“You’re in my English class,” Kota said.
Nathan moved closer to me and held his paper next to mine. He was close enough that I was breathing in the scent of cypress and leather. I tried to focus and compare.
“Just geometry and gym,” I said. “But in gym the boys and girls separated aren’t they?”
“We’ll mix up sometimes, I bet. Besides, we’re all in the same gym. I’ll wave to you. Maybe.”
Kota’s phone rang on his desk and he answered it. After a few minutes he hung up. “All schedules are accounted for. They’re heading in now.”
Nathan’s blue eyes locked with mine. His reddish brown hair was a little mused but I found it to be charming. He grumbled. “And so it starts...”
I used Kota’s restroom as the guys went downstairs to wait on the others. I adjusted my cut off blue jean shorts a little lower on my hips and pressed my hands to smooth out my blouse, pulling out the lower hem so the length fell over the pockets of my shorts. I kept readjusting the buttons on my blouse, buttoning and unbuttoning the collar to figure out what looked better. There were thin spots in the material and I was sure my father bought it at a used clothing shop. The guys always looked so good. I simply couldn’t compare. I was combing my fingers quickly through my hair when I heard a car rolling into the drive. I threw my hair into a twist and clipped it. No time to fiddle with it. The boys were here.
I ran downstairs and out into the living room. Kota held open the front door, pushing his glasses up his nose. In a line came Victor, Luke, Gabriel, North and Silas. While they were all dressed casually, casual for the guys was a different level. Polo shirts, clean slacks, button up shirts with collars. Everything looked new and I spied Hilfiger and Abercrombie logos. It made me feel like a complete slob in my old things. I shifted on my feet on the blue carpet of the living room, my hands going behind my hips to hide any nervous shaking.
The others greeted Kota and Nathan in the hallway. Silas was the first to spot me. Locks of his black hair hung around his eyes and he brushed it aside, smiling at me. He came close, towering over me and pulled from his back pocket his envelope. “Hey look, they let me in.”
I giggled. His smile widened, his clean white teeth a contrast to his olive skin.
We collected in Kota’s living room. I sat in the middle of the couch. North, dressed in black with a single gold hoop earring, sat to my left, Gabriel wearing a bright orange shirt and blue crystal studs in his ears, sat to my right. Their contrasting styles had me glancing from one to the other, pondering how they managed to stay friends when they seemed so different. The others sat on the floor in a circle facing us. It felt strange to be higher up than everyone else but they didn’t seem to notice.
I blushed as North casually put an arm behind my shoulders against the couch cushions. I peeked up at his tan face. His dark eyes caught mine quickly and I glanced away. While I knew he wouldn’t hurt me, his eyes were so intense it had my insides vibrating.
“I vote we get bean bag chairs,” Luke said. He might have been North’s step brother, but Luke’s long blond hair loosely hung around his shoulders, and his smile was warm and always ready to laugh. He leaned back on his hands as he sat with his legs crossed on the floor. “If we’re going to have meetings here, we need something besides the floor.”
“We’re working on that,” Kota said.
North’s fingers traced small circles at my shoulder. I glanced at the others to see if they noticed but they were watching Kota. I tried not to blush. This was normal, right? I told myself he was just being friendly and willed my heart to still.
“Now that we have schedules, let’s start at the beginning,” Kota said, getting the attention of everyone in the room quickly. “Or rather, let’s start with getting there.”
“I’ve got Gabriel,” said Victor, fiddling with the silver medallion at his neck.
“We’re good,” North said. “Luke and I can grab Silas.”
“Good. Logically, I’ll take Nathan and Sang,” Kota said.
“You mean on the bus?” I asked. They all looked at me. I felt my cheeks radiating heat. “I mean I don’t think I could get away with riding to school with anyone. If I’m not getting on the bus, my sister will know and she’d tell my parents.”
“Aw, shit,” Nathan said. “I didn’t think about that. Don’t tell me we’re riding this year.”
I held up my hand toward him. “You don’t have to. I mean I can ride the bus. You guys can ride together. It’s no big deal. I’ll just see you when I get there.”
The group exchanged glances. I caught Luke’s gaze as he stared at me, his blond hair falling in front of his dark eyes. I wasn’t sure if he realized he was doing it or maybe he was just staring out into space but happened to be looking in my direction. When he came back, he started blinking his brown eyes and held a dazzling smiling. His striking face had distracted me from watching the others. Did he do that on purpose?
“It’s not a big deal,” Nathan said, falling back on the carpet, putting his hands behind his head to prop it up. “We’ll do it.”
“But,” I started to say. It just seemed too unfair. It wasn’t a big deal to me. It was just a bus ride.
Kota cut me off. “No, it’s fine. My car isn’t totally reliable anyway. We’ll ride.”
I pursed my lips. His easy excuse to make me feel better left me feeling uneasy. The others simply nodded, taking Kota’s lead. When Kota finalized a plan, everyone went through with it. It was hard for me to believe the guy who appeared to be one of the least aggressive; the least likely leader had come to the role he had developed.
“But that brings us to another issue,” Kota said. His fingers brushed away the neatly-trimmed brown hair against his forehead. “We need to work on getting your parents used to us. It’ll be difficult but the sooner we find a way, it’ll make it easier on all of us.”
I bit my tongue to keep from saying something. I’d told him before I liked the way things were working now. My father didn’t come home until very late in the evening, often well after eight when I was already up in my room and I didn’t see him at all. My mother, who was ill, kept mostly to her room. I checked in once a day and for the most part, I could escape outside. If she did ask where I had gone, I would rattle off different things; in the woods, the garage, taking a walk to the empty church down the road. In our old neighborhood back in Illinois, I often took walks outside. Since the closest kid lived a couple of miles away, my mother eventually relaxed to let me walk in the woods near the house. Marie told me they bought our new house here on Sunnyvale Court because it was the least crowded street within an hour’s drive of where my dad worked. It was a last minute purchase and my mother wasn’t happy about it, but it did have a lot of wooded areas. So far, she hadn’t questioned my going for walks. She only reminded me that I shouldn’t talk to anyone. My mom would eventually realize how many kids were on this street. I didn’t want to think about the restrictions she would impose once she found out. I needed to be more careful, though. I had to show up more around the house on occasion.
Gabriel reached out to my head, rubbing at my hair. I held back from cringing out of fear. I enjoyed their touches but they were always so unexpected and when they did it quickly, my first reaction was usually to back up as I was always sure they didn’t mean to or it was an accident. “Don’t worry,” he said, his thin fingers massaging my scalp. “We’ve got a plan.” He let go of me and turned his head to Kota. “We’ve got a plan, right?”
Kota brushed his own fingers through his hair “I still think we ought to call on Danielle. If we can get them to be friends, she could inv
ite Danielle over. Her mother might get used to another girl being over there easier and we could slowly start showing up.”
There was a collective groan.
“Is she that bad?” I asked.
“Yup,” North said, his voice deep. His fingers stopped the gentle motion at my shoulder and simply rested against me. It wasn’t exactly that he had his arm around me. It just felt like two fingers touching me. I kept telling myself to cool off. Would my heart always pound so much around them?
“She’s a typical girl,” Nathan tried to explain. “She thinks we’re all a bunch of nerds.”
Gabriel nudged my arm with his and leaned into me to stage whisper near my ear, “Nathan used to have a crush on her.”
“Fuck, no, I didn’t.”
“She used to go over to his house,” Gabriel continued. “One day she tried to get him to skinny dip in the pool. When he refused, she got pissed and told everyone he was gay for a while.”
“Like I give a shit what she thinks,” he said, but he frowned and rolled onto his side on the carpet, covering his eyes with an arm. “Can we not talk about this right now?”
Kota cleared his throat. “Well, maybe something else will come up.” He pulled out his schedule and unfolded the paper. “Are we ready?”
It took a good hour between us to get organized. Most of that time was taken up by general talking among the guys and Kota had to remind them what they were trying to do. Kota kept notes on a sheet of paper. In the end, my own schedule was marked up with his writing.
Homeroom Room 135
Luke, North
AP English - Trailer 10 - Ms. Johnson
Kota, Gabriel, Luke
AP Geometry - Room 220 - Ms. Smith
Nathan, North
Violin - Music Room B - Mr. Blackbourne
None
AP World History - Trailer 32 - Mr. Morris