“The stuff we’ve been doing... Jesus, Lex, I thought you were experienced. Well, not experienced, but not a fucking innocent either.” He raked a hand roughly through his hair. “I fucked you with a paddle! Fuck.”
I rolled my eyes. “An innocent? What time period are we living in, Ian?”
“One where guys don’t just take what they want from naive women,” he snapped and then closed his eyes, rubbed a hand over his mouth. “I think I’m gonna be sick.”
“Don’t be so dramatic.” I rolled my eyes and got out of bed to join him, putting my hands on his chest and looking up into wary green eyes. “Everything we’ve done—every single thing—I’ve wanted. And not just because I think you’re handsome and I like you and want to make you happy.”
“You see?” he whispered. “You’ll do whatever I want because you want me.”
“Maybe,” I admitted, circling a finger along his chest. “But I don’t think I’d do something I feel strongly against just to please you. I’m not your lap dog.”
A smile tugged at his lips. “Lap dog, huh? I was going for sex slave.”
“You wish.”
He closed his eyes again, a look of pain flashing across his features. “I would have never... If I’d known you had never had sex before, I would have never done that. Any of it.”
“It wasn’t like it was my first time...something was inside me.” I blushed furiously. “I have used a dildo before.”
He shook his head. “It’s not the same.”
“No, it’s better. A whole hell of a lot better. In fact, I wouldn’t turn it down right now.”
Ian groaned and stepped back, away from me. “Don’t.”
“Seriously? You just fucked me, Ian. The damage is done. I’m no longer an ‘innocent’.”
He shook his head and looked away, a muscle twitching along his jaw. “I don’t understand. You were a virgin, but you acted so adventurous. Like you knew what you wanted.”
I shrugged and glanced down at my knotted fingers. “You brought that out in me. I know what I want when I’m with you, Ian. Girls are just as sexual as boys.” I peeked up through my lashes to see him relax a little.
“How are you feeling? Are you sore?”
“I’m perfectly fine.” Honestly, it hadn’t been the painful experience my sex-ed teachers had warned me about. “And before you ask, I’m on the pill.”
“Okay.” He exhaled and stepped forward, pulling me into his arms. “I’m sorry, Lex. I’m sorry I never thought to have the conversation with you.”
“I didn’t want to have the conversation,” I said into his chest. “I just knew you were the right person and wanted it to happen.”
He stepped back and took my face in both hands, looking deeply into my eyes. “You are so cool, do you know that? And it means a lot to me that I was your first. You mean a lot to me, Lex.”
“You mean a lot to me as well.”
He pulled me into a tight hug again, kissing the top of my head. As he did so, my stomach grumbled angrily, totally ruining the moment.
“You haven’t been feeding it again.” I could hear the amusement in his voice.
It was true—I’d been cooped up in the library all day, afraid to go to the cafeteria in case I ran into him. What a coward.
“I was too busy studying,” I lied.
“I’m starving now too. I’ll grab us dinner from the cafeteria.”
Taking my hand, he led me to the leather couch and pulled the matching black leather ottoman up to it. I sighed contentedly and sat down, stretching my legs out, and he covered me with a blanket before handing me the remote.
“Find a movie or something.”
There were so many choices. Ian had a PVR box with Video-on-Demand, Netflix, and other Smart TV movie channels. Not to mention hundreds of television channels. I was still scrolling through everything when he returned with a hot pizza. We set the box on the ottoman and snuggled together under the blanket while we watched Bridesmaids. I’d heard it was good, but I had no idea how good. I was laughing so hard, pineapple went up my nose. When I glanced at Ian, he was watching me with a smile playing on his lips.