He paused, turning to me, his eyebrows up in another curious look. He leaned in, bringing his face close so he could whisper. “It’s not you, is it?”
“I don’t know yet.”
Silas’s lips tightened in the corners. “What’s going on?”
“I don’t think it’s bad. We’re just scattering. We’re trying to see who this person following us is most interested in.”
“Oh,” he said. “North and I need to move?”
“No,” I said. “If you need to get ready, I can wait out here.”
“We’re running a little early. I’ll wait with you.”
I preferred that. “How ... how’s it going?” I asked, trying to find something to talk about.
He glanced behind his shoulder, as if checking to see if anyone was watching. He turned back to me and then stepped forward.
I didn’t know what he was doing, and I backed up to give him room.
My back met the wall. I stopped short, my palms against the cool painted brick. My cheeks heated, embarrassed to have been so clumsy.
Silas’s smile broadened. He lifted his arm and then rested it above my head against the wall. The mass of muscle of his bicep flexed, drawing my attention to it so I turned my head. I knew he was a big guy, but being so close now, he seemed massive.
He leaned in, and with my head turned, his lips traced my ear. “Sorry,” he said, his voice deep; a bit of the Greek accent filtered through. “If I don’t look like I’m trying to make out with you in the hallway, they’ll be on my ass wondering why I wasn’t.”
“Oh,” I said, still frozen. “Should I stay like this?”
“If you want,” he said. He was quiet for a moment, but still really close. “You okay?”
“Yes,” I said quietly. And I was. I kind of liked it. It was like he was covering me from anyone watching us. I slowly turned my face and he backed his head up enough that I could look at those big brown eyes without crossing mine. “So we’re still ... uh, together?” I asked. “You’re still my boyfriend?”
“Yeah,” he said. “Don’t worry about the guys. I’ll handle them. Unless you want to go out with someone else.”
“No,” I said quickly, in an almost defensive tone. I meant to suggest it was okay we were fake boyfriend and girlfriend, but then realized I probably sounded like I wanted it to be this way.
I kind of didn’t mind. I’d never had a boyfriend before. Even if this was fake, at least I got to pretend. Maybe he was right, it kept other boys off my back and he got to use me as an excuse not to date anyone else.
Deep down, I preferred that, as selfish as it was. At least for now.
He grinned. His other arm lifted, coming up near the other one to press against the wall and he leaned in on me. Silas was enveloping me.
His nose came close and it was hard to look at him again. “Probably should have asked you first,” he said. “It came up one day. One of the guys was trying to see who you were dating and wanted to know how North and I talked to you so he could ask you out.”
“Rocky?”
He grunted. “No, actually, someone else.”
I wanted to know who, but outside of Jay and Rocky, I didn’t know anyone else on the football team.
“Told them we were dating,” he said. “Sorry. Probably should have said someone else. Wasn’t really thinking.”
“Don’t worry about it,” I said. “Simpler for both of us.”
He nodded. His head tilted and he stopped with his nose touching mine. “Still going out with the trio this weekend?”
“With Gabriel and the others? Yes.”
One of the hands above me pressed down against my head, steadying me. “I asked you out once,” he said. “Never got a chance to take you anywhere.”
“Did you want to go?” I asked, thinking of Gabriel who once felt left out. “North said you were going to be busy and you were right there, but I should have asked you if you wanted...”
“Not to a club,” he said. “Not the type.”
I wasn’t sure I was the type either. “Maybe... maybe when baseball season starts again, we can watch a game.” It was late October and I think we missed our window to watch the World Series together like we once said we would. What a mess! Here I was trying to figure out how to wedge time in with Silas. He’d been busy, too, with football and school and Academy things. I made a mental note to call him more.
He was quiet for a long moment, and then he turned his head. I sensed the warmth of his lips hovering just over mine. “Do we have to wait that long?” he asked.
My heart thundered in my ear, and my hands gripped at the wall behind me. I couldn’t back my head away. “Probably not,” I breathed.
He held his lips still, and being so close, I was blinking hard, unable to look so close at him and feeling awkward keeping my eyes closed for too long.
But he didn’t move. He simply hovered over my lips. Pretending?
I sensed something else, too. He wasn’t just doing this for show. No one could see what we were doing anyway. He was simply waiting.
For me?
I didn’t dare move. I was having a heart attack while being as stock-still as I could be. I held my breath, waiting and any time I did breathe, I sucked in air slowly and held, getting a lung-full of ocean breeze, a cologne scent he carried. I couldn’t get myself to do anything, afraid I was getting the wrong impression.
A noise up the hallway near the locker room startled me, and I turned my head slightly. He groaned and his hand above me started tightening to keep me still.
“Don’t let them ruin this,” he said.
“Sorry,” I said. “I...”
His face tilted. His lips were briefly touching my own. It wasn’t a kiss. Just a touch, his broad lower lip crossing the front of mine. Then I was afraid to speak because doing so had my lips shifting around his.
I was petrified. What was I supposed to do? Wasn’t a kiss supposed to be puckering lips? Maybe he was waiting for me to do that. But my muscles in my lips didn’t dare. I wanted him to do it first. I didn’t want to get it wrong.
The longer I waited, the more it felt like he was waiting for me.
“Aggele,” he said softly. His lip glided over mine as he spoke.
Okay, so I couldn’t kiss him first on the lips. I got that. He was hovering, though, not moving closer. Maybe this was part of kissing. Was this as close as the guy gets before the girl did something? Maybe I just didn’t know how to kiss.
So I twisted my head as far as he would let me, puckered, and ended up pressing out so that I could get the cheek, close to his chin. I wanted to kiss and see what would happen; I thought if I just got close enough, he’d maybe show me what to do next.
Silas grunted and then tilted his head, his lips meeting with my cheek as he spoke against me. “You’re killing me.”
I let out something like a soft moan, frustrated that I couldn’t figure out what he wanted. I mean, I thought I knew, but... why was this so complicated? I was killing him? I didn’t know what I was doing and I thought he would understand that and show me.
His hand slid down until he was cupping one side of my face, and his broad lips kissed my cheek, putting pressure against my face. I closed my eyes tight, trying to forget where we were.
His lips trailed back against my face, toward the jaw, and to a soft spot just below my ear.
I didn’t want to say it. I wanted to wait and see if he would do anything else, but I felt compelled to let him know because I didn’t want him to be surprised, “Nathan will show up in a minute.”
Silas groaned so hard that I felt the vibration through his lips. He backed up his head, looking down at me.
Those dark eyes were such a shock that I was instantly regretting having spoken. He said it was killing him, and his face was scrunched, his eyes telling me that he wasn’t exaggerating. He’d wanted something and I was who he wanted it from. “He probably shouldn’t come down here,” he said.
The way he
said it sent a chill through my heart. Something else was wrong. “Why not?”
“Sang?”
Silas dropped his hand from my head and I turned, spotting Nathan coming down the hallway. He looked like he was trying to hurry.
There was a lot of sound at once. There were shouts from inside the locker room, but not like anyone was fighting. More like the onlookers from before were calling people’s attention to the hallway.
Silas backed away from me and started bellowing as well. He pointed at Nathan. “Get out of here! She’s not talking to you.”