"Hello?" Across the table from her, Alex watched her over the rim of her beer glass. "FYI, in case you're wondering, you're doing it again, Jen.
What's going on with you?"
"I suppose you mean other than the obvious," Jenna replied, pushing aside her plate and leaning back in her chair.
She stared at her friend, the most sympathetic, supportive person she knew--the one person, aside from Brock, who'd given her the strength she needed to get through the worst of her life's ordeals. Jenna realized she owed Alex more than the usual don't-worry-about-me facade. Never mind the fact that Alex had the ability to see through any bullshit with her built-in lie detector, courtesy of her Breedmate genetics.
Jenna took a slow breath and let it out on a sigh. "Something happened earlier. Between Brock and me."
"Something ... happened?" Alex looked at her in silence for a moment before her brow knit into a frown. "Are you saying ..."
"Yeah, that's exactly what I'm saying." Jenna got up from the table and began clearing her place setting. "I was in the war room alone, after everyone had gone to bed. Brock came in, and we started talking, then we started kissing. Things got really intense, really quickly. I don't think either one of us meant for it to happen."
Alex followed her into the kitchen. "You and Brock ... slept together?"
she asked. "You had sex in the war room?"
"God, no. We just kissed in there. On the conference table. The sex came later, in his quarters. Or, rather, my quarters." Jenna felt a blush creep into her cheeks. She wasn't used to discussing her intimate life--mainly because she hadn't had one in a very long time. And certainly never anything as out of control as what she and Brock had shared. "Oh, for crissake, don't make me spell out every detail. Say something, Alex."
She stared, somewhat slack-jawed. "I'm, um ..."
"Shocked? Disappointed? You can tell me," Jenna said, trying to guess what her friend must think of her, having known how she'd avoided anything resembling a relationship or intimacy in the years since the accident, only to end up in bed with one of the Order's warriors after just a couple of days in his company. "You must think I'm pathetic. God knows I do."
"Jenna, no." Alex took her by the shoulders, forcing Jenna to hold her gaze. "I don't think any of those things at all. I'm surprised ... then again, not so much. It was obvious to me that you and Brock had a connection, even before you were brought here to the compound. And Kade mentioned to me a couple of times that Brock was very attracted to you and that he was concerned about you, protective of you."
"Really?" Curiosity fluttered to life inside her against her will. "He talked to Kade about me--when? What did he say?" She suddenly felt like a teenage girl prying for details on a schoolyard crush. "Oh, God--forget it. I don't want to know. It doesn't matter. What happened between us didn't mean anything. In fact, I'd really like to forget about it."
If only it was that easy to put the whole thing out of her mind.
Alex's eyes were soft, her words careful. "Is that what Brock thinks, too? That making love didn't mean anything? That you should try to pretend it didn't happen?"
Jenna thought back to the incredible passion they'd shared and his tender words afterward. He'd told her he didn't want her to regret it. He didn't want her to think it was a mistake. Sweet, caring words that he'd offered just moments before he'd fled from the room and left her sitting alone and confused in the dark.
"We agreed up front that there would be no strings, that it wasn't going to go anywhere between us," she heard herself murmur as she broke from Alex's gaze and pivoted to clear more dishes. She didn't want to think about how good it felt to be in Brock's arms, or the startling hungers he stirred within her. "It was just sex, Alex, and a onetime thing at that. I mean, it's not like I don't have bigger things to worry about, right? I'm not about to make everything worse by getting involved with him--physically or otherwise."
It sounded like a smart and reasonable argument, though whether she was trying to convince her friend or herself, she wasn't totally certain.
Alex drifted out of the kitchen behind her. "I think you already care about him, Jen. I think Brock has come to mean something to you, and it's got you terrified."
Jenna pivoted around, stricken to hear the dead-aim truth voiced out loud. "I don't want to feel anything for him. I can't, Alex."
"Would it be so bad if you did?"
"Yes," she replied, emphatic. "My life is uncertain enough as it is.
How foolish would I be if I let myself fall for him?"
Alex's smile was subtly compassionate. "I think there are worse things you could do. Brock's a good man."
Jenna shook her head. "He's not even totally human, in case either of us is tempted to forget that small fact. Although I probably should be questioning my own humanity, after the way I bit him earlier tonight."
Alex's brows arched. "You bit him?"
Too late to take back her careless blurt, Jenna tapped a finger against the side of her neck. "While we were in bed. I don't know what came over me. I suppose I got swept away in the moment, and I just ... bit him. Hard enough to draw blood."
"Oh," Alex replied slowly, studying her now. "And how did that feel to you, biting him?"
Jenna huffed out a short sigh. "Crazy. Impulsive. Like a runaway train. It was embarrassing as hell, if you want to know the truth. Brock seemed to think so, too. He couldn't get away from me fast enough afterward."