapped the towel. “You have to. They’re your vows, remember?”
He turned toward the attendants, letting everyone else in on the secret. “We wrote each other’s vows, if you couldn’t already tell.”
“I warned you, Kline!” Dick shouted toward him. “Ballbuster.”
“Daddy!” Georgia scolded. “There will be no talk of balls during my wedding ceremony.”
The room filled with more laughter.
Once everyone settled down, Kline cleared his throat and continued, “He’s a really good cat. The best cat. Man, I sure love Walter.” He rolled his eyes, but said it nonetheless.
“I promise I’ll never keep anything from you because there are no secrets between us. I vow to love you through the difficult and the easy. I promise to never put you or myself in danger. This includes me never drinking lime juice with my scotch ever again.” He winked at her.
“I vow to never change from the amazing man that I already am. I promise to never lose my huge, strong, kind, and determined heart. I will never stop teasing you, making you laugh, or flashing smoldering blue eyes your way. I will always greet you with the smile that’s only yours. And when it’s just the two of us at home, I vow to only wear boxer briefs around the house. No matter what I’m doing, I’ll either be naked or just wearing boxers.” His blue eyes found hers, his brows waggling in agreement as a few women in the crowd hooted some catcalls.
“And I vow to listen, for as long as it takes for you to feel heard. I vow to be your unrelenting cheer squad on the days it feels too much. I vow to pick the important fights with you, especially when I know you’re selling yourself short or not being treated with respect.
“I vow to spend the rest of our lives laughing, smiling, going on crazy adventures, and most importantly, loving each other through the good times and the bad. And if there are bad times, I promise the kind of makeup sex that has your blouse buttons hitting the floor.”
And on the last sentence, he stared deep into her eyes. “I vow that I will love you, Georgia, every day, for the rest of forever.”
Georgia sniffled a few times, and I handed her a tissue to wipe her eyes.
“Don’t cry, TAPRoseNEXT,” Kline whispered, brushing away a few tears. “You may have written those vows, but I’ll stand by every last word.”
She giggled at his sincerity, but I wasn’t used to it, and therefore, found myself completely ill prepared. I dabbed at fresh tears with the back of my hand as she unfolded the paper in her hands.
“Kline Matthew, I stand before you today to become your wife.” She paused for a second, looked up at him and then back at the paper. “I think everyone here knows that already, but I’ve got this feeling that you really wanted to hear me say it.”