“What?” I exclaim, getting to my feet. “How? Why? Why would he lie?” I pause, memories coming back to me. “Oh my god. I saw her today in the diner. She was talking to Jay. He denied it, denied seeing her. Was it her?”
She nods, slowly getting to her feet. She stretches, cracking her back. “It was her. She can appear sometimes when she’s not being watched. She’s almost always watched.”
I’m so angry I could scream. “Why did she appear to him instead of me?”
“Because she’s probably trying to convince him to let you come to her.”
“And he lied to my face! That shouldn’t be allowed. Jacobs are . . . are . . . they’re on our side.”
She snorts. “They are not on sides, they just are. They aren’t good and they aren’t bad. They skirt the grey and they’re just as vulnerable as the humans they once were. My Jakob is a little devil sometimes. Forever this young boy, always playing games. He never means me harm but he’s adept at manipulation. I’ve been around him for so long now that I know how to handle him. But you’re new to this.”
“And so is Jay,” I say. “He’s a rookie.”
She raises her brow skeptically, as if to say, is that what he told you too?
“Regardless,” she goes on, “you need to go to her. And you need to convince him to let you go because that man will follow you until the ends of the earth before he lets you go. And then, when you’re there, you will put up the walls so that no demon, no damned soul, will ever see you.”
“And how will I find her? How will she find me?”
“There is a bond that can’t be broken,” she says. “From me to her. From her to you.”
She shuffles back across the room and brings me into a big hug, one I’m too shocked to return.
“Don’t trust him,” she whispers in my ear. “Don’t trust yourself. Trust your heart. Your true heart. The inner compass. That will never steer you wrong.”
Then she pulls back and pushes a piece of hair behind my ears. “Now, go back to your world. And do some good.”
Suddenly the world shudders and my bones pop like bubbles are bursting inside and the grey air shimmers, stretched, until I see the haze of a hotel room.
And I fall flat on my face on the carpeted floor.
“Ada!” Jay’s voice coming from so far away.
His hands on my back, feeling my neck for a pulse.
They travel down my arms until he gets a hold and then hauls me up to my feet.
I can barely stand but I’m no longer drunk. I’m just so disoriented I don’t know what world I’m in anymore.
But this world has color. It has morning sunshine and smells of coffee.
It has Jay staring at me with a reddened face, brows drawn sharply together, looking both worried and furious.
“Where the fuck did you go?” he asks.
His language shocks me further awake. I blink and try and walk away from him. I get as far as the desk in the room before he grabs me again and whirls me around to face him. I’m vaguely aware I’m in his Led Zeppelin t-shirt, which means I was also wearing that in the Veil. Which means he must have undressed me when I slept. My mind can’t even latch on to that idea right now.
“Where did you go?” he repeats, more frantic now.
“To a secret place,” I mumble. I take a seat in the chair and blink back the sight. My brain feels like it’s been siphoned. Perhaps I left it all behind in Pippa’s cell.
Then it all comes back to me at once.
The rush of anger.
I glare at Jay with all the fury that’s dying to be released.
“You bastard,” I say through gritted teeth.
Now he’s shocked. “What?”
I’m so angry I can barely breathe. “You lying son of a bitch.”
He swallows and I see the first flicker of fear in his eyes that I’ve ever seen. He knows why I’m mad. Oh, he knows.
“I couldn’t find you,” he says, tripping over his words. “This morning you were gone. I searched everywhere. I tried to get in your head but . . . you put up those walls again. You have to stop putting up those walls, Ada. Stop blocking me out. Stop pushing me out. I’m only here to help you.”
“Bullshit!” I scream at him, getting to my feet and jabbing my finger into his chest. “You aren’t here to help me. You’re here to lie to me!”
His eyes bore into mine but I don’t care. I refuse to let him have that much power.
My refusal silences him.
“You told me it was a trick!” I yell. “You told me the demons were fucking with my head, that it wasn’t real, that she wasn’t in Hell, that she wasn’t hurt. But she is! They have her and you’ve been lying to me!” With that I push against his chest which surprisingly moves him back, rocks him on his feet.