“Of course.” He reached up and brushed her hand away, massaging her temple. “Have you drunk plenty of water today? Did you eat some dinner?”
He hadn’t come to dinner tonight. He’d only made one other dinner since that first night. Nobody else thought anything of it. Except for her.
“I ate dinner,” she reassured him. “I think it’s just everything that happened today catching up with me.”
He slid her off his lap, holding her for a moment to make sure she was steady before standing then swinging her up into his arms.
She wrapped her arms around his neck. “I can walk.”
“You can. You won’t, though.” He carried her up the stairs, buck-naked. His brothers didn’t hang around after dinner anymore. She didn’t know what he’d said to them, and she didn’t want to know. No one had said anything to her, though. Thank God, or she’d probably have died of mortification.
When he reached her bedroom, he set her down. “Go do what you to need to do, babe. I’ll wait for you.”
He turned away and started to pull down the bed. She slipped into the bathroom. She took a migraine pill first because it felt like it was building towards a bad one. Then she brushed her teeth and flossed, used the toilet before pulling on the large T-shirt she slept in.
She moved back into the bedroom.
“You take some medicine?” he asked from where he stood next to the bed.
“Yes.”
“Good.” He walked over to her then gently tipped her chin up. His eyes studied her. “Too pale. Dark patches under your eyes. Definitely in pain.”
She didn’t think he required an answer and she didn’t feel much like talking. She just wanted to crawl into bed and pull the covers over her head and try to forget this day ever happened.
“Think you should sleep with me tonight, babe.”
Okay, that was unexpected. She’d only slept with him the night of her panic attack. So he’d sleep with her if he thought she needed watching? Not because he wanted to.
Damn, when did she get so bitter?
“I’m all right.”
“You’re definitely not all right and I don’t like it.” His voice was a low growl of discontent. She thought about pointing out that he was off the clock, so to speak. But she figured she’d already pushed her luck far enough tonight.
“I’ll be okay. Best thing to do is sleep someplace quiet and dark. If I slept with you, you’d probably just disturb me.”
No way in hell. Because she wanted nothing more than to feel his arms around her. But she wanted that for the right reasons. Not out of a sense of obligation.
She didn’t want to be anyone’s obligation anymore. She wanted to be wanted. For who she was. Not what she could do for someone. She wanted to be someone’s everything. To be loved.
She deserved that, right? Yes, she deserved that.
The words settled inside her. She deserved more.
Well, all right then. Took her long enough to figure that one out. She guessed she owed that to him. Loving someone who didn’t love you back sucked. Big time.
“All right then, baby. Come on, lie down before you fall down. I’ll come check on you later.”
“No,” she said quickly. Too quickly. He frowned down at her.
“I’m just better being alone.” She also didn’t want him coming in in case she was no longer in the bed. She moved the blankets and light out of the closet each morning, putting them back so he didn’t have a chance to notice when he brought her up to bed. But if he popped in at any time . . . yeah, not good.
“Okay, baby. You just rest.” He tucked her in and leaned over to kiss her. And if there was a note of disappointment in his voice, well, she just told herself she’d imagined it.
He was fucking this up.
Fucking up royally.