Lowering her face into her hands, she mutters, “Oh my fucking god.”
“You’ll be saying that later tonight,” I snicker.
She looks back up at me. “James, you just don’t get it, do you?”
“Sophia, I’m good at my job. I’m careful, and if the worst does happen… Know that I…”
I immediately shut up and stop talking.
I can see those words I was about to speak hit her in a way that she doesn’t want to feel right now.
Looking down at her lap, she asks quietly, “Why did you let him take me?”
“Sophia, if I could have stopped them from taking you all, I would have,” I say.
“No, not them. Him. Why did you let Simon take me?” she asks quietly.
Oh.
Damn.
“Because… It’s complicated…” I say.
“How?”
“If I would have done what I wanted to, this conversation would be happening seven months ago. I would have taken you to my home and tried to make you mine right then and there. But I was ordered to let you go. I was forced to let you go, and it’s been the biggest mistake I’ve ever made,” I say and shake my head.
“Why?” she asks.
“Because I’ve been in hell since we first kissed. I won’t lie to you, ever. Just like you asked me not to. I was with women before you. Many women. Not once in all of my life have I ever felt what I did the moment our lips touched. Not once.”
I take her cheeks in my hands and rub my thumb gently across the lips that started so many nights of torment and longing.
“Never have I felt the way I do now. This isn’t puppy love or infatuation. This is an all-consuming want of you. To have you as mine. To be yours. I know you, Sophia. I know the way you are. I… I’ve watched you from afar for so long it still hurts,” I say, and I can feel that rage still in the back of my head.
The rage of being separated from her.
“I love you,” I say quietly. “I’ve loved you since the moment I kissed you in Elim Park.”
“James, you can’t say that!” She shakes her head at me. “You can’t!”
My phone buzzes multiple times from at least three texts coming in then it starts to ring.
I want to throw the fucking thing away. I want to break it into the millions of pieces my heart is in. But I slowly let my hands drop from her face and look down to the phone.
It’s Gabriel calling.
And the texts are from Lucifer and Simon.
Fuck the world and everything outside of this house.
We both look at the phone while it rings.
I don’t want this.
I don’t fucking want this.
Pushing the connect button, I get that sense of dread I feel from time to time.
“What happened?” I ask as I put the call on speakerphone.
“Michael’s dead. Someone took a shot at Amy,” Gabriel says in his deep gravelly voice.
“What do you mean took a shot?” I ask quietly as I look up to see Sophia’s eyes widen.
“They sniped him from half a mile out with a large caliber round,” he says. “They were aiming for Amy while she was out with the kids. Michael was on duty. Either the sniper fucked up and missed the shot or Michael felt something. Amy says he moved her out of the way, said, ‘Sorry, ma’am,’ then she was coated in his blood.”
“Dammit,” I say, and my stomach sinks.
Michael wasn’t a blooded brother yet, but he was our guardian out there for the women and children.
Fuck.
“Is that why I’m getting texts?” I ask.
“Partially. The police have also raided three of our businesses over the last eight hours. They didn’t show any search warrants and were extremely violent with the employees,” Gabriel growls.
“What do you mean no warrants?” Sophia asks quickly.
Gabriel pauses. “Who’s speaking?”
“It’s Sophia, my wife,” I say before she can respond.
“I’m not his wife,” Sophia growls at me.
“Yet,” I say with a wink at her. I want to smirk, but I just don’t have it in me. “She’s in the family now, Gabriel, on my authority.”
“On your head,” he warns then continues. “No search warrants were produced, and there are no official records of the raids. They hit the Tiger’s Lounge and slapped around the girls. Beat the shit out the manager. They also went through a laundromat we haven’t done anything with in three years. And they hit Lucifer’s office in the city. Trashed it and tried to beat the secretary unconscious.”
“What the fuck?” I ask.
“Yeah, none of what they hit really hurts us,” he says, “They took some hard drives, but it’s all useless information.”
“They start following everyone yet?” I ask.
“Not as of right now,” Gabriel says.
“Who’s heading all this shit?” I ask.
I look at Sophia because I know the answer and I bet she does too.