"I love you too," he says with a smile.
"Good," I say firmly, and then turn so I can sit on his lap. He doesn't hesitate, swinging my legs up and turning me to the side. He carefully arranges the IV line so it doesn't get tangled, and then his arms wrap around me snugly. I lay my head on his chest and he kisses me on top of my head.
"I missed you," I say, rubbing my cheek against him.
"Never again, right?" he asks, his fingers stroking the skin on my arm.
"Never again," I agree. "Not getting rid of me."
"Damn right," he says. "We have our whole lives ahead of us."
"Yes," I say dreamily, confident in my future existence with this man. "We both have a whole lot of living to do."
Epilogue
Olivia
FORTY-ONE YEARS LATER
"Grandma...hurry up so we can cut the cake," Tamara squeals at me as she tugs on the hem of my dress.
Giving my hands a quick wash in the sink, I dry them and then turn to pick her up. Hoisting her little four-year-old body up high, I bring her back down to rest on my left hip. Yeah...I'm still pretty damn spry at sixty-six years of age.
"Want some cake, huh?" I ask as I tweak her on the nose.
She nods at me, her little blond ringlets bouncing up and down.
"Okay, but we have to find Grandpa," I tell her seriously.
"He's already sitting by the cake outside. He told me to come in and get you. Said to get your beautiful ass out there."
"He said what?" I ask in mock outrage.
"He said--" she starts to repeat, but I lean in and blow a raspberry on her neck to stop the words. One curse word is fine...two reinforces it in her vocabulary, and I don't want her preschool teacher freaking out and blaming her parents.
Tamara giggles as I walk out of the kitchen, through the large den, and out toward the back deck. I glance around our house, loving the country-chic flair that Garrett indulged me in when we bought it almost thirty years ago.
We settled in Denver, because after playing with the Cold Fury for seven years, he got traded to the Blue Devils and he lived out the rest of his hockey career here. By the time he retired, our kids were in middle school and we loved the area, so this is where we decided to stay. We still get back to North Carolina frequently to visit Alex and Sutton, and they come here a lot, but I miss them.
Stevie? Nothing to miss. He sold Fleurish, turning a very nice profit, and moved out to Denver three years ago with his love and life partner, Darren. They live a grand total of five miles from me and Garrett and I see him almost every day.
Stepping out on the back deck, I do a quick survey of my kingdom...of my living legacies sitting all around. My oldest, Felicity, so beautiful at age thirty-six, and the spitting image of her daughter, who I hold in my arms. Her husband, Ian, a funny Brit she met in college, sitting by her side and bouncing their son, Elijah, on his knee.
My eyes slide left, seeing my son, Mark, in a deep discussion with Stevie and Darren. He just turned thirty-two last week, as a matter of fact, and no doubt he and Stevie are arguing about politics. They are polar opposites when it comes to fiscal issues, but on the flip side, they are perfectly aligned on the social agenda. Mark is a pediatrician and practices here in Denver, and he's so busy, he never dates. I'm despaired of ever getting grandchildren out of him.
Finally, my eyes land on Lucas, our last child. He's thirty-one, and yes, we banged him out quickly after Mark, because we had set our limit at three. He has dark brown hair, just like his father, but has my murkier green eyes...more hazel than anything. Savannah, his wife, sits cuddled on his lap, and he rubs his hand over her swollen belly. Grandchild number three, and I cannot wait to see that little monkey.
Stepping down off the deck, I walk over and hand Felicity to her mother. Then I turn and walk over to the love of my life.
Garrett is still gorgeously handsome. He works out every day and still wears his hair a little long. His temples are streaked with some silver, but his eyes are still as bright and young as the day I met him.
Our life here in Denver is quiet. After he retired from hockey, he ended up going to college to get his degree and now teaches high school English. I'm not sure he'll ever retire from that, and it keeps him busy. I work part-time at a local flower shop, something I've continued to dabble in over the years. I took time off when the kids were younger, especially because of the way Garrett traveled so much for his career. We both felt it was important to keep them grounded.
My gaze captures Garrett's and he gives me a sly smile, crooking his finger at me. He's sitting in front of a large cake with the words Happy 40th Anniversary written on it in large, scripted letters.
I reach my husband and crawl straight onto his lap, relishing in the feel of his strong arms as they go around me.
"Hey, hot mama," he whispers in my ear. "I missed you."
I tilt my head and give him a soft kiss...a lingering kiss. "Hey, stud," I tell him with a smile, and Stevie calls out, "Hey...you two get a room."
Garrett leans his head up and calls out over me. "We will...as soon as you all get the hell out of our house."
Everyone laughs, including me, and I snuggle deeper into his embrace.
I'm feeling great. I'm healthy and whole.
My lymphoma was beaten into remission by Dr. Yoffman and has recurred only once, and that was more than twenty-five years ago. It scared the hell out of the kids, but somehow...somehow I just knew it was going to be okay. By then we were in Denver, and my oncologist here suggested a bone-marrow transplant.
I knew it was going to be okay because I had Garrett by my side. He never once let me feel sorry for myself, and because he was retired from hockey, and because he had more flexibility in his work schedule, he was able to finally be the one and only to take care of me throughout it all. It made him feel good. It made me feel better.
"And here we are," he says as he kisses my temple.
"Forty years. Can you believe it?"
"Seems like just yesterday we were hopping into bed on our first date. You were quite the seductress."
"Still am," I affirm.
"That you are," he says in a low rumble, a sound that never fails to make my heart race.
"Happy anniversary, baby," I tell him. "Best forty years of my life."
"Best of mine too. And we still have a lot of living still to do."
"Yes, we do, my love. Yes we do."
Acknowledgments
I'd like to dedicate this book to two very important people who helped me tremendously with my manuscript. First, my friend Jeanne Frazer, who has bravely battled through follicular B-cell lymphoma. I'm happy to say she's in remission, having kicked said cancer in the ass. She provided me with so much personal insight on what it's like to suffer this disease, and I cannot thank her enough for her candidness and support.
Second, to my friend Dr. Mark Yoffe, preeminent oncologist and fellow lover of Bernese mountain dogs. He patiently lectured me on follicular B-cell lymphoma, helping me to make this manuscript as medically accurate as possible. He even kindly invited me to his clinic to observe a bone-marrow aspiration and biopsy, but before I took him up on that offer, I watched a YouTube video of the procedure. Let's just say after the dizziness and queasiness passed, I had to, in turn, kindly decline.
Jeanne and Mark...you are both inspirations to me, and this book would never have been possible without you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I've lived through both of my parents having cancer. Serious cancer...both stage four...both given a very grim prognosis. My dad is still kicking twenty-three years later, and my mom is still kicking nine years later. I wanted to write a book where one of my main characters had cancer, because I wanted to point out that survival is possible...many times even probable. Cancer today is not always the big "C" that we have always feared. I wanted to show that there is hope and there can be a happily ever after.
While the particulars of follicular B-cell lymphoma and t
he treatment that Olivia underwent are medically accurate--and yes, her particular type of treatment often does not cause hair loss--I have had to take some minor liberties in the medical story line to make it all work.
BY SAWYER BENNETT
Cold Fury Hockey Series
Alex
Garrett
Zack (coming soon)
Stand-Alone Titles
If I Return
Uncivilized
The Off Series
Off Sides
Off Limits
Off the Record
Off Course
Off Chance
The Last Call Series
On the Rocks
Make It a Double
Sugar on the Edge
With a Twist (Coming Soon)