Her hand went to her stomach. What if he had already gotten her with child? What would she do? What would he do? She pushed the disturbing thought from her mind. She did not want to think about it.
Before he left he had mentioned again that she should talk with Elsa the healer. He had not stated why, though he seemed adamant about it to a point where he had made it sound more an order than a suggestion.
Curiosity had her wondering over it and so when she finished a quick morning meal of porridge that had been delivered to her door and had been far tastier than she had thought possible, she slipped on her cloak and opened the door.
Neil blocked the open doorway. She smiled pleasantly and gestured with her fingers as if taking a walk and then scrunched her face and held her stomach.
“You need the healer?”
She didn’t bother to correct him about needing the healing versus visiting the healer since he nodded and stepped aside to let her out.
“I’ll be walking right behind you. I’ll let no one hurt you.”
His adamant words not only startled but endeared her to him and made her feel safe. She nodded, smiled, and pressed her hand to her chest in a show of gratitude.
He bobbed his head and his cheeks flushed red letting her know that he understood her.
The day was overcast, blustery, and more than a chill stung the air. Still, villagers were busy going about their chores and most wore smiles. Children scampered around laughing and found fun in almost anything. The village Dowell appeared brighter and happier than it had in a long time and oddly enough they owed it all to the devil.
Dawn took her time admiring the changes that were taking place. Roofs were being repaired, fences mended, peat and wood stacked for the coming winter, new furnishings being made by skilled hands that had been kept idle too long. The village actually looked alive.
When she reached Elsa’s place she wasn’t surprised to see that the room being added to her cottage had been finished and that her two helpers Ann and Lara were busy sweeping it out, making it ready for use.
When Elsa saw her approach, she signaled the two women and before Dawn reached the cottage the two women were on their way each with baskets on their arms. It appeared that Elsa planned on having privacy when they spoke and Dawn wondered why.
Neil waited outside the cottage a few feet away, he also granting them privacy.
“Sit,” Elsa offered pointing to a chair at the table once she closed the door.
Dawn slipped her cloak off draping it over the back of the chair and sat while Elsa prepared two hot ciders for them.
“I am so glad you stopped to visit, I was hoping to speak with you,” Elsa said joining her at the table.
Dawn threw her shoulder back, puffed out her chest and scowled, then tapped her chest and pointed to Elsa.
The woman laughed. “You’re telling me that Cree sent you.”
Dawn nodded and shrugged asking why.
Elsa retained her pleasant smile as she said, “You are aware that everyone knows of your new status in the village.”
The woman was kind not calling her what she was certain many did; a kept woman or as her attacker had said the devil’s whore. Cree’s mistress, of course, sounded much nicer, though she was what she was and no matter what way you put it, she belonged to Cree.
“Naturally, with coupling comes the chance of a babe. Have you given that thought?”
Dawn stared at her with a blank expression not believing that the woman asked her such a personal question. And why? Then the thought hit her. Had Cree talked with Elsa of the possibility of her carrying his child and if so why? She shrugged and scrunched her brow.
“Why, you ask?”
Dawn nodded.
“I wondered if perhaps you wished to prevent pregnancy. If so there is a plant, wild carrot that works well, though there is one thing that you must consider before using it. If you are already with child then it will abort the babe. Of course the choice is yours as to whether you wish to make use of it or not.”
Did Cree worry she could be with child? The question tolled like a loud bell in her head. Cree had not spilled his seed in her at first and now that he had, did he worry that it had taken root? Did he want her to abort his babe that might already be growing within her? Did he fear having a son or daughter like her… voiceless?
The joy she had woken with this morning quickly vanished and once again she felt trapped—a prisoner—for though Elsa made it seem it was up to her, it wasn’t. If Cree so chose he could dictate otherwise.