“You needed help.”
He scowled at me. “You put yourself in danger.”
“I did. Knowing you were in danger gave me the courage to help you. I did something I never ever thought I would do, and I did it for you.” I climbed from the bed and approached him as I spoke. “Punish me if that’s what you need to do, but I would do the same thing again. I will never stand by and let someone hurt you.”
I lowered myself to my knees and placed my hands behind my back. I needed him to understand I was here for him, ready to accept what he needed to give.
32
Lucien
I looked down at the incredible man who knelt before me, the man I loved. It had been easy to say the words earlier when he was asleep, but now, as he looked up at me expectantly, they wouldn’t come. He thought he wasn’t brave, but he was incredibly strong, stronger than me. He’d kept it together so well the night he’d rescued me. Even men like me who grew up in a crime family often struggled after their first kill, though not that many of us would admit it. I knew Peter was shaken, but Sabrina had assured me he was handling it well, and he was here. He hadn’t tried to run. Instead of being afraid of me now, he was ready to give me what I needed.
He was right; I did need to punish him. I needed him to know how scared I’d been for him. I didn’t explain any of that. I just pulled out my cock, stepped closer to him, and slid my fingers into his hair. He opened his mouth, and I fed him every inch of my cock.
He gagged, but he didn’t pull away. I held him there, making him submit, because I needed to know he would, and I was as sure as I could be that he needed that too.
He sucked in air when I pulled out, but I only gave him a few seconds before demanding, “More.”
Peter brought his hands to my thighs, but I grabbed his wrists. “Keep them behind your back. I’m controlling this. Your mouth is mine.”
He looked up at me, eyes dark with need. “Yes, sir.” His words might be subservient, but there was a smile on his face that made me think he was humoring me. “Use me, Lucien. I’m here for you.”
I drove back into his mouth, making him choke on my cock again before fucking his mouth ruthlessly. He took it all, swallowing around me, sucking and humming. I had to fight to keep from spilling my load. I wasn’t ready for that yet.
Finally, I let him go, stepped back, and pulled him to his feet. He drew in ragged breaths while staring up at me.
“Don’t ever say you’re not brave again.”
“Yes, sir.”
“You knew I would punish you for defying me, didn’t you?”
“Yes, but I also knew you would never truly hurt me.”
“You scared me when I couldn’t find you, and when I saw you holding that gun… If any of those men had chosen to stand with Damian, I could have been burying you today, not standing here with you.” I swiped at my eyes. I was not fucking crying. I grabbed my whiskey and drained the rest of it. “Don’t ever scare me like that again.”
“I can’t promise that because I will always choose to save you if I can, but I can promise that I won’t leave you, and I will always obey you when we’re together like this.”
“Because you want a protector, and you need someone to surrender to?”
Peter shook his head. “No, because I love you.”
I closed my eyes for a moment. When I tried to speak, my voice cracked. Peter laid a finger over my lips. “I know. I knew that day at the barn. Punish me, Lucien. It’s what we both need.”
I wrapped a hand around the back of his neck and pushed him against the wall. He caught himself on his hands splaying his fingers, then arching his back and wiggling his ass at me. I’d never needed anything like I needed him then.
I grabbed the waistband of his pajama pants and ripped the fabric in two. They slid down his legs. He wasn’t wearing anything underneath. I slapped his bare ass hard. He groaned and arched his back more deeply. I smacked him again and again. His ass turned bright red under my blows, and his skin warmed.
“You need this, don’t you? You need to remember how important it is to obey me.”
“Yes, Lucien. I need to know you care, that you’ll always take control, that you’ll give us both what we need.”
“Fuck right I will.” I kept going, spanking him even harder. He whimpered and whined, but he took every blow and begged for more. I wrapped a hand around his cock and stroked him while I brought my blows down on the reddest part of his ass. He thrust into the circle of my fingers, and I used his precum to slick him up so my hand slid more easily along him.