nd for fighting.
Rocco has probably saved me from considerable embarrassment or even worse. If one of the dungeon monitors had heard what I said, I could have gotten suspended from the club. Intolerance of another’s consensual kink isn’t acceptable behavior, and I definitely crossed the line. If either Cree or Kas reported my behavior and launched a formal complaint, I could even be banned, and it would be my own fault.
I take a long, deep breath. This isn’t new to me—I’m always surrounded by rough sex and foreplay in the dungeon. It’s part of the atmosphere, and I usually deal with it just fine. After telling Rocco about my past, I had been more on edge than usual. I was also angry with myself for pushing Rocco too hard, and seeing Kas’s bruises just set me off.
I reach up and stroke the side of Rocco’s face, smiling.
“So am I,” I say. I’m glad to have my attention brought back to him, and I need to make sure he knows it is my fault, not his. “I pushed too much, and I didn’t mean to. I just want to know more about you, but it’s okay if you don’t want to tell me.”
“You told me about your past,” he says quietly. “I should tell you about mine.”
“You don’t have to.” I shake my head slowly. “You certainly don’t have to do it tonight. We can wait as long as you need.”
“I know,” he says. “I want to though. I really do. It’s just...hard to find the words.”
“I understand.” My shoulders slump as relief blankets my body. Maybe I hadn’t screwed this up completely. If he’s still here, I have another chance to make this work. I remind myself that I have made some progress with him, and I just need to find the right pace—the pace that works for him, not me.
We return to the blanket and cushions, and I look into Rocco’s eyes. I can’t read his expression, and it’s frustrating. I’m at a loss not knowing if I should tie him up, hug him, or just call it a night.
“Do you want to lie down again? Or just sit with me? Or...” I let my voice trail off.
“I thought you were going to make the decisions.”
“I did say that, didn’t I?” I grin at him and then take his hand. “Come sit with me.”
I lie back on the cushions and Rocco reclines between my legs.
“Hold on,” I say as I pull at the corset drawstrings. Rocco’s eyes glisten as my tits are revealed. “Come on, now. You know you want to.”
Rocco smiles as he turns his body to place his head on my chest. He reaches around and wraps his arm around my hip.
“Comfortable?” I ask.
“Yes,” he says, “very.”
“Good.” I run my hands over his shoulders and back. He feels relaxed enough, and my best course is to lead him a little, then see where he takes himself. “Now, I’m not going to push. You tell me whatever you want to tell me, okay?”
“Okay.”
And with that, he lapses into silence. I run my hand up and down his back. He doesn’t tense up, but he also doesn’t say anything. I run my fingers through his hair, and still he says nothing. I lose track of time as my butt begins to go numb.
“What were you and Kas talking about?” Rocco finally asks.
“Nothing, really.” I take in a long breath. His words are not about the topic I was expecting or wanting to discuss.
“You were yelling at her.”
“Yeah, well—her taste in men sucks.” I grit my teeth, still annoyed with her smiling, sunny disposition, and knowing I’m being shitty about it at the same time. I take a deep breath, deciding Rocco deserves a better answer. “Though I can talk about what happened to me, I’m usually a bit on edge after I tell someone about it for the first time. Having a girl Cree is fucking come up to me the way she did...I just didn’t like it.”
“But Cree never did anything to you.”
“No, he didn’t, but men with similar fantasies did.”
“Cree wouldn’t hurt anyone,” Rocco says. “I know he wouldn’t. He wouldn’t...do anything like that.”
“He does though, doesn’t he? He just finds a chick who gets off on it, too.”
“That makes it different.”