“Goddammit, Madison,” he whimpered with so much emotion, it damn near almost knocked me flat on my face.
“What’d I do now?” I mentally began sifting through my memories with the help of my good pal anxiety, flicking through those pages to make sure I hadn’t done anything else wrong.
“Stop.”
There was that one morning that I had said some bad things abou—
“Madison.” His hand came to my cheek and he turned my face toward him. His eyes pierced into mine. “I said, stop.” Then his thumb brushed softly over my bottom lip, his eyes watching the movement. “Stop overanalyzing and overthinking my move, for once.” He paused and then continued. “Usually, this would be the part where I’d say ‘you can’t figure me out, so give it up,’ but I’ve come to the realization that…” he grinned. “I’m a fucking liar.”
“A what?”
“A liar.” His thumb stopped moving and instantly, I missed the caress of his rough touch. “It’s fucking you, Madison. You’re the only person walking this earth that could ever figure me out. You’re the only fucking person walking this earth that I truly know I’d kill a motherfucker for, and you’re the only fucking girl walking this earth that has me.”
“Has you?” I whispered, tears threatening to surface. I wasn’t sure how to fully take in this side of Bishop. I had seen snippets of it in the past, but as quickly as I had seen it, it had been ripped away from me again before I could fully comprehend, or even enjoy, what I was feeling. “I have you?”
A small smile tickled his lips. It wasn’t a cocky smile or a smug smile. It was genuine. “You’ve always had me, Madison. You know that.”
Do I?
Pulling my bottom lip into my mouth, I take my gaze off him and look to the floor to ceiling window in front of me, this would be my side when I was staying. I didn’t want to risk the chance of breaking whatever moment we were having right now, but I needed to know before I took another step in the direction of what was Bishop and Madison.
“Can I ask you something without you flipping your switch on me?”
“Anything,” he expressed, his voice low and soft.
I took a deep breath. “I know about your deal with your father.”
Pause.
I continued, “So I need to know one thing, and I will only ask you once.” Then I finally let my attention go back to him. He was watching me, and I him. “Is this real, or is this a game?”
He searched my face. “Madison, does this—what we have, the connection and everything that we’ve experienced since we met—does that all seem fake to you?”
There was no second-guessing that answer. “No. But I never second-guessed my feelings, it was yours I was unsure about.”
His arm snaked around my waist as he lifted me up, placing me down on his lap so I was facing him with my legs straddled around his hips. His hands fell to my ass and he squeezed. “I may not fully understand my own feelings when it comes to you, and I never have, but when I do, you’ll be the first person to know about it.”
I smiled, my hand coming to his face. If that was as close to a ‘I love you,’ that I was going to get for now, I was happy. I wrapped my arm around the back of his neck.
“Now, can you ride on my dick for a few hours so we can sleep.” My head tipped back as I laughed, just as he pulled me down onto the bed and tore off my little dress. “This is sexy as fuck, Mads.” His fingers traced the mesh material.
“You like?”
His eyes flew to mine. “It’s a favorite for sure, but right now, it needs to be on the floor.” Then he threw it across the room before his hands came to my back, and he pushed my chest down onto his face.
“Wait!” My hands came to his chest. “I almost forgot.” I arched my back so I could access my back pocket and took out the 10kt heavy white gold curb chain. The shotgun bullet shell that dangled off of it was lightly engraved. BVH + MMV. It was cheesy, and I was scared.
He took it, his eyes searching mine and then going back to the chain. “Baby…”
“Happy birthday.”
He kissed me hard, wrapping the chain around his fist. He leaned back. “Put it on?”
I nodded and got up, taking the chain from him. When it was securely around his neck, he turned around quickly, shoving me back onto the bed. My laughter was cut short by his teeth catching my nipple. He bit down, and I moaned, my head tilting back. I could feel his hardness pressing against my clit and I slowly rubbed myself over him. His hands fell to my hips and he squeezed tightly, his eyes rolling to the back of his head as his tongue slid out and wet his bottom lip. Sexy. As. Fuck. He caught my smile, narrowed his eyes, and then flipped me onto my back. I screamed out in shock, then his head dove into my neck while his knee hitched my leg up, pressing himself into me while his tongue licked over my collarbone.