So, while my father was blind, Lorena had seen it all. And she didn’t judge me. She was there when I was a mess after the breakup with Mallory. Since then, she’d watched countless women do the walk of shame out of my bedroom. Despite her feelings about my actions, she always made sure my dirty sheets were cleaned. She never gave me shit unless I asked for her opinion.
Then, boy, would she give it to me.CHAPTER THREE* * *RYDERI told myself I wasn’t going to go to Montana Lane’s page again, but that was easier said than done. I’d find myself alone at night and would inevitably click over “just to see what she was doing.” Virtually hanging out with her had become a familiar and comforting experience. I’d asked her to sing for me once or twice, but mostly I just watched her as a quiet spectator.
She’d never done more than show her breasts on camera during the public chats. But she’d disappear for chunks of time, and I always wondered what was happening during those private shows.
I’d visited her page five nights in a row. But this night was different. For the first time, I decided to take a chance on something.
I didn’t even know what I was looking for, just that I wanted her to myself for a bit.
I threw down enough tokens and requested a private chat. Sweat permeated my forehead. You’re being stupid, I thought to myself, unable to believe I was actually nervous about interacting with her one-on-one.
She said goodbye to the audience and disappeared for a few seconds. Then I was granted access to the private chat room before she appeared on the screen again.
Montana waved. “Hey, ScreenGod. How are you? I thought you’d never ask.”
I typed.ScreenGod90: Hey. How does this work exactly?“Well, you know you can talk to me in this room, or even activate your camera if you want me to see you. But you certainly don’t have to show your face. Just turn your mic on so I can hear you. That way we can talk, and you don’t have to type anymore. That’s one of the benefits of the private room. If you prefer not to speak, you can keep typing, too. That’s fine.”
I hadn’t realized I would actually be able to talk to her, or that I had the option to show her what I looked like. Fuck. That definitely wasn’t going to be happening. I needed to keep myself in check. Showing her my face was risky. She couldn’t find out who I was. The whole reason I was attracted to this scenario was the anonymity.
But letting her hear my voice was harmless. I found the button to activate my mic and clicked on it.
“Can you hear me?” I said.
She smiled. “Yes. Oh my God, yes. Hi.” Montana seemed thoroughly amused.
“Hi.” I grinned. “Okay…cool. I obviously haven’t done this before.”
“Your voice is much deeper than I imagined, ScreenGod. Not what I was expecting.”
Hold up.
What the fuck?
“What were you expecting?” I asked, deepening my voice even more.
“For some reason, I thought you were going to be this shy, soft-spoken man. Your voice is nice and deep. You have a really nice voice.”
Great. She thought I was gonna sound like a girl. Nice work, Ryder.
“Thank you. So do you. I mean, not deep. But a nice voice.”
“I know what you meant.”
“Especially when you sing. Obviously you already know I love your voice,” I said.
She adjusted her legs to sit with them crisscrossed, settling into the bed.
She seemed comfortable with me. “Yeah. I’m still baffled that all you want to do is listen to me sing. I assume you wanted this private time for other reasons, though. What would you like me to do for you?”
Umm…fuck. Was I that naïve? She’d assumed I called her into this chat room for some virtual sexual favors. Admittedly, I would have loved to experience something like that with her right now—I was horny as fuck—but I couldn’t ask her to do anything. It just felt scummy.
“I just wanted to talk to you, actually.” Technically, that was the truth.
Her eyes widened. “Really?”
“Yeah.”
“Most people don’t call me in here just to talk.”
“Well, I’m not most people.”
“I already figured that out in the short time I’ve known you, ScreenGod. You’re definitely not like most of the guys who come to my page.”
I looked over at the clock. “How much time do we have?”
“Twenty minutes.” She glanced down to check her phone. “Well, fifteen now.”
“Then what?”
“Well, typically, you can tip again if you want to extend the time, or I go back to the public chat.”
“Okay.”
Montana tilted her head and stared at me through the screen. “So, what did you want to talk about?” Even though she couldn’t see me, it felt like she could.
“I’m kind of freezing up right now, to be honest. That doesn’t usually happen to me.”