Propping an elbow on his knee and resting his chin in his hand, Graham stared into the white surroundings, wondering where the door was.
“Where do you want the door to be?” his mother asked.
“It’s highly uncomfortable knowing you’re doing that,” he told her. The knowledge that she was hearing what he thought instead of what he said had him hoping he could control his thoughts.
“As a boy, you were always so serious,” she said softly, a smile reflecting in her voice.
“I didn’t grow out of that, Mom.” He wondered if she had hoped he would.
“So I see,” she murmured. “But what a fine man you’ve become, Graham. You’ve made more than enough sacrifices in your life, done more than enough to earn your chance at peace.”
Damn, that wasn’t what he wanted to hear.
“I don’t think I’m ready for peace, Mom,” he said warily. “I’ve still got some fight left in me.”
“Do you?” his father asked. “I haven’t seen a lot of fight since you came back from Afghanistan. Even though the woman who died in your arms was a viper, still you let the memory of it hold you back from the place you know your heart belongs. That’s not fighting, son.”
Graham slid a slow look in his father’s direction. “It felt like a hell of a fight.”
Garrett Brock chuckled at the comment. “Love is sometimes the greatest battle a man can fight. You knew she wasn’t like the woman who tried to be her in an attempt to deceive you. You’ve always known she was right there, waiting for you, loving you. Perhaps the question I should ask is, why did you fight it?”
“What does Lyrica have to do with this
place?” The white peace was too encompassing. Too peaceful. And he didn’t see a Mackay in sight.
Life without Mackays would be boring, he thought morosely, realizing the part they’d played in his life for so long.
“Those boys promised me the day you were born that they would always look out for you if I were to leave your life,” his father revealed. “They’ve done well. But it’s not the Mackays in general you’d miss, is it, boy?”
He hated it when his father called him boy. It meant he was disappointing him.
“To return is to face her,” his mother said then, her voice gentle. “Having you with us would complete the circle we began in that life. But it would not complete the circle you were meant to build, Graham. Which choice will you make?”
The whiteness slowly receded. It became a world washed in color, in sight and sound and scents that were incredibly sharp and focused.
He still sat. He was in the garden his father had created for the wife who so loved the sight and scent of flowers. He sat on one of the chair-size boulders, his position the same, chin resting in his palm as he watched the most incredible sight.
It was beautiful.
As he watched, the peace that suffused him was far greater than even that of the perfect white peace where his parents had come to him. It was soul deep. It was wonder and beauty; it was a perfection he’d never imagined existed.
“Mine?” he whispered, awed, so taken aback by what he was seeing that it was all he could do to contain his emotion.
“Yours,” his mother whispered, her own voice thick with emotion now. “You knew it was happening. You’ve sensed it. Isn’t it the most wondrous sight, Graham? Is this really what you want to leave? Is this what you want to continue to run from? If it is, then you can have that as well.”
“No!” He jumped to his feet to hold on to the image, anger crashing through him at the knowledge that it was leaving, that it was being taken from him. “Make it stay!”
He turned to his parents, wild with the loss pouring through him, his heart racing as he’d never felt it before, a sense of pain clenching at his chest and arm.
“Only you can make it stay, son,” Garrett said softly, somberly. “Only your choice can bring it back.”
Turning, Graham willed it back, fought for it, snarled with furious determination as the white slowly morphed again, and the image returned.
Stepping closer, he felt tears fill his eyes.
Going to one knee, he reached out, touched her face, brushed his thumb over her lips as she slept.
Then his gaze returned to the children sleeping beside her.