“A kid?” Rochelle repeats, her brow creasing. “So he’s married? How old is this guy?”
I shrug and pick nervously at the blades of grass around me. “I’m not sure. Older. Maybe thirty-five? Forty? I don’t think he’s married. There’s just the two of them.”
Rochelle’s eyes widen to show a circle of white around her deep brown irises. “Forty? That’s almost as old enough to be your father. How hot can he be?”
“Very,” I say, turning to look her in the eyes. “Is it bad that I think he’s hot?”
Rochelle blinks. “Hey, you feel how you feel. There’s no right or wrong, good or bad. If you’re into older guys, it’s no wonder I can’t get you interested in any campus sausage,” she says, nudging me with her elbow. “What happened that’s so embarrassing?”
“I went over to welcome them to the neighborhood, and I swear my heart dropped into my toes when I saw him close up—he’s so handsome. And ripped. He’s got muscles on top of his muscles. Just the sound of his voice made my insides turn to mush. We were talking, and when he got called into work, I offered to watch his little girl, Rose. He was only supposed to be an hour, but after two hours I put her down for a nap and went outside to cool off in the backyard. You know how it was yesterday.”
Rochelle nods. “And?”
“I turned on the garden hose, just to wet my neck, but…” I swallow the uncomfortable lump in my throat. “I pretty much ended up taking a shower. It felt so good I just kept pouring it over my head and shoulders. I thought I’d be dry again in a minute… but then he saw me. Caught me by surprise, all soaking wet, my nipples sticking out for the world to see. I thought I’d die of embarrassment.” I look over at my friend, hoping for some sympathy. Advice. Anything.
“And what did he do?” Rochelle asks.
“He got me a towel. But I saw how he looked at me. Just like the guys on campus. I felt like raw meat.”
As predicted, Rochelle bursts out laughing. “Well, he’s a guy after all. Of course he looked at you. You’re not exactly a tomboy, Quinnie. You’ve got curves that would put a rattlesnake to shame. Is that a bad thing? I thought you said you liked him.”
“I do like him, but Roch, I don’t want to be just a sex object or a one-night stand. What if that’s all he sees me as?”
“Well if he’s as good looking as you say he is, I’d say ‘bring it honey’,” she says as she laughs and grabs at her crotch to make her point. “I like a man with experience. But you…” she clucks her tongue. “I know you and your ‘Snow White’ analytic brain… not to mention your ‘Snow White’ virgin pussy. You want your first time to be all roses and rainbows and unicorns.” Rochelle shakes her curly head. “Sorry, sugar. This is the real world. If that’s what you want, be prepared to be disappointed.”
I frown at her cavalier attitude. But that’s Rochelle, slutty by nature. “So far, you’re not helping,” I say.
Rochelle shrugs. “What do you want? A guarantee? There are no guarantees. If you want to lose your virginity, I’m sure he’ll help you out. But if the idea bothers you, just stay away from him.”
“I can’t. He’s asked me to babysit again tonight, and I said yes.”
She admonishes me with a disdainful tilt of her head. “Well, then I suggest you be careful. But it sounds to me like you’ve already made a decision. If he’s into you, just enjoy it. I know it’s hard for you, Ms. Psychology major, but sometimes you just have to stop analyzing things.”
“You’re right.” I promise to take her advice as we leave the common, brushing grass off our legs, and I just hope I will be thinking as clearly when I come face-to-face with Logan Brenner again tonight.
***
At six o’clock I knock on Logan’s door. It’s another warm evening, and I’m wearing shorts again but made sure to put on a brassiere this time. I chose a baggy T-shirt so as not to call attention to any of my bumps, curves or protrudi
ng nipples.
I’m determined to keep my cool and not let yesterday’s incident bother me, but I’m already compromised at the sight of a smiling Logan that greets me in the doorway wearing a sport coat, dress shirt, and slacks. He looks amazing. “Hi, you’re right on time. Come in.”
I step inside, and a rush of cool air meets me. It seems he’s managed to fix the air conditioning.
“Hi. I’ve brought a couple of movies that I thought Rose might like,” I say, and gesture to the portable DVD player in my hand. “I hope that’s alright. I didn’t know if you have your TV and stuff set up yet.”
“How thoughtful of you. I’m sure Rose will love that.”
As if on cue, Rose comes running from the other side of the room toward me with her arms open. “Kin!” she squeals. I laugh at her interpretation of my name. She’s adorable and seems to have taken to me despite only meeting me once. I set the player down and wrap her in a friendly hug.
“Well, it looks like you’ve gotten the official welcome,” Logan says, checking his watch. “I shouldn’t be too long. You girls have fun, okay? Bye Rosebud. Give Daddy a kiss?”
“Nuh-uh,” Rose says with a shake of her brunette head, seemingly unwilling to let go of me. “Bye, Daddy.” Now I’m convinced that her mother is not in the picture, given how much she seems to want my company, even refusing a kiss from Daddy. There I go, over-analyzing already. Logan feigns a hurtful look, sticking out his lower lip. I want to kiss those lips in the worst way, so I focus on Rose instead.
“Is your name Rosebud?” I ask in an exaggerated voice. “I thought it was Rose.” She giggles and squirms free.
“Come see my room!” she says, beckoning with her tiny fingers before speeding off down the hallway.