The two older women give me a knowing smile and nod, while the younger three cheers their shot glasses and shoot them back.
“And there you have it,” Sophie says.
The next… however long we’re out there is spent with the women going back and forth between scolding me for letting Mike off the hook for this long and hyping me up to take care of the problem. By the time I leave, I have a lot to think about and try to plan.
26
Cece
“Can’t sleep?” I ask my sister from the table in Talon’s kitchen later that night. She lets out a squeak and fumbles with the full glass of water she just filled, soaking the front of her tee. “Sorry.” I get up and approach her, taking the glass from her hand and refilling it from the tap as she grabs a rag to clean up the mess. “I didn’t mean to scare you. I thought you saw me sitting here.”
“I didn’t,” she replies, taking her glass back when I hand it to her and downing it in just a few gulps. Once it’s empty, she fills it again, asking, “Why are you here?”
“We need to talk,” I say, but she doesn’t reply, so I just get right to it. “You’re right. I’ve let Mike off the hook for everything, and it’s not fair to me to let him continue on like he has. But more importantly, it’s not fair to our girls.” I sigh. “I know he should be more involved. I know I should demand more from him, but I’m afraid.”
“Of what?” she asks, her tone gentle.
“Of him stepping out of the picture completely, of him abandoning the girls like Dad abandoned us. I mean…” I shake my head, trying to keep my tears at bay. “I don’t ever want them to experience that. I don’t want them to ever feel like they are that easily forgotten.”
“Do you miss Dad?”
“What?” I heard her, but the question seems to come out of nowhere when I was so focused on Mike and the kids.
“Dad, our biological dad, do you miss him?”
“I never really think about him, to be honest,” I admit, and she closes her eyes.
“Don’t you see, Cece, that you can’t miss something you never had? Either Mike wants to be a part of his girls’ lives, or he doesn’t. Either he wants to make them a priority, or he doesn’t. Sharing DNA with a child doesn’t make you a parent. The bond built over time expressed through devotion and love does. I know you want what’s best for Ruby, Kate, and Lola, but wanting him to step up and be the father he should be isn’t going to make it happen.” She steps toward me as my shoulders slump forward in defeat. “I know you want what’s best for your babies, but letting Mike continue on like he has been isn’t giving them what they need. The girls need time with their dad, and you need to demand that he gives them that.”
I take a deep breath. I need advice on how I should go about talking to him about this. I don’t want to do anything that could cause him to come after me again. “I’m going to talk to my lawyer about how he thinks I should bring things up to Mike.”
She scoffs, and my head jerks back at her change in tone. “Do you know how ridiculous that sounds? Mike got an apartment without talking to you, introduced his girlfriend to the girls without talking to you, and now you’re going to talk to your lawyer about how you should talk to the father of your kids about something that affects you all?” She’s clearly disgusted. “Honest to God, you and Mike need to learn how to communicate with each other, because the girls are getting older, and there’s going to be things that come up with them that will require the two of you to be on the same page without using someone as a go-between.”
“You think I don’t know that?” I snap.
“I’m not saying you don’t know it, Cece. I’m asking what you’re going to do to change the way things are right now, because Mike isn’t going to be the one to address the issues, since he doesn’t have any issues to address. For him, everything is perfect. He’s living life like he always did, while everything for you has changed completely.”
I shake my head. “I wish things were as easy as you’re making them seem to be.”
“And I wish you’d understand that you’re making this harder than it needs to be. The conversation you need to have with him doesn’t have to be ugly or confrontational. It just has to be honest. Mike might not know what he’s doing is hurting the girls and making things more difficult for you, because you’ve never said anything to him. He might not think it’s a big deal that he only sees the girls one day a week, because he talks to them every night and is available if they call. You won’t know how he will react until you talk to him, and after that, if he doesn’t say he’s willing to work on things, then you talk to your lawyer. But I have a feeling you might be surprised by his reaction. Both of you love the girls, and both of you want what’s best for them. The two of you just need to learn how to talk to each other about stuff before it boils over.”