“For what it’s worth—” My head turns in Xena’s direction. She’s still standing exactly where I left her at the lip of the hallway. “I thought he was going to change, too.”
With that little piece of information I could’ve gone the rest of my entire life without hearing, she leaves me alone.
I want to press my ear to the door, or walk away and pretend nothing happened. I want to find Ronan and fuck him in front of everyone still left in the living room, but each one of those choices gives him power. They give him the ability to turn this situation back on me.
My resolve only wavers for a second as I reach for the doorknob, but knowing I’ve been facing disappointment my entire life forces me to twist my hand.
The sight of Lynch standing with his cock barely out of his jeans and buried in some girls mouth isn’t unexpected, but the flash of unfamiliar red hair makes me take pause.
She’s new.
She’s not one of the girls I’ve grown to love on her knees for the Ravens Ruin President.
They aren’t betraying me. He’s simply getting the first piece.
Just like me.
Just like Legs that same night.
This is protocol.
This is how it’s always been.
How it will always be.
I push away the voice that tells me he’s been different recently when his eyes snap up to mine.
“Zoe,” he hisses.
My heart clenches at the sound of my real name.
His voice is filled with emotion, but his eyes, the portals to his dark soul are filled with censure. His hand grips the fiery red strands harder, his hips bucking deeper.
“Okay.” I swallow and give him a quick nod.
Dark green eyes search my face. I know my disappointment is clear. No matter how guarded my heart is, no matter how much strength I’ve gained at the sight of him driving his dick down some unknown girl’s throat, it’s impossible to hide it.
“It’s only fair right?” My spine strengthens, the act quickly draining every ounce of reserved energy I can manage. “I sucked off the prospect.”
His grip tightens further on the girl, enough that she whimpers. A little pride somehow seeps in when he loosens his hold on her. Even in this state, even with hate filling his eyes, he won’t hurt her.
“Zoe,” he says again as his jaw tenses. A hefty grunt rumbles from his chest, and I know he’s found his release.
It’s nothing I haven’t seen before. Vixen sucked him off in front of me weeks ago. The sight turned me on. This shouldn’t be any different, but, somehow, it is.
The huge difference, the one I’ll remember every waking moment for the rest of my life, is that he doesn’t say a word when I turn and walk away. He doesn’t command me to come back. He doesn’t follow me into the hall to make excuses or try to explain.
To my surprise, the tears I was certain would fall don’t come either.Chapter 29Lynch
“You look like shit,” Briar says on a yawn as he joins me on the front porch.
I ignore him, choosing instead to keep my focus on the trees in the distance. The sun is only hinting its approach, turning the horizon the faintest hints of pink and orange. It may be the only thing keeping me from hurting him. I was on a dangerous path last night. The way things turned out may have been the least harmful, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have an ache in my chest that has kept me up all night.
“How was the redhead?”
My jaw tenses, hardening to the point I feel like my teeth may crack.
I can’t blame my VP for giving me exactly what I asked for. I placed the order after leaving Candi in my bed upstairs. I was trying to find a way to turn off the thoughts in my head, get rid of the uncontrollable feelings I was having for her. The same damn thing happened last night. I held her against me and wanted to stay. I wanted her to stay. I wanted her to want me, to need me, to be willing to sacrifice anything for me because I would do exactly that for her.
I had to get away from all of that. Those types of thoughts are poison for a man like me.
The redhead stepped into my path at just the right moment. She served a purpose, the catalyst I needed to get Candi to see the real me, the man she shouldn’t trust, the man I will always be.
Somehow, though, I regretted it the second she opened the door and found me there. My brain wasn’t even working up to that point. Survival mode is like that I guess. I don’t think I breathed from the second I walked out of the room, leaving her asleep on my bed, until she pushed opened that door and found a girl on her knees with my cock in her mouth.