I turned the sink on, wetting the cloth. I focused on my legs, first checking for dirt, wiping away any and using the hand soap on the counter to wash properly.
It was a slow process since I forced myself into a daze, the sound of the shower echoing around me.
If I hurried, I could get out of here quickly enough.
Washing my hair was more difficult. Once I made my hair wet, I realized I couldn’t get to the shampoo. That was in the shower.
I couldn’t go in there.
I stood there, wet hair dripping into the sink and contemplating my next step. Thinking was made difficult as my brain could only function on a basic level as I tried to not focus on the shower running behind me.
At first, I considered opening a new shampoo bottle that might be in the closet, but then I remembered the boys kept kits below the sink.
I bent down, opening a kit and finding someone’s shampoo which I used to wash my hair. From the ponytail holders inside, I suspected it was Luke’s.
I did everything I could, even shaving, simply by using the supplies I’d found under the sink.
Then I realized my final problem. The shower was still running. There was no way I could reach in and turn off the water. I’d have to go into the stall to turn it off, and I was sure I wouldn’t be able to. It was too close.
I wrapped myself in one of the big towels and made up an excuse. I opened the door an inch and called out for Kota.
He came quickly from the direction of the kitchen. He’d rolled up the sleeves of the sweatshirt. “Everything okay?” he asked and then stopped in his tracks when he saw me in the towel.
I was covered pretty well. Maybe I should have gotten dressed first. I was getting used to Gabriel being around whenever I was getting dressed, and I was already embarrassed by what I was about to ask him. I hadn’t thought about him seeing me in the towel.
Heat radiated through my cheeks and I secured the towel with my arms over my chest. “I can’t seem to turn the shower off,” I said quietly. Technically true. I’d meant to add that perhaps the knob was slippery, but after a long pause, I couldn’t get myself to continue.
Kota looked on toward the shower. “Is it stuck?”
I shrugged. “I’m sorry,” I said. “I tried.” More than he realized.
Kota entered, pushing the door back but leaving it open an inch. He stepped around the half wall, using the edge to hang on to as he leaned into the shower, avoiding the spray as much as possible. He twisted the knob and the water stopped.
“There,” he said. “Maybe it was a little slippery. Did you turn it right or left? You have to turn it all the way to the right and down.”
I blew out a breath of relief, mostly because the shower was off, and also because Kota had accepted that I’d had trouble with the faucet.
Emotion was weighing on me and I just wanted to get ready for the day. “Sorry,” I said.
Faint footsteps echoed in the hallway like someone was trying to tiptoe around.
Kota tensed, turning toward the door and stepping out in the hallway. “Who’s there?”
“Hey,” came Silas’s voice, deep and reverberating against the walls. “Kota, you should come out and see this.”
“Hang on a second,” Kota said, his shoulders relaxing. “Just helping Sang.”
“She should come see this, too.”
I shared an intense look with Kota, curious and wondering why Silas hadn’t included me when he entered. Hadn’t he seen us standing in the doorway?
Had he been trying to give us some privacy?
I let out another breath and then nodded to Kota. “Go out,” I said. “I’ll get dressed and catch up.”
“We’ll be right outside,” he said. He reached for my head, kissed my brow, and then released me. I heard his footsteps getting quieter as he headed through the kitchen and toward the front door.
When I heard the door shut, I closed myself in the bathroom and proceeded to get dressed. I brushed my hair out as well as I could, but while it was still wet, I threw it all into a clip and secured it.
Once I was ready, I went to the kitchen and paused. Did I want to know? I did, of course. Something told me that if it was nothing, Silas wouldn’t have bothered to come inside and ask us to look.
I pulled the front door open. Kota was right at the step, blocking me from exiting, holding his hands up. Silas was behind him, with a confused look on his face, dark eyes questioning me. He was dressed in a dark sweater and jeans and black boots, a look that almost mimicked North’s. His expression was almost as grave as North’s, too.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“We don’t know,” Kota said. He reached out for my wrist and then tugged me outside. “We came back to get you.”
I swallowed down my sudden trepidation and allowed Kota to pull me out to the walkway. Once we were in view of the street, he stopped and turned toward me, his eyes only focused on my face. “Look behind me, at your house.”
I sucked in a breath and focused, looking around his shoulder toward the two-story gray house a couple lots down from Nathan’s. I’d passed by the house so many times, not paying it any attention since it always looks the same, the only occasional difference being if the garbage had been taken to the street that day.
Otherwise, it looked empty it was too big a house for one person. Not that I saw Marie these days.
But now, the house had all the lights on and the windows were open. On a cold day like today, it seemed an odd thing to do.
I stared at the house, trying to figure out why when Marie appeared at the door inside the garage. She came down the steps with giant bags of trash. She wore a sweater and jeans and her long brown hair was tied back into a ponytail. From the distance, I couldn’t tell her expression.
They wanted me to watch her taking out trash? And why did she have the windows open?
Then I noticed Derrick behind her, also carrying trash bags. He walked around her quickly and lifted the lid to the bin. It was already full to the top with bags. The trash collection wouldn’t be on this block for another few days yet.
They shoved the bags down as far as they could. As Derrick closed the lid, it remained ajar, overflowing with bags peeking out. They didn’t seem concerned and shuffled back into the house, closing the door behind them.
“They’re...cleaning,” I said, staring at the closed door and then at the windows.
“Yeah,” Kota said. He still kept his eyes on me, even though I could tell he really wasn’t looking. He was thinking. “It looked like they were deep cleaning. Doing a lot more than usual.”
Silas had come over to stand next to me and while his head tilted toward Kota, his eyes were on the house. “Why?” he asked. “And why now?”
I shrugged. “Maybe she realized if she had the house to herself, she’s the only one who can keep it clean.”
“Maybe Derrick said he wouldn’t come over again unless she cleaned,” Silas said with a small smile. “He’s never been messy. Maybe he’d had enough.”
“Let’s keep an eye on them,” Kota said and turned toward his house. “When someone’s out of a routine, there’s usually a reason. Let’s just make sure it is just a change of heart about a clean house, and not something else.”
I couldn’t imagine what other reason there might be, other than... “Kota,” I said quietly. “My stepmother. Is she...would she be sent home for the Christmas holidays? Is she well enough to come back?”
“Not yet,” he said. “Although we might have to face that soon. Dr. Green would have alerted us if there were going to be changes to her situation. Last time I checked in with him about it, he said she was recovering but her mental state was still off with all the medications she is on. The doctors are trying to work with her. Otherwise, she might come home with the same pills, and fall into overdosing herself again. She does need medication for her condition, possibly for the rest of her life. But if she can stabilize and not take more than what is needed, she can be s
omewhat normal.”
“Whatever her normal is,” I said quietly. I couldn’t help it. My stepmother had been sick for so long, it was hard to remember what she was like before that time.
If she got better, would she regret what she’d done to me?