“Try me, Candi. Please, try me.” He ruthlessly jerked away when she tried to touch him, opening the door. “Get out.”
Candi ran out of the office, her high heels clicking the concrete as she left.
Calder didn’t watch which direction she went, closing the door and turning back to Stud.
“Bro, I’m sorry. I was going to talk to you when you came in this morning. I should have known that bitch wouldn’t wait to cause trouble. I made us an appointment to see Diamond. I’ve been saving for a place to stay. We can use my money to make sure you and Sex Piston don’t have to give her visitation—”
“Slow down, Calder. I already knew you knew about Star.”
“How?”
“When you and Crazy Bitch came to the house for pizza. Sex Piston and I overheard you two talking about Star.”
“Why didn’t you say something?”
“Why didn’t you?” Stud countered.
Calder rubbed his neck. “I didn’t know how. I still don’t know what to say to you. How do I say thank you for watching out for my kid, and then tell you that we should tell her? I didn’t want to hurt Sex Piston. I know how she is about Star—how you both are. I wanted to make sure I was strong enough not to relapse again. Every day I made through without using, I would tell myself that, if I make it another week without using, then I will talk to you about Star. Then another week would go by, and then another.”
“Is that what you want to tell her?”
“Yes. Crazy Bitch said it would hurt worse if she finds out for herself, and that we’ve been lying to her. I don’t want her any more hurt than she has to be. You and Sex….” Calder thought back to last night and realized Crazy Bitch was right. “We should all sit down and discuss the best way to do it and when.”
“I agree. I’ll call Sex Piston, and then all three of us can go to Diamond’s office to talk to her about the best way to handle Candi. You’re not going to oust her as an informant, so we need to find the best legal way to stop her from causing trouble.”
“And if there isn’t?”
Grimly, Stud didn’t hesitate. “Then I’ll oust her. This time, I won’t have to worry about you leaving town, and I don’t have to worry about her being pregnant with your child. She comes at me, trying to hurt those I love again… God help her. I will destroy her.”
“Stud…” Calder still couldn’t find the words to tell his brother how much he appreciated what he had done for him. Not only for Star, but the other past mistakes he had made and didn’t know how to atone for. “You deserve a better brother than I have been to you. I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you, but it’ll never equal what you’ve done for me. I’m sorry about Dad. I’m sorry about Reese—”
“Dad’s death wasn’t your fault. He started a fight with me before our race, trying to distract me and put me off my game. You tried to tell him you wanted to double-check that tire and he wouldn’t listen. He wanted that purse, but more importantly to him, he wanted to beat me. You were smarter than me. I wanted to race badly enough to put up with him; you gave up what you loved instead of letting him destroy the love of it like I did. That’s why I gave up racing. Not because of you, but because I didn’t love it anymore. And I didn’t love Reese. That’s why she found someone who could.
“You loved Star, so when you realized she was yours, you didn’t make waves by acknowledging it. You’ve sacrificed your love for her to make me and Sex Piston happy. Calder… I’m not the one who needs repaying. It’s us who owes you gratitude. You gave life to my daughter, that beautiful little girl who I have held in my arms and has given me such joy that I will never be able to repay your gift.”
Calder broke, his regrets shattered, raining down on him and cleansing his soul.
Stud jerked him to him when he couldn’t hold back his own tears any longer, seeing the tears in Calder’s eyes. Tears that had been held back too long. Tears for their mother’s death, for their father’s, for the years he had used drugs as an escape, the years they had been apart. The last ones they shared were of laughter that they were standing in his office, crying like babies, before breaking apart and slapping each other on their shoulders.
“It’s a little late, but congratulations on being a father,” Stud said, using the sleeve of his T-shirt to wipe his cheeks.