“Are you sure?”
I bite my lip as he walks toward me. I take another step, but I back into the nightstand. I’m afraid to take my eyes off of Marcum.
“Careful, Dragonfly. It’d be a shame to injure these beauties,” he whispers, moving his thumb over my bottom lip, brushing it softly, forcing me to release it. “You have beautiful lips, you shouldn’t bite them,” he adds, and his words cause my stomach to feel funny. When I take in the look on his face—the look in his eyes, I feel moistness gather along the inside of my thighs. I gasp in surprise.
“Wha… what …. you… doing?” My question comes out a broken rush of air, words missing and little more than a breath in volume.
“Do you know, Toi, that I’ve been imagining kissing you for the last few weeks?”
I shake my head back and forth in denial.
“That small touch on your cheek was not a kiss. It wasn’t even close.”
“It wasn’t?”
“When I kiss you, Dragonfly, you will definitely know it.”
“I…”
“It wouldn’t be smart to kiss you now,” he says, and I get the feeling that he’s talking to himself.
“It wouldn’t?” I’m still barely whispering, but then, so is Marcum and his voice has a hoarseness mixed in with the soft tone that seems to make my body vibrate.
“Definitely not, because I can’t keep you,” he whispers. “I’m way too old for you.”
“Yeah,” I murmur, but I’m not sure what I’m answering.
“But you know what they say about older men, don’t you, Dragonfly?”
“What?”
“They’ve learned all the ways to make a woman purr,” he answers, leaning in even closer. Our lips are barely separated now. I can feel his warm breath against my skin. I should be scared. I should be saying no. I should be moving away from him.
Instead, when his fingers tenderly caress against the throbbing artery in my neck, I moan. I want his kiss.
I want Marcum to kiss me.
That’s the last thought I have before he presses his lips to mine. It’s a gentle kiss, and entirely innocent. But the things it does to me are far from innocent. I feel alive. Shivers move through my body instantaneously and they warm and excite me. I press into him, needing a deeper connection—hoping against hope he takes me in his arms. He doesn’t; the only touch he gives me is the hand on my neck, and the soft pressure of his lips against mine. He doesn’t even move his lips, but I can taste him, and the minute I do my tongue comes out without permission and licks against his lips. I hoped his would do the same, that the kiss would grow, but it doesn’t. Instead, Marcum pulls away.
“I can’t kiss you like I want, Dragonfly, because you’re not mine to keep.”
He steps back from me then. I touch my fingers to my lips, missing him so bad it hurts.
“But if you were, Dragonfly… if you ever decided I was your man… Nothing would ever keep me from you,” he literally growls, right before leaving the room.
I don’t move. I’m not even sure I’m breathing. I just stand there looking at the empty space where he used to be…and wondering what would truly happen if I told Marcum he could be my man…27Marcum“You sure about this man?” Topper asks as we watch Toi leave Desi and Harley’s room.
“Don’t have a choice,” I mutter. Desi and Harley are at the back of the room with Babs while she distracts them.
“You like her,” he says, stating the obvious.
“Quit beating a dead horse. So I like her. I’ve liked other women before. Let’s get, before she gets too far ahead of us,” I growl. I’m hurting, in a way I didn’t expect. I don’t need Topper rubbing salt in my wounds. I look over at my children. They’re going to miss Toi almost as much as I am. Harley included, even if he is struggling right now. “Hey kids, Uncle Topper has something he wants to show me. We’ll be back a bit later.”
“Okay, Dad!” Desi hollers. Harley just looks at me. He hasn’t said much since our talk. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried about how he will react to Toi being gone.
“You know as well as I do Marcum that your reactions with Toi have been different than with any other woman you’ve been around.”
“Bullshit,” I deny immediately. “She’s like every other woman.” I arguing, but I know she’s not. Toi is special. The feelings she evokes in me are different.
“It’s bad enough you’re fucking lying to yourself, but now you’re lying to me. Man I’ve been with you from the beginning.”
“So?”
“I’ve seen you deal with women. It’s always sex. Most of the time it’s just sex. Cherry was different. She’s the first woman I’ve seen you around where you seemed genuinely happy.”